How to date a man with abandonment issues?

I'm 28 years old and my boyfriend is in his 40s. He's been divorced for three years (she left him) and then he got engaged a year later to another woman he was apparently madly in love with. She left him as well because apparently her heart just wasn't in it. He was crushed.

He and I have been together for four months now. For the most part, it's been great, but sometimes he pushes me away.

He told me he he was in love with me after 3 months together, and I told him I loved him too. He told me he was "all in," and that he's serious about me and us, and he told me it would be okay if I started leaving things at his place, and he even gave me my own closet. I started spending most of my nights there.

The following weekend I met his son for the first time (he was down visiting and lives a few hours away), Thanksgiving weekend. We all had the most incredible weekend together.

After that weekend ended, he got incredibly distant. He started picking fights with me, wanted more alone time than usual, and I basically thought he was going to breakup with me. He didn't though and I stuck it out that painful week and a half.

He's back to being somewhat normal, and he explained to me he has abandonment issues, and that it was nothing I did, he's just terrified I'll leave him, or he'll get hurt. We have a great time together still, but he's still awkward about me spending the night (I have once since the falling out), and he seems to have put up a bit of a wall, compared to before when he was "all in".

Two nights ago, he told me, "I hope you know I love you, right?" I told him I do know, and he apologized for his actions and told me, "I really do love you;" however, he's still being kind of distant.

I'm just not sure how to deal with this wall he has up. Do I wait it out and hope it will eventually come down? I love him a lot, but I'm also scared he's going to pull away completely and leave me. What do I do?
How to date a man with abandonment issues?
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