How do I get my girlfriend to change her behavior with me? How can I get her to listen and really hear me?

wtf636
Basically I have to be the peacemaker in my relationship. We would have already broken up by now, if I was not the one to apologize basically everytime. I can only think of one time I have heard her say I'm sorry.

She tells me about all the things I do that she doesn't like, makes comments about what I eat cause she is vegetarian, tells me the issues her parents have with me, and basically tells them all of the issues in our relationship. Which if I did the same, my parents would hate her.

Besides all this, we usually have a pretty great time together, have a good sex life, and I find her attractive. But she just gets in these moods sometimes, and while I understand, I am not allowed the same leaway.

She is moving away for internship soon (phd psych doctorate) and has not even asked me if I wanted to go yet, has not told me she loves me, and overall just doesn't seem very sensitive to my needs at all. If I have an issue with something it is usually, well this is how I am take it or leave it.

She is just sooooo... negative. All the time. And I find myself constantly pushing aside my wants and feelings to accomodate hers. Having to reassure her that I like her, and want to be with her. As well as pull her out of these moods of "I don't want to be here", "just let me die", "life is so hard". Like hearing about how you don't want to be alive when you are spending time with me is not something I want to hear all the time, and how do I even respond to that. I have told her to stop saying it so much, but then I am not allowing her to express herself.

How do I get this woman to realize If this all continues I will not be joining her even if she asks me, as I would not feel comfortable sacrificing everything I have in this city (family, good job, friends) for someone who treats me the way she does. I don't want to threaten to leave, but I'm starting to feel like I have no other option. And even then nothing might change.
How do I get my girlfriend to change her behavior with me? How can I get her to listen and really hear me?
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