I just had oral sex for the first time last night and I’m a Christian... I don’t feel guilty?

So I never wanted to have sex before marriage. I believe it’s wrong.. I’m 19 years old and have refrained from it. But last night while I was with my boyfriend (who’s also a waiting Christian) we were both topless making out and I was kissing his chest. I ended up kissing his abs, and I touched his dick and rubbed it with my hands. He was so hard and then he asked if I would. I was hesitant at first but then I just went for it. We didn’t do it to finish, he stopped me before he came but I sucked on him for a good 10 minutes. I don’t feel guilty at all even though I’ve believed this whole time it was wrong to perform oral sex outside of marriage... Should I feel guilty? Is it a sin? Is it natural?

(Please no judgement or hate about my faith)

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  • I hold no judgement or hate towards you or your faith. To truly believe an action was "wrong", you would feel guilt after violating such a belief. Considering a belief is apart of the foundation of a person.

    Allow me to explain how this works:
    There is a difference between believing "morals" and understanding "rules". I feel that you understand your faiths "rules" and you rationally recognize how the community labels it "wrong", your mind even processes that they label it as part of their faith in order to belong. BUT You do not take this "rule" to heart in the form of truly believing because when a person violates their own belief, it feels as though you are ripping apart of yourself and defiling yourself- in the form of guilt and shame.

    Therefore, you are simply labeling yourself a christian but now you do not even follow or practice their beliefs. This does not make you wrong or right, this just means that your beliefs don't align with christianity. Try not to judge yourself. Sexual desires are natural- It's encouraged in christianity after marriage. They promote marriage first because with sexual desires come huge responsibilities and risks- which is easier to avoid when you don't expose yourself to those tempting desires.

    So basically, good luck trying not to give in to your sexual desires anymore... Once start, you are at risk of becoming addicted and wanting to explore. Especially, if both of you are not committed to each other through marriage... Which marriage, alone, doesn't guarantee relationship success. Only good character ensures success, which is built through practicing your faith in handling the challenges in life that is thrown at you- practicing self control. You only need to worry about maintaining self control, IF you are trying to be active in practicing your christianity belief. If you're not, then you are not and you can worry about it later. No one is perfect and their is a lesson to learn from every experience. Good luck sweet heart!

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    • 3d

      This was such a heartfelt response!!! Thank you so much for your comment. I will try to hold myself to my Christian beliefs and practice my self control. Thank you :)

    • 2d

      Just remember, you don't HAVE to do anything you don't want to. It's better to live a life from your heart where you can live your truth and gain your own unique experiences to learn unique lessons from your own life. Don't be too hard on yourself. Just recognize the reality around you so you can recognize what is true for you.

  • Guilt and sin depend on your religious beliefs. We have no idea what those are, and even if we did, would your religious leader tell you to base your beliefs on whether something is a sin on the words of a bunch of strangers talking about sex on the internet?

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  • Don't worry. You didn't commit any sin. You want to stay a virgin until you get married, you did not had sex, you are still a virgin. No need to feel guilty. Both can give pleasure to each other using oral. If you want to restrain from it from now on that is your choice. But you didn't went against your religion. So if both liked it I don't see why not keep doing it

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  • A side question: have you ever heard of a loophole?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NicfLmpYuy8

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  • It not a sin. You shouldn't feel guilty expressing your sexuality with someone you love. Along as you feel comfortable.

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  • Why do you think you should feel guilty? I don't see a reason for it.

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  • Yes, it is a sin. Go ask for forgiveness and avoid the near ocassion of sin.

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  • didn't your god make you a free person to make your own decisions?

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  • Yes, it is sex. It is a semantic game to parse it otherwise.

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  • Please point to the bible passage which says oral sex is a sin.

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    • 3d

      sex between two people not married and Oral Sex is sex hence the title. You look like a Pope , you should know that. I point to 10 commandments , where it says sex outside of marriage is adultery. If you ever read the bible like you should have , you would know. Ignorance = death.

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    • 3d

      @Poormanscomedian either way, you're not getting your info directly from the bible. You're making it up for yourself or getting it from some human.
      I don't believe in the bible and I know people who do are usually idiots because they make up their own interpretations and ignore the parts they disagree with, like you.

    • 3d

      I said you dont and where you are heading , dont try to tell God , no one warned you.

  • Wonder if it's the same for sex too.

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  • It's life I guess.

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  • It is sex and yes a sin, lust is lust.

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  • If god hated sex he would not made it so good.

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  • Good there is no GOD all made up crap

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  • you are already married

    READ THE BIBLE AGAIN
    he is your husband now lol

    YOU CAN'T LEAVE HIM
    good luck lol ahahahahaha

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    • 3d

      I mean we’ve already planned to get married so that’s not a bad thing in my opinion haha

    • 3d

      don't do it you are already married have fun and go at it
      but please no whoring around FROM BOTH OF YOU

  • Absolutely not, your human and you like to suck dick hell yeah

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