Guys Have A Harder Time Getting Sex?

Guys Have A Harder Time Getting Sex?

I post this myTake because I see a lot of guys being concerned about this, and I think I must be one of few who really doesn't think it's very hard. Although guys ask the question and hate it if it really is easier for girls to get sex, if you tell them otherwise it's like they still don't want to hear it, but I'm gonna tell it anyway.

The reality is that anyone can get sex pretty easily in these times, not just females. Guys hear from female friends how easy it was to sleep with a guy or hear stories of other girls who had the same success, so because they haven't had the same luck with a girl, they start thinking the problem is them because they're a guy. But it's not because they're guys, and not about their "approach," it's because they've already decided they're going to fail. Also, when you're actually trying to get laid, or being anxious about it, you can kill your chances, yeah.

Most females are also going to tell you they think it's easier for them to get sex based on the rate of guys who hit on them or guys who've actually offered them sex, or based on actual instances where they or another girl they knew really did ask some guy and got it, but most women don't have this success on a regular basis. It's a female form of bragging that is really no different than the kind that females themselves say they hate guys doing when it comes to sex. If women were trying to get sex from guys they wanted, it's usually going to be harder than getting it from guys who are offering, that's what women aren't going to tell you. I also think a lot of women say it's easier for them as a way to deflect from the still large and true fact that many of them have been pretty "easy" for a guy to nail, so they want it to seem like the cards are in their favor instead, more than they really are.

Guys Have A Harder Time Getting Sex?

A harsh reality is that females do give sex to males a lot easier than they want people to think but they try to ignore that fact. That's just the truth. All the talk of "standards" and looking for meaningful relationships is often times pretentious, idealistic proclamations more than is really the case. No doubt there are plenty of women who do hold on to those standards, but still quite a lot of women have slept with guys without the guy needing to do much to get it, and without her having any care about standards, and no care about their expectations in men either. Other theories float around that females are less receptive to casual sex than men, worry about a guy violating them, or don't think the instant sex will really be that great for her. And all of this is true, to an extent. Just because 1,000 females weren't receptive to casual sex or had worries, still doesn't mean 1,000 or 10,000 more had those same concerns like studies and research try to tell you. There are actually a lot more women in these times who have no problem with hopping in bed fast, and with little care about their safety or a relationship.

I was so glad when the Whatever channel on YouTube did a do-over of the girl Andrea asking guys on the street for sex at random last year. In the first project from 2013 she asked 14 guys and 7 said yes, and the project chalked her up as an instant winner, compared to their test with Robert Lewandowski, who asked 200 girls and got 0, although the way he asked seemed to be more of a joke, as if the producers set it up to be that way anyway. But when they tried again with Andrea asking 100 guys, 70 turned her down. That's a big number. A lot of people who saw the first viral video took it as fact, but the second one showed us some truth. Seriously, what guy is actually going to oblige some girl on the street asking him for sex at random? That's going to raise an alarm for most of us, not be a dream come true, because most females don't and wouldn't do that, so we're going to think something is fishy about one who's bold enough.

Guys Have A Harder Time Getting Sex?

I myself have asked lots of women if they think they could get sex easy if they asked guys (as part of my own social research for my writings) and many say yes, but when I ask them what they think their success rate would be, most start going, "Well, I think it would depend on my surroundings and what type of guys I ask and where..." So which one is it? You either think you can get laid easy or you don't. If you're going to break it down to demographics and location, then you obviously don't think your self-proclaimed feminine sex appeal will work with just any man or even the majority. And really, if women did start walking around asking guys for sex and thinking they can get it, it would actually make sex even easier for guys to get. So when females think it'd be easy for them, they would really be doing a guy a much bigger favor.

