Wow. Thank you for sharing your story! Very wise advice.
Not a problem. Best of luck to you!
id be into it
@timrimbim So you have a fetish for being treated like a little child, okay. But most people don't.
It usually means they take on a larger role in managing the daily life within the relationship. They’re making decisions and delegating a lot of tasks, and they’ll likely consider the others opinion on whatever matter it is, but then they’ll get the final say.
That sounds absolutely awful.
Many men prefer it. I know men with depression and anxiety that can’t properly handle the pressure of being the leader in the relationship.
Regardless of gender, this doesn't sound healthy. What decisions are we talking about here?
For example, let’s say a couple is planning a weekend trip to a city they’ve never been before. Who drives? Who make the decision about which hotel to stay? Who pays?
Sounds very strange to me, but okay.
The whole "taking the lead" thing just sounds so ridiculous to me. Not necessarily because of the dynamic it creates (although I personally would hate that kind of dynamic) but rather because of how it's being made a thing at all. "Hey, I'm gonna TAKE THE LEAD NOW! Follow me into our relationship, honey! I will lead the way to our future!"It just doesn't sound like a grown up thing to me.
Well I mean it would be awkward if one said that lol
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Good take, and I agree.
That’s not the only negative if you raise kids together, boys will grow up acting like girls & the girls will grow up acting like dudes in various ways. It can create lifelong social problems for them. But of course feminists claim men & women are equal and deny this.
Nope, no. Girls won't act like guys and guys won't act like girls. It doesn't work like that, so if my father was a criminal then I'd be a criminal too? No. As for OP, I wouldn't mind a relationship like that, it makes you free to do the decisions, isn't that wonderful? To me both sides would benefit. It sucks that you initiate it 90% of the time, you should talk about it and if no solution, make him starve. I don't think he would be in a sane mind starving with his girl seducing him at home
@Mithradath yes it does work like that which is why boys raised by single moms are emotional just like women in the vast majority of cases. I also came from a home with a dominant mom & my sister acts like a dude. I had to reprogram myself. But you go run social experiments on your kids, going against thousands of years of human wisdom on the matter.
Had your guy ever seen a doctor? His low sex drive combined with his low effort is a red flag.
What the actual fuck are you talking about?If he has to take charge he might as well stay single too, right? Doesn't that make a good reason to ask his girl to take charge?
I am also no feminist and still gonna say that this is utter bullshit.
@-Asca-Either he is a MAN or he is NOT. A man is called to be the bead of the household. NOT a WOMAN. If he doesn't, then yes, maybe he should stay single, because a woman doesn't want to keep ruling a man. That is what most feminist want, which may of you condemn. That is not a man. That is not still wanting to to suckle under mommy.
@CubsterShuraDoesn't matter what anyone consider bull. A man does his job. A boy isn't ready to do his job. The only time given that a woman should take over is when he is out of commission to do so. That is temporory. Not indefinitely. That is enough to cause frustration, constant stress, and it makes a woman feel like she is wasting her time. Hence why a lot of women become bossing, unhappy, and put so much strain on a God. And it was the first thing a man want to talk about is how nagging their women are. Can't have it both ways. Everybody has a job to do. Everybody. And if that is not something that he wants to do, he is free to be by himself or he can find somebody else again who would like it. I will not have somebody like that in my life. Not only goes against my morals that goes against my standards. A woman cannot lead herself. I cannot lead myself. If I have to leave myself, I would do so and it'll be done by the grace of God. I've been doing that my entire life. But when it comes down to having a partnership, I expect that person to do what she has to do as a man. A woman does not want to deal with a man that she cannot Depend and rely on. That's the point of him being a leader, a protector, and a provider. If he cannot fulfill these things that he is not suited for a relationship. This is why there is so much argument and divorce. How can a woman respect a man if a man cannot respect himself? A man that is afraid to do his job as one is somebody that doesn't love himself. And somebody that needs to Define himself in his life who does he want to be.
@btbc92 I am sorry to inform you that society has progressed and we don't live in the 1950s anymore.
That is a boy who wants to still suckle under mommy*
You think Society has progressed I guess that's why the divorce rate is so high, and why a lot of men don't want to get married to stay married! Add about the 1950s, and it doesn't matter if it's 2020 or 2034. The rules are still the rolls! You want to live in that the side of you go right ahead then when a woman wants to leave you for another man then don't complain about women. You guys at speak that garbage make me laugh.
