Sexual Relationships
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Do Women Have It Easier Getting Laid Than Men?

Do Women Have It Easier Getting Laid Than Men?

When it comes to being able to get laid, women in general hold the most power (as to whether that happens or not). Most women, don't have to initiate a conversation with a man in order to capture his interest for a one-nighter. All we have to do, is put on clothing that flatters us, style our hair, and the power is all ours, when we enter into a nightclub with pure intent to get laid.
Our looks that attract will have a flock of men noticing and approaching us.
Why do women hold so much power? We do, because there's a old fashioned mentality circulating in this world, where men have to be the aggressors. They have to go after what they want.
Although times are changing, and women are finally stepping up there's still a fair amount of people set in that mentality.
When a man finally builds up enough courage to pursue the woman of his interest, it is our choice as to whether we give that man the green or red light.
Most men are in a situation, where they have to have confidence and courage, to walk up to a girl and attempt to make things happen. If a man lacks this courage, most likely he will be overlooked by tons of women. He will have a hard time getting laid!
If a man is extrememly unattractive and in combination with that, does not know how to talk to women he is at a huge disadvantage, unless he works on the way he expresses himself towards the opposite sex.
I've seen very unattractive women be able to get laid.
They don't have to be the smartest, the best dressed, or the most lady like but it's still easier for them
as opposed to an unattractive man.
The sole fact that the ball is most likely in their court, is again what gives them the power.
If the shoe was on the other foot, and we lived in a society where men typically had to stand back and wait to be interacted with at social settings, i would say men have it easier getting laid.
But until then this view point stands.

What do you think?


1 9

Most Helpful Guy

  • I think it is much easier for women to get laid then men, but it's not because of societal rules about who should approach.

    It's that men, as a group, are much more interested in casual sex even with women who are less attractive than themselves, then women are. Men are also much more likely than women to view having sex with a large number of different women as a 'plus'.

    Because of this, there's a huge supply of men interested in having casual sex relative to the supply of women interested in having casual sex. A woman who is a '5' can literally just post online that she'd like to have sex, and she will get a pile of offers. A man who is a '5' and posts that online would be unlikely to get any.

    Women have high standards for a man they'd just hook up with (appearance wise) while men will -drop- their standards to get sex.

    To top it all off, i'd suggest that historically, women were less likely than men to opt for casual sex even if a desireable partner was available. That's probably still true, though the gap has narrowed. This one is primarily about social pressures and 'slut shaming', though also a little bit about perceived safety.

    But mainly, it's just supply and demand.

    • this^^

    • I think more women than you think are interested in causal sex. It's the fact that we automatically get labeled as a "whore", "slut", or "prostitute" that most women try to compress it and act as if they're not like that. But a lot of women are they just won't admit to it.

    • I don't disagree with you at all. I can perhaps be more clear: I think many and perhaps most women are interested in casual sex with the right guy. By contrast, I think many and perhaps most men if they haven't gotten laid in a few weeks are interested in casual sex with a slightly ugly and overweight woman who is cheerful and DTF. I also agree with you that slut shaming discourages women from pursuing the casual sex they want (though less now then in most of the past). But women, free to sleep with who they want, don't en masse just start trying to run up their numbers by sleeping with as many average guys as possible.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Women may be able to get laid easier. Though sadly men have it a BILLION times easier when it comes to being satisfied from sex. Women majority of the time tend to not be 100% satisfied and stuck still feeling horny and needing to be finished off.

    So honestly I think the not being able to have satisfying pleasure from sex is worse than how easy it is to get laid. What's the point of having sex if it's not 100% full filling?

    • Yes but I feel that's because so many women put the burden of making the sex good completely on men. It's much easier to get yourself off than to get your partner off. Most girls generally are submissive in bed so they mostly just lay there expecting the guy to make things happen all by himself. If girls were more dominant in the bed like guys are they'd probably get off way more often. It's the passive behavior that is the reason the majority of the time that women don't get off at least from what I've observed.