In truth it's not really that hard for guys to get sex. Women often depend on looks to attract men, while men don't need them. Guys I've thought to be ugly have gotten laid easy and repeatedly and made me scratch my head. And male charm still works to get plenty of girls in bed. If it was really that hard for guys to get laid then you wouldn't have so many females complaining about how a guy used them or "persuaded" them into sex, blaming him for her weak resistance and standards. STDs also wouldn't be as highly common as they are, neither would unwanted pregnancies. And parents wouldn't be trying to warn their daughters of a guy trying to get them into bed. That pretty much says a guy's ability to get what he wants is more forbidable than we portray it. I also think the idea that it's harder for guys to get laid is generated more and more in these times as a way to lessen male prowess, if you will, and psychologically make him think he has little control over the "playing field," even though he doesn't.

Guys Have A Harder Time Getting Sex?

I've read the studies and tests like the classic "Russell Clark experiment," and they don't really mean anything on the grand scale of things at the end of the day. Trying experiments like those on college campus will only get you facts for that demographic and atmosphere, but doesn't go for the rest of life. People also tend to use bar and nightclub scenarios and the Internet to gauge a guy or girl's success at getting laid, and it's just not the same when you apply it to other areas of life. There is a different kind of atmosphere, tension, and expectation in a bar or club that is not the same as being at a bus stop, work, grocery store, mall, etc. While there are cases of guys who struggle to take a girl home at a club while the girls are taking their pick, there are also cases ( - and I know these very well - ) of guys who go to the gym and are already about to nail the fifteenth girl who goes there too. And in turn there are women - some very attractive - who can't seem to get their male co-worker or neighbor to sleep with them. The situations become different and more realistic when you get it down to everyday life.

Females are sexualized more than males and depicted as more desirable, so we're already taught not to think or notice how guys can get sex. We're not supposed to believe guys who talked to a girl once and got laid the next moment. We're not supposed to believe the ones who talk about many different women they've slept with. And we're not supposed to believe that guys themselves have actually turned down women who were looking for it. We're trained to think all this is "rare" when it actually goes on a lot more than we want to think.

So I won't say it's easier for a female to get sex, but I certainly wouldn't say it's harder for a guy either.

Guys Have A Harder Time Getting Sex?
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Fully disagree. Women hands down get sex easier if they choose to. They even get their sexual needs filled entirely if they choose to more than men. All they need to do is choose. Many men don't have this choice. most guys are getting sex, but it's with that one they settled for kinda thing. Why can prostitutes demand such high prices? Supply and demand pal. Enough said. Also I could take even a hot guy and make this challenge: who can bed 50 partners the fastest? The majority of women would slam this guy. I mean, my one friends with benefits gets like 3-4 fuck requests weekly. Nah, women win in this department, it's a fact.

    • Not really. It's about your mindset. Prostitutes make money because their services are very accessible for men. If male prostitutes for women were more common and women were encouraged to use them more, they'd be just as successful really. Women can choose from guys THEY KNOW want to have sex with them, but to go out and choose the ones they actually want, is a little trickier. I don't think that many guys are settling for sex with one girl, seeing as many guys have other girls "on the side," that they're girlfriends or wives find out about.

    • my mindset? Sorry how does evidence that contradicts your view point make it my mindset? You really think it's accessibility that separates a female prozzie from the rest lol? Considering you are the first one to say it's easy for males? Male gigalos are not wanted because they are not needed. Why do you think Ron Jeremy says, for a male to make it into porn, you need a girl on your arm? Because men are not needed. Try get into a swingers club.:. a single male can't (or has to pay through his arse) why? Because males are not needed. There is something in the open sex world called poly saturation. It's almost an exclusive male problem where one girl has to many boyfriends and can only see so much leaving other men out. Online, offline, I can go on forever. But even in your take, you seem to ignore evidence to make it fit your viewpoint. Does my friends with benefits sex example not make it clear enough?

