Why do most guys say they don't want a relationship?

Like as if its a disease or something. I mean, are we girls that bad to be with? Cause I keep hearing from guys, "i don't want the drama." I mean, wow, like we are the only ones who bring drama. So why are guys like this but us girls want it more than them?

I guess that explains why only guys want us for sex only. Sad :(


Most Helpful Guy

  • Straight up... I feel you... but just know that our thought process IS different.

    We take things from what we see alot, so we see girls get all emotional, and to us, that's not something we wish to just want to deal with.

    It really has to be the right female to make you not mind dealing with it.

    Some guys must have something to offset the emtional stress.

    Such as a pretty face, or a nice body.

    I'll tell you this, most guys will go for a chick that can match wits with them.

    Pound for Pound!

    The best girls in my opinion, are the ones that are mostly like guys.

    Less complaining, similar ideas and interest will get you just about any guy.

    So its not like a disease, but we need to be matched with a female that equals out the possible stress factor we think we will receive within a relationship.

    This is a inner-unrecognized characteristic, that I think most of all guys will agree with.

    & relationships don't work a lot times on our end because we don't feel that our stress is being canceled out by what she's offering.

    This may be a little hard to understand, but trust me its true!

    All we want is to be happy.

    Ask me anything... I'm more than willing to answer your questions.

    I hope this helps! & Good Luck on your research of this question.


    A Loving Black Man


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What Guys Said 5

  • Ever wonder why guys make such easier less stressful friends? This is because the maintence on male friendship is less strenious.

    We say what we think and want and then use rationality to solve it, without emotion.

    Emotions and feelings are things guy usually don't account too much and when you bring a women in, she challenges us to explore these areas. Some guys don't want to add this to their lievs or at least, aren't prepared for it.

    We're like to drink the boozed without taking the AA class.

    • I understand that. We are very emotional and I'm starting to think you guys don't really like us. no wonder we are only wanted for sex cause you don't like us because we emotional. sad.

    • Well the thing is, girls are overly emotional and not enough rational, Guys are just the opposite.

      As we get older, we both learn from one another creating a balance of both.

  • In so many small ways...

    I guess some guys, do only want some girls for sex only...

    Every girl has their own fighting chance with a guy.

    As long as they are both attracted to each other, the girl has a fighting chance to be with that guy as she wants.

    Don't try to make it as though all girls are innocent and want to be in long committed relationships. That's not the case...

    I swear, females can be so confusing...

    You care about some things that have no relevance.


    Just this weekend, my friend and his girl were arguing about who the guy from the hangover was dating...

    He knew... but he didn't care.

    She went so far as to leave, and lie about going to get some tissue, just so she could go and prove him wrong, and couldn't accept that he was right.

    But even in being right, he didn't even care, which earned him the title of "a jerk" from her.

    She was upset that he didn't care about that situation like she did.

    Now how much sense does that make?

    Those people are living their lives, and she is causing problems in their relationship...

    Can you see what I mean...

    I have sooooo many examples...

    But don't make it like your not wanted.

    Everything I do, in the end, is for a female.

    For females...

    I cut my hair

    I futher educate myself for higher job positions

    I keep a very clean house

    Dress nice


    So many things...

    Just for the best of a relationship...

    Don't make guys out to be the bad guys here.

    Its always a cause and effect situation.

    While your single, work on yourself to be the best possible future girlfriend/wife you can be.

    So don't sit on here and complain about guys not wanting a relationship.

    This is exactly the reason why they don't seek one so determined as females do.


    A Loving Black Man

  • As a man who has read a book called "Marriage...And How To Avoid It", I am one of those men. Why? We have an impractical assumption that once we get in a relationship...our social lives are over. It's not because we're tough, it's because we are afraid. I'm saying this very humbly so I don't mean we are pussies. I'm just saying what most guys aren't willing to. We want that fun single life sometimes too much for our own good. So be gentle with us. Reassure us that we aren't going to be trapped under your hot black boots attached to your even hotter long legs...lol

    Believe me, we want the relationship in the end, we're just scared about love just like the next guy/girl.

    • 'scared' That's the keyword right there. Scared to feel and it sucks for us girls cause we feel all the time and we don't try to hid it like guys do. this whole be a man thing and don't cry cause it shows weakness is y relationships have promblems cause the man is holdin back and it upsets us then we argue. if you all will just show us how you feel, we'll solve things better.

    • Show All
    • Ok. then things will never change. I bet if we really did go to venus and yall go to mars. Everyone will have nothing to complain about and there would be no more double standards and what's gay or not. That famous book "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus." very true

    • Lol of course things will never change...as far as how we men and you women cope with things...it's just human and social nature...the key is for both of us to understand not only ourselves but others...and yes Men are actually from Mars and women are actually from Venus...lol

  • "are we girls that bad to be with?" yes. many girls are simply not worth it.

    "Cause I keep hearing from guys, 'i don't want the drama.' I mean, wow, like we are the only ones who bring drama." Women bring _far_ more drama than men do. I'm a business manager. I've managed groups of mostly men, and groups of mostly women. The men tend to work hard, don't complain much, and tend to offer practical win-win ideas that will benefit the company, me, and their fellow workers. Women, on the other hand, are more likely to be entitled. Women whine about everything, complain a lot more, file more petty formal complaints, get in useless pIssing contests and catfights with each other, and cost the company a hell of a lot more money. I'm not exaggerating even remotely. Routinely -- I mean every month -- a woman will ask to leave work early, and then complaint that her paycheck was short! We're paid by the hour, lady, if you leave at lunch, you don't have the right to get paid for the remaining 4 hours of the day. Men _never_ do crap like that.

    So if the women I've managed are anything like the general population of women, I can see why guys don't want to commit to spoiled, inconsistent, selfish, whining girls.

    • So yall don't like us?

    • This guy is actually correct in his ideas...

      His delivery however is kinda mean... but still...

      That last paragraph is what you should read if you don't read anything else he wrote...

      So many women, even though I love them, can be very "child-like", as what he's explaining is child-like qualities. Not all women, but MANY!


      A Loving Black Man

    • Your right

  • Look at the way sitcoms and the media portray guys in relationships. Always miserable, unhappy with their wives and girlfriends, and having no freedom.

    • We want to be in somethin more meaningful than guys. Most of us but guys don't treat us like we are worth more than sex and we are tired of it.

    • Show All
    • My past relationships have nothing to do with this question. Before the sex, guys would always say this and I even hear other girls on this site complaning about guys not wanting relationships like we do. So my personal life has nothing to so with why men are this way. As far as freedom, I agree. Relationships do tend to take a toll on things but that's part of a relationship. You can still have fun but don't forget that person too and it has a lot to do with sex too. Guys who usually say this,

    • Dont want to be tied down to one woman and are afraid of commitment cause either for one they just got out of a heartbreak and don't want to experience that again or they haven't got a lot out of there system and want to play around with woman without a Girlfriend in the way. overall, because they are not serious.

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