Why do men act mad when they're hurt?

I broke a promise to my boyfriend, now he is being mean, saying he's done, but I know he loves me. He says he's giving me tough love, but I feel if you love someone, you shouldn't be mean to them. So is he just being mean 'cuz he's hurt? What should I do? Is he being mean 'cuz he hurts or what?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think being mean/mad after being hurt is pretty natural.

    Wouldn't you get angry/mad if someone just used you for sex? I know it's not exactly the same thing but I mean, come on. If you get mad/angry after being hurt than it would be reasonable to assume that men do as well.

    So yes, I think he is being mean because you hurt him.

    Well.. the guy most likely lost his trust in you so I guess you might need to work on rebuilding that & that's if the guy can forgive/look past it.

    I know I wouldn't be able the trust the same person twice even if I loved them but then again that's how I am. Maybe the guy your with is different.

    • You are right! Thank you!

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What Guys Said 2

  • It's not an act, he's mad at you because you hurt him.

    Maybe he does love you, but feels like because you broke your promise you don't love him. It all boils down to trust.

    • You are right! I am doing what I can to make myself better, so I can be better to him. Thank you!

  • "I feel if you love someone, you shouldn't be mean to them. "

    I feel if you love someone, you shouldn't lie to them.

    • You are right and I feel terrible, but I am getting the help I need to not do what I've done! Thanks for your answer.

    • OK, good luck. I hope you two work things out.

What Girls Said 2

  • "Should" is a crazy word. "If you love someone, you shouldn't be mean to them." If you love someone, you shouldn't break a promise to them. He's most likely being mean to protect himself and to emphasize what a big deal it is, since you clearly think it's not. You hurt him. What are you doing to take responsibility on yourself and make it better?

    • I am getting the counseling that I need to not do what I did ever again, I'm also trying to get a job to help my self-esteem, I'm also respecting his space & I'm trying to be a better me by learning to love myself. I DO realize now that breaking a promise is VERY bad of me, I know I'll never DO that again, because what I did wasn't worth all the hurt I caused. Thank you for your comment! You are right! :)

    • Show All
    • Thank you for your support and help! :) Him & I did have a genuine conversation, he does love me and is hurting, but he says he wants some space for himself and I need some too, to focus on myself and get right with myself & get established. He was kind about it, there is hope.

  • He's just masking the hurt with an emotion that makes him temporarily stronger

    • That is the kind of man he is. I will have to regain his trust back. Thank you!

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