    • No, I haven't ignored the "evidence," I clearly stated that it just doesn't add up. Again, you're talking about porn, clubs, and prostitutes, all things that don't apply to the much larger every day life. There are plenty of guys having fwbs, but we're not supposed to think they're that common.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Girls can get turned down when they go for guys that happen to be virgin or loyal boyfriends or way way hotter than them.
    I heard of a girl who tried to hit on a bunch of my male acquaintances and always got turned down. I pity her, because they made a running joke out of her.
    Another male friend turned down a girl who liked him (I disagree though that the signs he listed was a clear sign that she wanted his dick lol) and I didn't understand why, because I thought she was cute. I think it's because he was a virgin and wanted his first time with a girl he truly liked.

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What Girls & Guys Said

2 20
  • This is a very well written discussion of the subject and you made some excellent points. Guys make this argument to justify or excuse why they are not getting laid, but they ignore a simple truth. Assuming that we are talking about a heterosexual population: if there are 1,000 girls who decide they want to have casual sex tonight, they will need to find 1,000 makes to participate in the casual sex. Tonight, just as many guys will be "getting lucky" as will the girls.

    The response of the whining males is that there are a few guys who get all the women. If those 1,000 girls want to have casual sex tonight, very few will hook up with a guy who has sex with two different women in the same night. The same 1,000 guys will not move on and all score tomorrow night with a different set of 1,000 girls.

    This entire issue rests upon a foundation of people not being honest about their sexual behavior and beliefs.

    • Sir, if Takes had Most Helpful Opinion option, I would most certainly give it to you. Well said!!!

    • Thanks!

    • If there are 1000 girls looking for sex, and there are 1500 guys looking for sex. Sex is hard for the guys because some guys will have no luck.

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  • Just to get sex for the sake of sex would be easy, but here's the thing for a guy to get an erection he has to actually be attracted to the woman. I was so horny a few years ago after a six year relationshit, that I pulled a few women that I wasn't even that attracted to for the sake of getting laid. It was immature, I told them my intentions before we did it, they didn't care... but they started to, and it became less enjoyable anyway so I stopped seeing them.

    So, there I was a late bloomer to the dating world, because I got into a long term relationshit too quickly with the wrong woman. I went out and saw that the pond has dried up and that I had wasted my time, too late.

    So, yeah I think its harder for guys to get find a descent woman they are actually attracted to who also likes them, but that doesn't answer your question... but sex for the sake of sex? I'm not sure it is harder, a guy could pay I suppose - which wouldn't answer your question though.

    • Lol "relationshit" Cute.

    • You either didn't read the whole Take, or you already decided there wasn't going to be much value to it. The point here is if a woman actually TRIED to get sex, it wouldn't really be as easy as we think, compared to choosing from the guys who she knows want to sleep with her. And in some ways obtaining sex is easier for a guy than it is for a girl.

  • Lol I have no trouble at all getting sex. Generally I can have sex with most women I want. But that's because I'm smooth as fuck and have a lot of experience picking up women.

    • And that's really all it takes, which is what I'm trying to explain to all these other insecure cocks on here.

    • You can lead a horse to pussy, but you can't make him eat it. Or so they say lol

  • some interesting points to a relatively pointless post.

    the trick to getting laid whether a guy or girl is,

    1. you go out of the fucking house.
    2. pick a fucking target.
    3. fucking attract the target
    4. fuck the target

    *no applause necessary*

    ok between 3 and 4 i have like 25 steps but my point is the people complaining they aren't getting laid arnt going out and trying. theyre making excuses and failing from the start

    • I agree with you.

    • But those attraction steps is the deal breaker. The other problem I have with this is that although you are right, it's still easier for a girl. One x Online profile is all she needs. Whereas a guy like me who goes out to get laid has to put in effort. I wanted to release my music album for example but I put it on hold because of women. Women however could still do their thing and get laid because it's that easy.

    • @Scrambledagain So first you say I'm right, but then say you still think it's easier for a girl. So which one is it? Just because one girl here is getting sex at a time that you're not doesn't mean it's harder for you or easier for her. This is the problem with us guys: we keep looking at a woman who's getting laid and thinking it's just because she's a woman.

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  • I think in a stereotypical sense it is easy for guys to have female friends and easier for females to get sex.

    So it really balances out.