    • @MyMintFrappe True that probably is another factor into it. Though for some it's also hard to reach orgasm with random people. Since some chicks unless they feel extremely comfortable with the dude. It's almost impossible for them to reach orgasm. Plus it takes more knowledge to know how to get yourself to reach it. With dudes they just need something to rub his dick and he will cum and feel awesome. For women we seriously need a blueprint showing where the correct spots are at. :D

    • Hi M/K, Could you expand on that? I am always careful to make sure my girl gets off b 4 I do. How is it that you don't DEMAND satisfaction? Also, what would be needed to "finish you off", if your guy is already deflated? thanks

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What Girls & Guys Said

16 63

  • I think it's one of those things that changes with time. I don't mean time in society, but time in a person's life.

    When boys are younger, they are surging with the highest levels of testosterone (and more importantly "free testosterone") they will ever have in their life. At the same time, girls are at their youngest and most fertile (and most attractive). Add to that the fact that the male culture of "my cock is bigger than yours," with boys trying to fight for social dominance and symbolic "rights of passage," and "sex" is not so much about girls, as much as it is about "proving to yourself that you're:" (a) a man, (b) capable of getting laid, (c) attractive to the opposite sex, (d) worth another person's time, (e) worth multiple people's time, (f) worth "attractive" people's time, and (g) are "therefore" very valuable.

    Unfortunately, this all happens at a time where the female's "sexual" value is at her highest, and the male's "partner" value is at its lowest. In most cases, he's nothing but a student. No social status. No income. No assets. No power. So, both sexes end up growing and developing with the temporary illusion of a skewed power dynamic were "women" are the choosers, and "women" hold all the sexual power.

    As someone who works on the legal end of construction, I've learned a thing or two about "the Golden Rule." He who has the gold makes the rules. Subcontractors don't set the terms. Owners set the terms. Why? Because there are hundreds of Subs dying to do work for money. But there's only one phallic-looking object that needs servicing. So, the lowest, cheapest, easiest most hassle-free bid usually wins (unless she's uninsured or has incompetent workers).

    As the sexes get older, and by older, I just mean over age 25, the "high school" sexual dynamic changes dramatically. All of a sudden, men are tired, stressed, and older. Their testosterone is taking a nose dive. Women are older, less attractive, and feeling the pressure to get married, have babies, and feel secure and like their life is moving. The solution to their problems are (as much as they don't want to admit it) - men. Men hold that power over them. A guy can jerk off and get the satisfaction of sexual release. A girl can't "stimulate" being married, having a family, having more financial security than a single person, etc. She "actually needs" a man (if she's hetero) to have those things.

    The irony is, at that point, what do men really want any more?

  • I think there are a few facets to this issue, but I do think you've correctly identified one of them.

    You're right, part of this is due to social norms that more or less require men to be the aggressor. If you think about this from a numbers standpoint, it makes perfect sense. A guy only has a chance with the women, he himself has the confidence to talk to, regardless of how many women are actually present in the room. A girl on the other hand, without any effect still theoretically has a chance with any man standing in the room. Her efforts do not effect her theoretical odds.

    If a women walks into a club with 100 men, she only needs to have a 1 of those 100 men to approach her to get laid. In other words she can succeed even with 1% odds. If a man on the other hand only talks to 1 out of 100 women, he has to bat 100% to get laid.

    Also the sheer dynamics of this put the work and the pressure on the shoulders of the man. Similar to a job interview, the interviewer has the power by default. The person being interviewed has the pressure. They're actions determine the outcome of the interview, not the actions of the interviewer. This is the same when it comes to our dating dynamics. The woman's actions, by nature of her role in the dating game are more or less inconsequential.

