How often do people cheat on their partners while in the military?

[Dutchgirl97]

My boyfriend is a combat engineer and is being deployed to Kuwait next year. I know when men and women are deployed, and away from their SO for a year, things can get desperate. I know that you're not allowed to partake in sexual activity in the Military but I also know that it happens. But how often? Is it common? I trust my boyfriend but I've never been away from him for more than a week. Not sure what would happen if we didn't see eachother for a year.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Well that depends on circumstances. Age is a huge factor, the younger the more likely (and while I'm sure soldiers do cheat, from what I hear its the wives back home that do the most cheating (I know a guy who went through a nasty divorce after coming back from the military only to find she had had sex with, in his words, "every single man in the world").

stressful situations could also cause it like being in heavy combat zones and then coming back sex could be used to cope with that.

However ultimately it comes down to the person, they are the one who chooses to be faithful or not so ultimately you've got to ask yourself if he is trustworthy or not (and you should also be aware of your own failings because as you said you haven't been separated from him more then a week before, how is this going to test you?).

[PrudentGuy]

1) how much in love are both of you? If the love is strong enough, there will be no cheating, you or him.

2) Kuwait is an Islamic state. There will still be whores, but I think girls in general don't go around giving casual sex to guys.

3) as a caution, start mutual masturbation or outercouese instead of penetrative sex.

Then learn to sext or use Zoom so that you both can engage in some form of sexual release with each other. It will feel a lot better than solo and hopefully avoid cheating.

[Apple1996]

Cheating happens all the time. And when overseas its especially easy to find someone. My hubby has been deployed 3 times and never cheated but he said there was many opportunities to. Only thing you can do is trust your partner not to cheat on you

[kittenbits]

Have you ever cheated on him while he was gone?

[Apple1996]

@kittenbits no I haven't I have plenty of toys to keep me satisfied while he's gone

[kittenbits]

If you were single would you ever have a lesbian relationship or friends with benefits?

[Crowejerms]

@kittenbits hav u cheated on him

[dmvgirl16]

well i feel that there is a lot of cheating because now that men and women can be in the military then that makes it easy for men and women to communicate and often men and women can be attractive so i advise u to be careful

[SnowDrake]

It's really up to the people involved, if he's a good guy then you're fine. It's not impossible to cheat. My military friend was sexually active, his friends snuck girls in. It happens.

[BCA6010]

I guarantee you with 100% certainty that the spouses left behind stateside are much more likely to cheat in military families than the deployed soldier.

[Dutchgirl97]

Very sad.. but i can see that. Those are the worst kind of cheaters. So disgusting

[BCA6010]

Last deployment I was on, I had a guy in my squad who's fiance not only ran off with someone while he was deployed, but then bragged about it on her social media not realizing that we had (limited) internet access ourselves. Of the 130 or so guys in my company for that deployment, we had about a dozen divorces and countless breakups for pretty much the same thing. Of our married soldiers, none of them did anything of the sort though some of the single guys certainly did. Even when we were just in the field for a couple weeks doing training exercises it seems like there was always one or two spouses or girlfriends cheating on their soldiers without fail. I don't really feel sympathy for cheaters but I think a lot of soldiers and civilians badly underestimate the difficulties of being married while on active duty and it definitely plays a part.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Yeah, this is what I hear all the time. I work with a guy who got married before getting deployed and as he put it, their wasn't a guy she didn't have sex with while he was deployed. I don't know if age is a factor in that or not as most of the guys who I have heard had this happen are usually fairly young. Still its pretty screwed up to do that.

[KrakenAttackin]

@bca6010 I am sure you are familiar with the term "Field Wife".

[KrakenAttackin]

@hellionthesagereborn This is the true nature of women.

[ChocoBrownie]

The first thing guys do is ask if he has a girlfriend and show them a picture. He'll be persuaded by other guys there to think about liking guys and they'll show him their bodies, admire his in the showers. During training when they grapple each other, rubbing will be stimulative. Later at night they'll talk about it and after a few drinks... That is why so many guys in the military end up gay.

[andreasderjuengere]

Heh heh.

[NerdInDenial]

I've seen it happen quite often from both sides: military members and spouses.

[Dutchgirl97]

Is it easy to do things with others while deployed?

[NerdInDenial]

It depends; your boyfriend is in the Army, so it's not as easy to hide, but on a ship, there are plenty of spaces.

[andreasderjuengere]

People whose profession -directly or indirectly - is about murder...
will also not value the feelings of their women.

[ChocoBrownie]

Facts. And when they come back to her she wonders why he's different

[hellionthesagereborn]

Says the man who's background is a picture of a man who mass murdered hundreds of people, for the cause of socialism which mass murdered more people then every single war ever fought by the US (including the two world wars), the 100 year war, French revolution, all nine crusades and the inquisition combined at its lowest estimates of 100 million people killed (in a time span of only 90 years). Seems a little, I don't know, hypocritical.

