I (20F) have been dating boyfriend (19M) for two years. It used to feel really great but lately I’ve been feeling out of love with him because I don’t feel valued in the relationship.
We’ve had problems in the past but persevered because I really did (do?) love him. But he’s never made me feel like a priority.
I wasn’t his first choice girl so I already feel self-conscious about that. But my dad got into a near-fatal accident and my boyfriend was supposed to take me to the hospital but never came. He later said he thought he would get in the way. We got past it. He never congratulated me about any new jobs (in fact he asked me where I worked one year into the relationship after I’d talked about it like twice a week) or accomplishments. He never comments on my social media posts but did for his ex. He lets me pay for a lot/most of our stuff, including his needs (sports streaming, hangers, etc). He told me the women he thinks are more beautiful than me. He forgot a date near to my heart and stood me up due to forgetting. And he bumped me from a dinner to a coffee date on his birthday and spent longer with some other girl studying. He is very studious, so I doubt he was cheating I think he just wasn’t being sensitive. He won’t defend me against what his parents say about me (racist, bodyshame, etc).
I know that all sounds so bad but he then did really well for a while (flowers, attention, etc). He only acts badly when he’s stressed but unfortunately that’s quite often. Otherwise he’s a great boyfriend. Funny and smart and handsome and my parents ADORE him.
But Lately he has tests coming up and is uninvested again. He cuts me off quick from physical affection, types while I’m telling him about my day, only wants to talk about him, etc and I’m finally at my wits end. I’m tired of feeling clingy and invalidated.
I told him this and he said he’d do better but it felt like appeasing.
Should I leave him even if I still have some sort of feelings for him? Thanks!