They would a woman steps over you. Doesn't respect you, doesn't love you, doesn't appreciate you, you stop whining and complaining about what she'd of it. Don't even look at one world do you do. A real woman wants a man to lead. That is what makes a woman attracted to a man. She doesn't want a man that's weak. She wants a man that strong. And weakness have nothing to do with physical strength. It has to do with your mentality. Because if she can't rely on you, she's going to go to another guy who is reliable. This is why a lot of women and now miss independent they could do bad all by themselves. We have education, we have careers, we can both, we can do all of that now. We can do strength training for mucles some of you don't even have. Get cars, carpentry, fight in wars, travel. We don't need your permission. We don't need you. So remember you just said is not the 1950s no more. So what use are you as a man except for emotional validation, sex, and babies? Think about that before you does something you know nothing about out of your mouth. So don't look for us to be needing you. Because now it's another if we don't want you either. I didn't ask for this. But I will do what I have to do if it makes my survival.
My thought is that a man is what he wants to be. Many men are naturally less assertive and would rather a women he partners with to take the lead.
Yes, because often times they aren't taught how. Those kinds of relationships rarely last. If a man is not assertive women eventually get turned off.
It’s often a personality type. You can be taught and still not enjoy it.
It has nothing to do with this personality type, I have to do what what makes a man a man and what makes a woman a woman. A man is supposed to be the head of the household. It doesn't matter how sensitive he is. I know men that are very sensitive, I have sex with men in my family, and one thing they never did was make excuses about what they don't want to do as a mess. They raised their families, they let their families, the detective their families, and they make sure that their families lack nothing. Not about doing what you don't enjoy. About doing what is needed to be done. Just because I don't like cooking, so that mean I should not cook? If so then neither I or my family would eat. That what it means to grow up, to put it mean to be an adult, and that's what it means to have a family. You take care of your responsibilities.
I guess this is why there's a lot of Mama's Boys out there that are still checking up at their parents houses and expecting mothers to always take care of them. Get there looking for another mother in a sexual partner. One of my grandfathers was sensitive before they passed away. They love their family to bits. However, get out of line and you saw another side you wished you didn't see. That's how they were back in the day. Nowadays they will call them spineless weak men who are too cowardly to do what is hard.
I have sensitive men in the family*
What if the woman wants to be the lead in the house?
Then she can't complain when she's the one that has to do all the work. And she can't say how her man is lazy. Then she can't say how she wish she had a different man. Because she is the one that says she wants to leave in the house. She's the one that wants to change her dress and skirt for pants. Worse for pants too tight up her butt. She can't complain when she's the one that brings trouble in her life. Many women tend to like that idea at first. But in a long run, it drains the person. And it not only affects her life it affects her husband's life. There's a reason why a lot of men run away from bickering woman. And why the Bible says it is best for a man to live in the corner of a roof, then to live in a house of a contentious woman.
Lead in the house*
Yeah. My husband and I have a pretty good egalitarian arrangement going. I’m more career ambitious than he is, so there are times when I’m working most of the day and he’s not, I need him to be making dinner as I finish my work. I don’t need him to be a provider, as I prefer to provide for myself and help him out too if he needs. What I need from him most is loyalty, support, and for him to be accommodating when I’m too busy to work and run the house at the same time. I don’t want to do it all either so that’s when I’ll ask him to do dishes or whatever else needs to be done.
But what you going on about in your marriage has nothing to do about who is submissive and who is the head of the household. What you have is not an egalotarian arrangement. What you have going on is a marriage. That is how a marriage is supposed to be. But he's the one that has to be making serious decisions. It's just that you are more organized than he is. So he relies on you to be organized. But at the end of the day he is still the head. That is what the husband is supposed to do is help his wife anyway he can. These days everybody has to contribute a lot more because we are living in the fast pace society. But if you don't want to do everything, then you have to let him know what it is that you need of him so that way you can be more at ease. You have to allow him to grow to become the man that he needs to be. He can't be like that forever because if not as he gets older he'll get more frustrated and God forbid unhappy. So I highly suggest you take Serious consideration of that.
There are many decisions he doesn’t care to make. I don’t regard him as the head of the house because he’s not, and he agrees.
