Will he ever commit to me?

I've been seeing this guy for the past 8 months. I see him almost everyday. He takes me to work, takes my kids to the sitter, handles our finances...It's almost as thou we're husband and wife, yet living in separate homes, without the commitment. He's told me from the beginning that he loves and cares about me, but wants to be sure we will work before committing to a relationship. I don't get it. We're basically husband and wife, yet he isn't sure if I'm what he wants? We also don't have sex, or exchange much affection. He's the "mastermind" behind that. He doesn't want us to have sex, and he isn't very affectionate. I don't remember the last time he gave me a hug or a kiss. He said that if he were to be affectionate, it would seem fake/superficial to him. We used to see each other when we were younger and I remember him being the opposite, we always made out when we were together. He's had a few heartbreaks since then, so I think, maybe that's why he's afraid to commit or become affectionate. I don't know, but I know at times he feels distant and cold. He says that he loves me and his actions show he cares, but sometimes if I say or do something he doesn't like, he "threatens" to leave me. He's told me before that I'm the best thing that's ever happened to him, but I don't feel like he fully appreciates me, and I sometimes feel like he sabotages our relationship out of fear that I'll "do him dirty" like the females in his past. My friends and family say that he's using me because he drives my car all the time, but I can't see that being the case. He has cars of his own that he could drive. I also need mention that I am currently separated from my husband, I plan to get a divorce as soon as I have the money together, and my friend knows I'm married, and he's said that he wants me to get the divorce before he commits, is that really the only reason he won't be exclusive with me? Everyone already believes he and I are boyfriend/girlfriend because all the things they see us do for each other and we're always together. He is a great guy, but sometimes I can't help feeling like he takes my love for granted. I know I need to get this divorce, but I feel like even after the divorce is final, he still won't commit. Should I let him go until the divorce goes through, because in the mean time, I feel like he doesn't want to be with me, and it's lowering my self-esteem and I'm feeling unappreciated. He knows how much I love and care about him. I make that clear and try to tell him everyday, but he barely says it to me. He and my soon-to-be-ex know each other and I feel like he should believe that there is nothing between us. Am I in love alone?
Will he ever commit to me?
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