I feel like boyfriend is taking advantage of me. do I stay or do I go?

my boyfriend and I planned to spend tonight together and the entire labor day weekend until he called me last night telling me that the classes he had Monday (which were cancelled) would be moved to Friday (when he normally doesn't have classes). he NEVER said anything about me not coming over tonight or any kind of plans for the weekend.

tonight he called asking to see if I was coming over after his classes tomorrow which end at 5. it would mean me driving over in rush hour traffic which is REALLY bad where we live. I acted surprised that he wanted me over tomorrow night, and asked what exactly his expected plans with me were for the weekend. he said I would spend Friday night, Saturday night and a little bit of Sunday with him then leave.

i know he's in school, but there's no school Monday, and I don't understand why he wouldn't want me to spend Sunday night and leave Monday (which I didn't say to him) but he wants me to leave EARLY Sunday so he can spend Monday studying.

i just feel like it's not really worth it for me to go see him and spend less than 2 days with him.

i've been feeling like he's been taking me for granted and doesn't appreciate me, and I feel like this is just another example of him not treating me the way I feel like I should be treated.

should I go or would I just be continuing to let him take advantage of me?

side note: the way I feel I should be treated is as soon as he knew he would have classes on Friday he should have re-made the plans we had for the weekend and give me a clear idea of what his schedule would be like for the next week in terms of studying. I know him well enough to KNOW he will NOT be studying Sunday after I leave (if I go) or even spend the whole day studying Monday. I would be OK with going over and staying until Monday morning so he could study Monday.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well how far away is he from you? If he's an hour or less away I don't see how you see it a 'waste' to spend less than 2 days with him. Now if it's going to be a 6 hours drive or something, and you're going to be driving at rush hour, and he changed the plans last minute, then I can understand why you're a bit annoyed. BUT 1. it's not like he's ditching you for his friends or anything. He still wants to spend the weekend with you, just not the WHOLE weekend. His school plans unexpectedly changed, he can't help that. Also there have been so many times where I decline an offer to hang out with friends/boyfriend to study, only to end up not even studying because I procrastinate so much, so if this is what your boyfriend is like, I'm sure he actually does have intentions to try and study. 2. Did you even talk to him about this? It doesn't sound like he's taking advantage of you at all; if he knew how annoyed you were about this I'm sure he would at least apologize, and try to compromise. He's a guy, he probably doesn't even realize this has become an inconvenience for you. If I were you I would either talk to him or just let it go because it really doesn't sound like he's being a jackass or anything.


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What Girls Said 3

  • If you don't like something don't put up with it

  • Go... If you don't feel comfortable in a relationship then what's the point? Relationships are all about compromises and meeting the other person half way... If you feel like your giving more than he is then tell him. Let him know how you feel about the situation and the relationship in general and if after that you still feel taken advantaged of the Go. And look for someone that cares about your needs as well as his own.

  • you're overreacting.

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