I keep Falling in love with abusive men. What is wrong with me?

Chelseab-87
My first love at 16 became physical abusive and that relationship went on until I was 21 years old. It was traumatizing and stressful. My step dad physically abused me when I was a child. He yelled, punched holes in the walls above my head and hit me with a belt that left marks on my body. I was broken and just wanted love from him. My biological father rejected me and was not in my life. I been with good guys but somehow I sabotage the relationship it because I feel a lack of passion.

Moving forward...

Im now in a new relationship with a guy that I’m in love with. But... unfortunately, I feel like Im may be in an emotional abusive relationship. He yells at me, belittles me sometimes, even threatened to hit me but never did. He tells me that I’m not smart, and I talk too much. And repeatedly told me to just be quiet and just look pretty. I feel so weak for allowing this relationship to go on. Logically I know I should leave but emotional I feel attached. I believe I’m subconsciously choosing horrible men and feeling love from their abuse ( mental insane?). I submit and feel like I’ll do anything for him to love and choose me. I feel rejected and I still brag for his attention. When he yells and threatens me I find my self needing to please him even more. What is wrong with me? I feel so crazy and mental insane and I know something is off with me. I don’t know how to fix it or identify my problems.
I keep Falling in love with abusive men. What is wrong with me?
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