    The other aspects to this is biological. Put more simply, you could argue men have a higher sex drive. Now I wouldn't necessarily go as far as using a blanket statement like this, as I like to think of it as men and women having different sex drives, not bigger or smaller sex drives. Women are obviously a lot more cautious about who they have sex with and whether they realize this or not, this is partially because of biological conditioning. Subconsciously women know they have more at risk. They can get pregnant, and if they do, they are sidelined from being able to reproduce for 9 months. A man doesn't have this issue. He could impregnate 100 women in a week if he wants to. Because of this women are more selective about who they decide to have sex with.

    I don't think you'll ever completely reverse this, as much as a man I of course would love to see that. Mostly because the biological element is in our DNA and probably will not undergo and major changes any time soon. Our social dynamics are changing slowly, which I think will make it a bit easier for some men, but even then I think it's only the select few who will notice any benefit.

  • Ask pretty much any guy if they're cool with women approaching, and 90% of them will say "Yeah, totally." It's only religious zealots that maintain that traditionalist BS. I really don't think many people these days subscribe to the traditional "only males can approach".

    Who is the aggressor isn't the only factor. Female value is very, very high. Male social value is based on accomplishment. Now that women can also accomplish, that boosts their value up to where a man and woman of equal value are actually not of equal value: the woman is more valuable and will usually see her equal as below her. I'm not arguing against women in the workforce, not at all, simply stating how I see the cause and effect.

    So, an average woman, a 5, is worth a 6-7-8 male. Tack on some make up, and an average woman with a decent set of accomplishments is easily worth a 9. Meanwhile, a man who is a solid 6 is only worth a 3 or 4. There is a value discrepancy.

    Not only a hard time getting laid. One particular problem I've heard a lot of women bitching about is "This guy talked to me for an hour and didn't understand that I wasn't interested!" Like they can't just say "Hey, I'm not interested."

    I think that if women were socially determined to be the aggressors, a lot more men would not get laid. Because women would just choose the top ones. They wouldn't go out on a limb and get impressed by a guy they wouldn't have looked at had he not talked to her, or get the desire to learn more about a guy. They would judge more based on appearance. Mmm. Not sure about that, but it was my first idea.

    But there is also one concept that is missed in this "chicks have it easier getting laid". Sure, but they have it harder cumming. Women need intimacy for good sex, more often than not. And that is a lot harder to get than meaningless sex, for them. Women desire sex less than men. Or I guess I should say "a different kind of sex". So it somewhat balances out. But they still definitely have the advantage in dating and courting.

  • well... if this isn't a scoop of "obvious"...
    thing is... though ALL women have the power to get laid, there are still some that don't USE the power. its a shame really.

    • Yes, so obvious that I answered my own question. However, I am open to seeing what others think.

    • you said it all darling... there's nothing else to say... i just added the fine print.

    • Thanks for commenting

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  • It's easy for girls to get laid. To get quality sex however, is not as easy. So even if we get sex easily, it tends to be on the man's terms anyway. Like he will most likely just get himself off and that will be the end of it. in my opinion that barely even counts as sex, that's more like having a man use your body to masturbate.

  • Of course I agree with you because that is reality. By the way no one should ever think that a guy picks up a girl. They think they do but in actuality it is the female that allows herself to be picked up. A guy can stand on his head and spit gold bullion but it is still up to the female to say yes or no allowing the guy to pick her up or not. Twice in my life at a bar I have gone up a guy and said, "I find you sexually I'd love to have sex with you." Both times I was not turned down. I would like to add that in addition to everything the editor said guys are always, "on the hunt." A Friday night in a bar has many guys there single. I would say that 99.9% of those guys are on the hunt. 80% of girls are also on the hunt.. Guys fail to realize that overwhelming fact. They continue to believe that the girls are there to socialize or to cock tease. Of course some are maybe 10%. When I was in college many of my sorority sisters would go out on a Friday night. If we wanted to socialize we could stay at home in a beautiful sorority house. Cock teasing was frowned upon and considered stupid and immature. The conclusion as to why all didn't wind up bed with somebody was that the guys were too afraid of having their egos crushed if they were rejected. They didn't approach all of us. Hence they hook up and some of us also didn't hook up. But we were all there on the hunt and so were the guys. But again we were approached correctly interaction would occur. And yes it of course was easier for us. Because we were the ones in control. Again never think you're picking up a girl they are allowing you to pick them up.