[andreasderjuengere]

@hellionthesagereborn So you suggest that I should change my picture? (you needed 12 hrs to figure that out) I will consider it. However - it makes a difference if you say: - "Let me prepare myself to kill anyone I'm ordered to kill" or - "I'll kill this specific guy for personal (including 'idealistic) reasons"

[KrakenAttackin]

@andreasderjuengere Thank you Captain Cuck.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Except that's not how it works, at all in fact. Che Guevera saw a society and decided he liked his idea better and then proceeded to destroy that society and kill people to force his will on others. He literally left his country to do this some where else and when he was done destroying that civilization moved to another to repeat the process. Meanwhile, soldiers are sworn to protect their nation, to not go after and kill people but to be willing to fight to protect their people (rather then the socialist view of destroy any one who disagrees with me and force my will on them). So that's not an accurate representation of either side. As for the picture, I don't care what you do, I was simply pointing out you where being hypocritical because, well, you were. Also I find it ironic that che guevera is used as a symbol of socialism all while having his face plastered on so many things in order to sell them (socialists don't get irony apparently.).

[andreasderjuengere]

@hellionthesagereborn I am not a friend of socialism as a governmental form of organising a country. I do share some humanistic values, though. Off topic: 'my' picture had been commented on earlier. It was originally intended to be a provocation; but you make me realize that this was an awkward choice - which now will be 'corrected'.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Socialism doesn't have humanistic values. Seriously, the largest mass murders in the world have all happened under socialism, and that's not even guilt by association. They occurred explicitly because of socialism, are endorsed by Marxism (which requires every one be forced to convert to socialism in order to create "true" communism (according to marx this would be achieved through violence)) then proceeds to take away ownership from the people by force so that what you have worked for what you have created belongs to who ever wants it who isn't you. So your rights to that which you have created are taken away, you are mass murdered, and your singular purpose is to provide for the group except of course if the individual doesn't matter the group cannot matter either, so they take away your individuality and the rights that come with being a human being because just as your labor belongs to the group, just as your creations belong to the group, your life itself belongs to the group too. that's not humanistic, that's the exact opposite of humanistic. As for the picture, like I said its yours to do with as you please, I don't believe in appeasing the group because if the individual cannot be respected then neither can the group (because all a group is are a collection of individuals). I was merely pointing out that it was quite contradictory to your statement.

[hellionthesagereborn]

As side note, what is the picture of? It looks like its suppose to be diogenese, but I don't recognize the painting.

[andreasderjuengere]

@hellionthesagereborn Yepp: it's Diogenes of Sinope when he was visited by Alexander the Great (please; would you step out of my sunlight?) ... The trouble with ALL (!) present political theories is, that they always contain a good measure of injustice. I wish that I could offer an idea - but for now I can only refuse all of them.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Yeah, I love that story (that's what I thought it was but in most depictions that I have seen the wine "jar" is clay not wood so I wasn't entirely certain). Sure, but some have more injustice then others, socialism is nothing but injustices while capitalism is the least damaging (objectively speaking). With capitalism every interaction is voluntary, the person can be greedy however he has to work within the system to gain what he wants, this means providing a service or product that benefits the people. So ultimately it doesn't matter what his motive may be, the end result is a better society and people are better off for it (which is why true capitalist societies see greater development in technology, greater freedoms, and are far more generous in comparison to socialist ones (objectively speaking). Their will never be a utopia, but socialist think that socialism will create one and that some how the problem is the system rather then human nature (the irony being that we see human nature destroy this concept again and again and again.).

[andreasderjuengere]

@hellionthesagereborn... to make a sum up for now: isn't it best to remain neutral about political ideas, best to not be a part of military, and best to not disappoint your girl? (and to choose your 'picture' wisely...)

[CrazyRay43]

From my experiences and friends in the military, YOU are the one whose more likely to cheat, being home alone with no chance of being caught...

... my one friend’s wife was cheating, she got knocked up by the guy, kinda hard to hide that one

[coffeewithcream]

It doesn't happen every day, but maybe every weekend.

[Shamalien]

Often

[KrakenAttackin]

Military wives are super-whores. I would tell any man not to get married while In the service.

[Apple1996]

Lol dang didn't know I was a super whore 😂

[KrakenAttackin]

@Apple1996 If you aren't yet, you will be. Also, you know exactly what I am talking about.

[Apple1996]

I only whore for my husband and yess I know exactly what you talking about. Once seen a guy running naked from my neighbors back yard cause her husband was pulling in the driveway lol

[Dutchgirl97]

@Apple1996 this is not completely true. I come from a military family and even was about to go into the airforce before i became pregnant. I would NEVER cheat or think about cheating on a man i love whos serving our country. Thats disgusting and sick.

[KrakenAttackin]

@dutchgirl97 Yeah, you say that until your husband is deployed for six months and you start getting lonely and realize "you have needs". I can't imagine why any military man gets married.

[Apple1996]

Men in the military get married for the extra money. Some guys will literally marry strippers just to have a house and extra money lol And yes true not all military people cheat but a lot do

[KrakenAttackin]

@Apple1996 Any man who marries "for extra money" is beyond stupid.

[Apple1996]

I guess lol. Me and my husband got married cause we loved eachother and wanted to stay living together while he was in the army and getting married is the only way to do that

[JamesBlackDragon]

If you're worried about this you need to end things because you have trust issues

But from my understanding it happens sometimes not sure the percentage

[Dutchgirl97]

I trust him. Just a little thought in the back of my head. Im not sure how men think when they are away for a whole year..

[JamesBlackDragon]

I see if you trust him just believe everything will be OK

[MrMatasch]

If you cheated to him.. You won't care if he's cheating you or not

[Dutchgirl97]

I would never even think about doing that.

[Anonymous]

Good luck honestly... I could never be so trusting.

[Crowejerms]

Me eitber