Someone's extremely bitter that life isn't a fairy tale with your prince doing a swordfight for you 😂
Who here is being bitter about something? Please don't go around assuming things about other people and putting things in other's mouth. Because what you're talkin about is why a lot of men no longer have much respect for women nowadays. And trust me, you'll be glad it will be a man doing a source by any cuz you would not want to see me doing any fighting. There's a good reason why a good amount of men are intimidated by me. I don't play with anyone.
I feel the same way as you. Though I don't mind leading at all; I just don't want to be a dictator.
If you want that arrangement but many do not.
It's not about wanting it. It's science.
It is okay. It's reality.
Well I’m not obeying that lol
Good luck with that.
It’s been working so far
I doubt that.
That’s your choice.
Yes, I choose to agree with science.
Just because a woman can give birth doesn’t mean she will or has to. Same with leadership and men.
I have never met a woman without kids that was truly happy that she didn't have kids.
Men cannot participate in childbirth. Only women are capable of childbirth.
Men carry the burden of leadership. Women carry the burden of childbirth. This is reality.
I’m 36 and I’ve been with my husband for 13 years. He’s very introverted and says there are times he appreciates when I take the lead. But I don’t do it all the time. We also don’t have kids and are very in agreement this is where we are happy right now. Im an aunt and he’s an uncle and that’s enough for us.
Possiblity the worst post in the history of posts.
I bet you drink a lot of soy milk
No I just know what women desire
Lmao: “I know what women desire”. Yeah, dude, they want to be worshiped as gods. We know. We don’t all worship false gods tho.
Goddess's get it right
You’re going to be one of those broke dudes who is crying cause “his” woman kicked her out of her house. That’s what happens when you put 100% into worshiping the devil.
Ok dude whatever
@hahahmm I'm a bit confused. Did u just call women devils?
I agree and disagree. . I wouldn't put the entire relationship in womens hands, but like 50/50. by the way.. not ALL women are smarter than men. There are a few fake diamonds.
He did call women devil's because I said women should be worshipped
@hahahmm Women dont want to be worshiped like gods, but they wanted to be treated with respect. They don't want to be at home doing the dishes, cooking food, and getting groceries. They dont want their occupation to be "SUBURBAN HOUSEWIFE". They want to do what they do best, and follow their dreams. I only kick guys who don't respect me, out of my house.
Venombm1313 you’re only the devil when a man worships you as a god. So it depends on the relationship
@venomhbk1313 Sock and Block, dear! xx
Veno, in what ways do you think women are smarter and understand more?
Because they listen and they have more brains than we do
You coud at least take charge of your 'r' key :P
nah your in charge you got to fuck him
A woman leaves her home to go to man's house and have kids with him. A man is supposed to be a pillar. A woman will support her man in times of stress. A man will support her woman and stand by her when she is emotionally upset. The woman becomes a mother, feeds the child and takes care of the child and also sacrifices her career to take care of the child and raise the child. A man understands and works hard to earn more for the family and kids future. The woman will shell her savings ( that she earned in her career) times of stress her man is facing but the man does not allow her to spend her own savings but spend his beacuse of the sacrifices she made. Is it easy to leave mom dad and settle with an entirely new family? Is it easy to leave career and stay - raise kids? Is it easy to raise a family? How will a kid feel when all other classmates in his or her class praises mom's handmade food but this kid doesn't get mother's handmade food beacuse she did not give time to her kids and was instead working? A woman is a wife who later becomes mother and also gives emotional support to the kids not just physically raising them. Why do you think why kids sometimes grow up and get agressive or immature because they weren't close to their mother. So it's not embarrassing that a woman won't support a man financially except when he is in a financial crisis, that too a man recieving the wife's money unwillingly which is embarrassing for a man. A real man will take care of his wife and make a family and never expect anything from them except to give and receive their love. So remember to respect every woman out there who choses to be housewife or have a career or do anything because a woman can give kids and not a man. A man needs woman to start a family. A woman doesn't need man.
No it would be too much work lol
I got the impression that you’re lazy.
Im not lazy, I’m just not someone who likes to be micromanaged but I also don’t like to have to be the one to micromanage others. I’d rather my man to work with me and put in effort as well.
Being a leader, manager, whatever you want to call it doesn’t mean micromanaging. It means making the ultimate decisions.
Yeah if they are accommodating if I asked, “hey while I’m doing x, can you do y?” Sometimes that’s what happens, but some things we trade off in making decisions. I overthink certain decisions too, especially when it comes to making purchases.
You’ve got me lost here. I don’t care what you do.