Relationship question for the boys?


Okay so my boyfriend were together forr 3 years at the time, currently almost 5, I have alwyas had anxiety so I was always worrying. Mostly because I knew. He was texting other girls, they sent photos back and forth, he followed girls that sent him nudes, he he chatted with one girl telling her that she should come see him. She lived out of state. Anyway, anytime I told him I knew, or saw, hed lie and ignore me. He didn't caree about my feelings. He had a "best friend" he flirted with. He texted his ex, which I wouldn't have cared if he didn't lie about it for weeks. He alwyas thought nothing was fair when I told him to not be up all night on snap, he felt limited anytime I set boundaries (for good reasons, too.) He wouldn't eeven let me meet his ex or his "best friend" orr to even text them to just keeep thigns peaceful. Sometimes hed try to blame me.. Well, eventually I left him because i felt numb and i was finally able to. I ended up seeing another guy who i was close friends with because he made me feel worth it when I felt so worthless. But I didn't have feelings for him. My "ex" and I did end up getting back together, soemtimes he bringg sup what I did like what I did was worse, and he can't seem to understand how bad he hurt me and that it's a daily struggle. I even forgave him and he can't even do the same. He has stopped texting girls, he deleted snapchat, he removed the nudes software other girls phone his phone, he has definitely changed. Except he keeps bringing up what I've done especially when we have an argument.

Honestly guys.. does thsi sound like he wants to (or has ever wanted to) actually be with me? I dont see why he would have treated me like that for years if he actually loved me? I know he's definitely being better, but does he actually wanna be with me? I mean I wassnt good enough for him for years, what's changed? I mean, even now we dont really do anything couples do..

There is more to the story but you get ssome of the picture...
Relationship question for the boys?
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