    I don't ever take youtube vids like that as fact. Even when the guys are pulling pranks on girls (not including the social experiments) I still take that with a grain of salt. A lot of that stuff I imagine is staged.

    Really a guy just has to be the right kinda guy for that particular girl. There are girls who would turn their faces in what I imagine is disgust at me. There are girls who thought I was just so-so. Then there are other girls who were so thirsty for me that it creeped me out. You could see the painful frustration in their eyes as they yearned for me.

    You made really good point about atmosphere. You're right. Atmosphere and expectations are important here. At bars and clubs of course guys there are looking for sex, but typically the females are looking for it just as much. Obviously there are more guys approaching females there as well. This is a cultural, atmospheric, thing though. In the general world the numbers so to speak are going to be different.

    The internet especially. High quality photos. Photos that show multiple interest. I mean when it comes to that kinda thing it's like a guy has to be a superhero with multiple occupations and a Peter Parker esque photographer taking the photos.

    In real life it is vastly different. Online hardly any girls care to pay me much attention. In real life though? I can't go anywhere in a group of a lot of people without girls showing some interest in me.

    Your last point hit the nail on the head

    d.gr-assets.com/.../9546884.gif

    No but seriously it did. Women are sexualized more than men... that's not a word, but it's true. In everything that is media and social relationships and sex is always a topic with women. Right behind that is children. So often times due to this people overhype different aspects of sexuality among females. One of these being sexual availability.

    • Exactly. And, yeah, 'sexualized' is a word, friendo. :-)

    • Oh alright lol.

    • @Joc4Position - "Online hardly any girls care to pay me much attention." Suggestion- Upload an actual photo of yourself. :P

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  • Lol no

    • You're just wrong. If you aren't hot, it's not easy.

    • For a guy, he could probably get laid very easily if he dropped his standards to a point that most reasonable people just wouldn't accept. A girl likewise could get laid very easily but while she may or may not have to lower her standards, she could still have reasonable standards and get her way. Any average girl can find a 6 or 7 who would be willing to fuck her with no difficulty. A guy of equal relative attractiveness would probably have to lower his standards to a 4 at best in order to find sex with the same lack of difficulty.

    • You either didn't read the whole Take, or you already decided there wasn't going to be much value to it. The point here is if a woman actually TRIED to get sex, it wouldn't really be as easy as we think, compared to choosing from the guys who she knows want to sleep with her. And in some ways obtaining sex is easier for a guy than it is for a girl.

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  • I don't know any guys irl who can't get sex.

    • Precisely.

  • If you're hot, having sex is pretty easy

    • That still depends on who thinks you're hot. A hot, sexy girl to 30 guys can still just be "Meh..." or not special to 30 other guys or more. Hotness/sexiness/beauty is subjective. Often times girls who my guy friends thought were hot were nothing special to me, and ones I thought were hot weren't special to them either.

    • True! agree

    • As a society, but especially as guys, we have GOT to deprogram ourselves from the faulty logic that if we want to sleep with a woman we think is hot that it automatically means all other guys want to sleep with her too. It just doesn't work that way.

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  • It sucks because we're expected to have money, a car and the magical personality that will charm a specific woman.
    All a woman needs is to be hot and she can get laid any time.

    Which is exactly why prostitution should be legal.

    • and even when they might want to get laid , they are very subtle.

  • Yes, guys have a harder time getting sex. That's not even a matter of debate. The imbalance arises from one simple factor: the male sex drive. Women experience nothing remotely like it, so they have only a fraction of the male desire for sex. As such, they are willing to be far more selective in who they agree to meet for sex. By contrast, the majority of *younger* men will stick anything that weighs significantly less than 200 pounds. So an average woman ends up having a lot more options than an average man, because the demand among men for sex is so much greater than it is among women.

  • An old saying I saw playing CoD 4:
    "A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is brave five minutes longer."
    Ralph Waldo Emerson

    I believe that's true in life. All any guy needs to do is be brave, not more confident, nor more better looking, or anything. Yes, it helps to have that but it's a multiplication, not an addition and anything times zero is zero.

