Would you have sex with a girl in your ex coworker friend group if she asked?

Question

to clarify it’s already an odd friendship; it’s a same friend group but don’t talk until you’re alone and then you feel compelled to tell them everything situation. i don’t have feelings for him but—for some reason i told him this—i’m also a virgin at 22. i’m just embarrassingly anxious. i’m not looking for a relationship and i’m not emotionally available enough either. and i know there’s people who prefer to wait but that’s just not what i want. the only issue with just going out—besides a pandemic—is that i am anxious so i would just want to be able to trust them. he’s been single for like six months now and a little while ago out friend group got together and i ended up staying at his house lather than everyone but this one other girl. this group is mainly my coworkers and we’re close but not like best friend close. so apparently the other girl has been going for him and they banged after i went home at like 10am. now under different circumstances, this would all be fine. but this is the second time he's made a move on me. a couple years ago he was single and we were at a party and he stayed in with me the whole time and was touching my leg. now he's complimenting my hair and touching it, asking me about my type, about sex, not wanting a relationship, tinder, etc. like one of the reasons i haven’t gone for it is that our friend he was with seems to be catching feelings talking about kids out of nowhere. like i just don’t want to make a move if they genuinely like each other. and i want to know if it would be wrong to just be straight up? should i tell him i know about him and our friend? should i just say listen you don’t scare me so you’re a good contender to do this with, and if you’re down i’m down? pls help me i’m just scared to offend anyone and rejection.

Answer 1

zeitgeist057 | 166 opinions shared on Relationships topic.

Guru

You sound very conscientious and mature about all of this, and also very honest. Tbh, you sound like a very aware and healthy person, but my concern would be that the other parties might not be as mature as you. The girl especially, might get insanely jealous, possessive, and angry to find out that you "knew about them" but then "made. a move" on "her man".

I think you should just play it by ear, you have a good head on your shoulders, are honest and considerate. If you don't have any feelings for this guy, then it doesn't really matter if he is the one you have sex with or not, you might make it happen with him, or perhaps someone else will come along. Do I understand your motivation is simply you are tired of being a virgin, and want to start experiencing the pleasures of sex?

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1 Person

Asker

1 y
thank you! yeah the only reason i thought if i’m going to find someone at least it’s someone who i trust but don’t have to see if it goes bad. we were all surprised when we found out, we just never saw it happening. but during the one night we talked about just wanting to be single and she would come downstairs to sit with us for a bit and then get up and go back upstairs. she told one of our friends that “they” were waiting for me to leave but the guy didn’t go upstairs until i was falling asleep. i just was thinking maybe it couldn’t hurt to just ask him and if it happens between them again then no hard feelings. it’s just an awkward subject to bring up.
zeitgeist057

1 y
np. oh and I guess I didn't actually answer your question, but yes, if any girl/virgin asked me to have sex with her and I found her attractive, I would have sex with her. There are very few things that would "disqualify" her, if she met the first two parameters (attraction and consent). So lmk if you need a backup? ;)

Answer 2

Asker

thank you! yeah the only reason i thought if i’m going to find someone at least it’s someone who i trust but don’t have to see if it goes bad. we were all surprised when we found out, we just never saw it happening. but during the one night we talked about just wanting to be single and she would come downstairs to sit with us for a bit and then get up and go back upstairs. she told one of our friends that “they” were waiting for me to leave but the guy didn’t go upstairs until i was falling asleep. i just was thinking maybe it couldn’t hurt to just ask him and if it happens between them again then no hard feelings. it’s just an awkward subject to bring up.

Answer 3

zeitgeist057

np. oh and I guess I didn't actually answer your question, but yes, if any girl/virgin asked me to have sex with her and I found her attractive, I would have sex with her. There are very few things that would "disqualify" her, if she met the first two parameters (attraction and consent). So lmk if you need a backup? ;)

Answer 4

iseekpinetrees | 518 opinions shared on Relationships topic.

Guru

Just go for it. As long as ur not working with them ur good.

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Answer 5

Tea-Spaghetti

Explorer

Well I would probably bang but I didn't read all the details

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Answer 6

REDHOTLINE | 170 opinions shared on Relationships topic.

Yoda

Only if I like and find attractive her

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Answer 7

Yuuibtony | 52 opinions shared on Relationships topic.

Xper 7

Yes, if it happens it happens

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Would you have sex with a girl in your ex coworker friend group if she asked?

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