    • "were approached correctly " What would be a correct approach?

    • @Bandit74 personality and the ability to hold a conversation with anyone of us. Self-confidence that is displayed. Not aggression but being self-assured not egotistical. Being funny finding humor in the whole situation. The correct approach is the approach for any interaction with a girl. There is no magic to it. No secret.

    • @SexyStudent "The conclusion as to why all didn't wind up bed with somebody was that the guys were too afraid of having their egos crushed if they were rejected." - This is common for females, you assume he wasn't interested in you guys because of that, never because he just wasn't into you. Bar and club scenarios are often used to explain the sexual availability thing, but don't apply to regular every day life. Since those places are usually where people go to pick up somebody, the situations are different. But try this at a grocery story, mall, bowling alley, bus stop, and the results are dramatically different. Anyone has the power to choose by saying yes or no, even men. So when women approach guys and he turns her down, he's got the same advantage. But that's not something most people will talk about.

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  • It may be easier for women to get laid but the repercussions and social stigma women receive from it outweigh men

    • Life is full of advantages and disadvantages. Can't have one without the other.

    • Nobody's gonna know who she has sex with unless she tells the world.

  • Count the number of brothels catering to men and divide by the number of brothels catering to women.
    You will have a ratio that can be used as an indicator

    This indicates that either women dislike sex hundreds of thousands times more than men, or find it hundreds of thousands times easier to obtain it.
    Or a combination of both.

    Literally and scientifically (measurably) , there are 5 orders of magnitude difference between the obtain-ability of sex for males and females.

    Observations of other species, also indicates that it has nothing to do with 'Society' and Traditions or stereotypes.
    But is more of an expression of inherent differences in Gender due to evolution.

    Next question.

  • Yes, it is much more easy for a woman to get sex than a man. It is not hard at all for women to get sex if she wants it. They say in New Zealand men have an average of 7 sexual partners in their life but women have an average of 20.4 sexual partners in her life. However, I do question those numbers because that survey was done by Durex and from what I see in society I just don't believe it.

    • I don't understand why there's a point four.

    • Well it is an average. So some women have had more sexual partners than that and some less and that is what the average works out to be.

    • Yeah, I see. What numbers do u think would be more accurate?

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  • Its not a question whether its easier for girls to get laid, its more about is that what women even want and do men now respect women who get laid easily?

    • That's a whole other topic. I think we all know the answer to those questions. I can discuss those things in an upcoming take to dig deeper on those issues.

    • @Ghosted Another issue people miss is that any sex a woman asks a guy for, still just really makes the sex even easier for him to get. Also, a bunch of guys could want sex with a woman, but if she tries asking sex from guys SHE WANTS, what will her success rate be? This is the difference. It's often time harder for women to get sex from guys THEY WANT, and aren't gonna tell you that. Whereas, men are still successful in the picking the women they want to sleep with because it's still seen as normal for a guy to do that, and women still want to be approached. Ultimately, I really don't think it's easier for women to get laid, and I don't think it's harder for men by far because you still have a LOT of easy women out there who give sex to a lot of men, and women pretend it's not true cuz it makes them feel cheap and pathetic, but it's a fact that still stands, yeah.

    • @ManOnFire Ah I whole heartedly agree with you. It is common that guys we don't like approach us. While the guys we like, if we approach we become disposable. It's a whole weird debacle-master plan we have to do to make ourselves approachable, with the right amount of interest so we give the right "signals" to the guys we like and most of the times two things happen: he is too dense, he is not interested. This is the society's acceptable way I would say women score in getting the guy they want 1 in 20 times.

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  • Thanks for the article. I really like it.