    • Well said!

  • I'll go outside tomorrow and say yes to the first offer.

    Oh wait, I'm male.

  • Think you're forgetting the fact that women garner much more attention from guys than vise versa. Guys have a harder time getting laid because we're assumed to take the role as the initiator. It doesn't bode well for the majority of us who either lack confidence, are introverted and / or shy.

    I've created a fake female profile on a dating site a while back just to gain perspective. I got hundreds of messages the first few days of making it.

    Women are in an abundance of attention while us guys are the opposite.

    • I didn't forget it. Guys don't need attention in order to screw a girl. I think it's the girls who need attention.

    • Girls get attention thanks to the social norms we've developed. Many of us guys do need attention right back though for the fact that most of us don't have the social skills or motivation to approach.

  • I ugly for female friends so I'm not getting sex

  • nonsense, I definitely cannot get laid, I'm not even going to try. Unless you're super good looking/hot or have a good height you can't get laid easily

    • Dude, you have FEMALES themselves saying it's not true.

    • I can only speak from my experience though. I can't get laid so I give up lol

  • i do agree with some of points you mentioned , of course not all women are that hard to get into bed, but sometimes your sorroundings coupled with a really limited time and bad luck can fuck you up... for example take me , a tall, good looking , smart, funny guys with a good body i've had a relationship with a girl before and dated another one , both were pretty, nice and overall good , one was kinda manipulative but couldnt really get into her pants , she did seem really sexually aroused so many times but nothing happened absolutly nothing not even a kiss, my friend even tried dating her and he succeeded in making her liking him yet nothing happened she broke up with him after 3 months when he mentioned sex and found her another dude... i then met another girl, she seemed nice, caring and fun to hang out with, she had deep feelings for me and really liked me , i liked her as well not as much and i stopped being too nice like with the first girl and upped my game emotionally and physically , acting all charming and sexy and kissing her, on the lips neck and even kinda her chest , she was so horny and shaking with pleasure i thought " damn i hit the jackpot , she's nice and i like her sex should be great" then she hit with the " i dont really want sex i want to wait for marriage " ... needless to say i was kinda dissapointed i made her so horny on many occasions, looked my best everytime nad was charming and she does this? and thats when i started to wonder what the hell is going on , these two girls also commented on how smart and good looking i am, didn't help though.

    So now i am at college wanting to get laid but all girls who are 6+ are taken , iam not exaggerating , some i found out on my own and some told me themselves , and they were all giving me signs of attraction and looks , so here i am a young guy who is trying to get laid and failing so badly at it , is it my fault? I don't know maybe but looking at my situation i keep wondering how am i supposed to have sex /

  • So if this is the case why is it I'm 24 and never had sex

    • Just because you haven't doesn't mean the same thing is happening to all other guys.

    • Thanks that just made me feel worse about myself

    • Send me a message, we'll talk about it.

  • Men can get sex. Of course. Women get a lot of offers to have sex. I agree, especially on this site, some make it sound like it is impossible for men to get sex. Men can get sex and it is not some mysterious elusive thing that some like to proclaim it be at the end of the day women want sex as well. Also women cannot get sex with every random man she sees

  • Then hookers and escorts would be less common if that's the case and Valentine's day would not be as profitable. If YOU believe that you can somehow "Confidence" your mind and way into getting laid then that's you. A guy I knew that always kept a woman around said it was never confidence that got them. The woman found you attractive and lots of guys will mistake that for "confidence" and run with it.

  • you must be blind. there are millions and millions of men that can't get laid. no confidence, religious beliefs, no social sharpness, bad hygiene, poverty, perversion, retardation etc. in fact most men that where born in the history of humanity died virgins.

    with my confidence not even a gazillion years. it seems completely unfathomable.

    many men dont just want to get laid. they might be in love with a specific unattainable girl, or want something serious to marry. not give it to the first that opens her legs to him.

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