Do you ever feel like you should have died before now and somehow escaped?

So, I don't mean being depressed or anything, just that you changed long term plans and feel it may have saved your life. My example is that, from 13 to 18, I wanted to join the military or be a cop. Well, after I dropped out of high school, I got caught up in a relationship and with working. When I brought it up, she almost cried and begged me not to go, so I didn't. I had a lot of things going for me and I wanted to keep that up.

Anyway, by the time that relationship ended, I had developed back issues. A few years later I had my first back surgery. Now, I still deal with pain from nerve damage to my back, I smoke a lot more, and I just went through a cancer surgery. This led me to wonder if, maybe, there's a plan, fate, or an order of things that I screwed up by not joining the military and possibly die in the middle east.
Do you ever feel like you should have died before now and somehow escaped?
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