  • Is that even a question? If a girl says she is having a hard time getting sex, it means she is having a hard time getting money from a guy. (Could be a joke)

    "women are finally stepping up"
    Very few. But I must admit they're now so open in giving signs. Earlier tonight, I was in a party and I caught 3 girls checking me out. One even slipped on me. Maybe I was just misreading the things, but that's true that women are now at least trying a bit.

    Ah I'd sleep in a good mood tonight :D :)

  • Do Women Have It Easier Getting Laid Than Men?

  • In my location, there is a part of town - the Westside - in which the women have a reputation for being somewhat easy Louisey for ONS. If you are in a Westside bar around closing time, the standing joke is:

    Q. "What is the mating call of the Westside woman?"

    A. [spoken very loudly] "Whoowey, I SURE am drunk!"

    • You must have tons of offer then?

    • @This_is_my_username I don't gamble, I don't fight I don't be hangin' in the bars at night Yeah I used to be a fighter but Now I am a wiser man I don't drink much, I don't smoke I don't be hardly mess around with no dope Yeah I used to be a problem but Now I am a careful man. -- Jim Croce Like Mr. Croce said, I don't be hangin' in the bars at night. Actually, I rely primarily on internet sites to meet women, but I have been in an exclusive relationship for the past 9 months.

    • That is a good way to go! i hope all goes well in your relationship. :)

  • This is rhetorical, right?

    • I answered my own question as you can see I made this take in question form because I like to welcome opinions that agree with mine and those that differ. In other words , I am leaving room for discussion. You don't have to answer if you don't want to, which means not commenting :)

    • Your reply was as silly as your post lol.

    • What a low blow. Of course , this response is expected from a immature woman who takes offense. Goodbye

  • Read through all the comments and I would say @Alayio has it about right.

    I mean, let's face it, in general, it's not hard for either gender to get sex. Trust me, if you're willing to lower your standards far enough, you WILL get sex from SOMEONE. Most people don't like to admit that fact when they're boasting about their sex life, especially guys who boast about how many chicks they banged in a week, but it's true.

    But if I were to say who has the easier time, I would say females. But like Alayio said, that's NOT always a good thing if you sit down and think about it. With that power comes certain social stigmas, it's not the shining all encompassing super power that so many lonely and slightly/very misogynistic guys make it out to be, it's more like a double edged sword. One that a lot of guys fail to ignore.

    Guys don't seem to realize how much freedom they have in the sexual world. If the tables were flipped, imagine being a guy who loves sex, but the moment they have it, EVERY person and their mother somehow knows about their history and 1/3, maybe even 2/3 of every girl you meet would be disgusted to be with you. That's definitely not easy.

  • It is not even a question.
    100% of women that wake up and say "I want to get a cock in me today"... can. 100%
    men that want to get into a pussy have, at best, 50/50 shot
    that doesn't mean the woman will have her pick. but if she lowers her options far enough there will always be someone out there willing to fuck her.

  • They are also the ones who do any preparation around birth control & STDs. And have far fewer orgasms than men, despite the capability of greater sensation.

  • My only question is: Do women really choose?
    Maybe the most don't actually choose. They just pick the ones that choose her first.
    (ok, they choose within a population, but they don't freely choose)

    • I'm assuming that question is pertaining to the video, since CoreyWayne uses the word "choose". I'll agree with him, and say yes women choose because it's a "choice" as to whether she decides to sleep with that guy or not. if she didn't select him, then she's not choosing generally speaking.

    • Oh, sorry I'm with bad internet and couldn't see the video. I meant as in that the majority only choose out of the population that chose them in the first place. So they don't choose freely from the whole population, and just from the confined group that chose them before. But this was still an hypothesis, please comment (still can't see the video btw)

    • Not necessarily, a woman could walk into a place and if she's looking for sex, in seconds know what guy she's interested in to have sex with. If that guy shows her interest, its only fire works after that. A woman doesn't always necessarily choose someone because she has limited options.

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  • I see it as this and my friends have agreed that any woman can get sex when he wants but only a few guys have that luxury.

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