I Don't Buy 'Made to Penetrate'


This is going to be a controversial mytake and I'm going to be siding with the feminists for once, so better get things cleared up.

I Don't Buy 'Made to Penetrate'

There is something strangely erotic yet sinister about this image

Sure, there is such a thing as made to penetrate - it's entirely conceivable that under exceptional circumstances a man can be drugged up, tied up and forced into erection mode with viagra by some erratically kinky dominatrix he wants nothing to do with. But what we have to ask ourselves is, is this reality a regular phenomena?

I Don't Buy 'Made to Penetrate'

40% of rapists are women now? Better beware the rohl hypnol brandishing gangs of ovulating femdoms outdoors now, gents. Seriously, what percentage of these rape allegations by men against women were proven true?

I'm sorry but as a man, I just don't buy it.

Women are less physically strong and less aggressive.

Women are much harder to become sexually aroused and therefore less incentivised to initiate something like rape even if they could.

Women cannot get a man hard if he does not want to do it.

Women don't carry around date rape kits of viagra, rohl hypnol and handcuffs as far as I'm aware.

I Don't Buy 'Made to Penetrate'

Let's be honest now, while this would not be a realistic case of female on male rape (the woman would probably be a lot less desirable, as attractive as a life sized barbie doll is), it wouldn't be most guys worst nightmare, either.

So what does circulating this myth do?

1. It marginalises actual rape of women by men

2. It marginalises actual rape of men by men, e.g. in prison cells.

I can't stress how big of a problem both these things are. Women are much more easily raped by men than vice versa and is demoralising when it happens. Prison rape is a truly horrendous ordeal for a man and is no laughing matter. But prison rape is joked about by comedians all the time and the western countries do very little to remedy a very real problem - e.g. extra shower cubicles, private single rooms, more cctv surveillance of inmates AND guards etc.

I Don't Buy 'Made to Penetrate'

In short, if MRAs want to put emphasis on the fact that men can be victims of rape and sexual assault, they should focus on cases of rape where the man is the initiator, specifically in prisons where the majority of male on male cases happen.

I Don't Buy 'Made to Penetrate'
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Anpu23
    I was abducted, held for 3 days, and repeatedly raped by 3 women. I will tell you that a hard on is a biological response to stimuli, and is even corpse is capable of one, also it is a common response to fear to get a stiffy. I can also refer you to a case where a guy was PASSED OUT and a college girl went to his dorm, and gave him a BJ, then reported HIM for sexual assault and he was kicked out of the college for it (nothing happened to her). I can refer you to a case where a girl forced herself on a man, admitted it to his parents got pregnant and he is still forced to pay child support to his rapists.

    Just because the average man is stronger then the average woman doesn't mean that every woman is weaker then every man. Also the first reported sado-sexual killer was a woman (Elizabeth Bathory) who had hundreds of victims. You also did not take into account an armed woman vs an unarmed man. I could go on...

    Prison rape, prison rape as many people understand it is by and large a myth, and it's usually guards victimizing inmates not inmates victimizing each other. This is due to a number of factors, but one of the big one is the simple lack of tolerance between inmates of rapists, including prison rapists. And in many cases of prison sexual assault it's female guards who are the assailants. Further PRIA has been law now for almost 5 years, which is a set of laws expressly to combat prison rape, where a persons gender identity may help classify which facility they go to (yes under PRIA a biological man who identifies as a woman could end up in a woman's prison) .

    My situation, I spent the time in handcuffs, I was threatened with sharp objects if I didn't co=operate (including erections). And I carry restraint scars, and scars on my back from a household iron 33 years later from my ordeal.

    I will tell you that woman can and do rape men.
    Is this still revelant?
    • the_rake

      well that is a very horrible ordeal to go through. but more than anything it is the 40% rape statistics I am sceptical of. I concede that made to penetrate can occur in very exceptional circumstances (e. g. if the woman has the man drugged up, etc.)


      you say fear can cause an erection but I don't see how somebody threatening me with an iron could force me into erection mode at all (even if I wanted to in order to alleviate the fear). but then I have not experienced this first hand so I will say no more.

      that elizabeth bathory's victims were all women.

      some women are stronger than men, but I don't see that enough women could overpower men AND force him into erection mode to justify the 40% statistic.

    • Anpu23

      The statistic is in question, as they only sampled for the last year. As for the iron, it wasn't to get me hard it was to "educate me about the iron as a tool to demean and subjugate women" this lesson was while I was tied down and a shirt was ironed on my shoulders.
      For what it's worth fear is a strong motivator, usually they just threatened to castrate me (if you can't get it up, then I don't see a need for these anymore) And yes it worked.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Sara413
    I don't buy the 40% stat but do you honestly believe a man cannot be made to penetrate against his will? It is 100% possible to be physically aroused but not want it emotionally/morally/etc. Your opinion on this matter is one of the reasons it's so hard for male victims to come forward.

    By the way, contrary to your suggestion at the start of this my take, the opinions expressed are NOT generally espoused by feminists...
    Is this still revelant?
    • jacquesvol

      A man who gets physically aroused but not want it emotionally/morally/etc and penetrates despite not wanting it lacks self control.
      Do MRAs want to accuse women for men lacking self control?

    • the_rake

      I think a man can be made to penetrate under his will but only under very specific circumstances. for example this anpu23 guy is talking about such a rare (and horrific) case where he was handcuffed to a bed and held prisoner for 3 days. how many male on female rapes do you think are so well organised? no, most times a man rapes a woman it is very informal - he picks someone up kerb krawling or rapes someone in a back alley. for a woman to rape a man all kinds of other circumstances must take place, it seems.

    • Sara413

      I've heard of guys who woke up after a night of heavy drinking to fine a woman riding them that they'd previously turned down.

      Is it so hard to believe this stuff happens? I don't think it's as common as me on female rape, or even male on male, but it does happen and we need to create an environment in which males are comfortable coming forward and talking about what has happened to them.

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • aliceinwonderland69
    I have no idea whether it happens a lot. However, I do know of cases (first hand in my work) where a disable man has been overpowered by a woman and made to penetrate, although that is a strange way of phrasing it to my mind. He wasn't able to push her off and an erection is an involuntary reflex. I think this is, and should be, classed as rape. Men would have a hard time reporting because of feeling emasculated and because of this idea all men want sex all the time and they should be grateful.
    • the_rake

      but for him to be erect, surely he needed to be aroused?

      'Men would have a hard time reporting because of feeling emasculated'

      I get that.

    • Being aroused isn't the same as wanting to have sex. I can be aroused but still say no and that doesn't give someone the rigt to force me. If a woman says no it is still considered rape even if she climaxes during the attack,

    • the_rake

      I get that, but majority of the time you are not going to be aroused by your attacker because that's not really the way probability works. And the small number of cases where you would be it doesn't explain the '40% of rapists are women' statistic.

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  • WombRaider
    "Women cannot get a man hard if he does not want to do it." Bullshit.

    Where are your damn sources on these claims? I can't take anything seriously from anyone if you haven't include citations.

    Men are raped as often, if not more than women (SOURCE: ajph.aphapublications.org/.../AJPH.2014.301946

    Rape statistics tend to not include male prisoner rapes - go figures.

    Another SOURCE: www.slate.com/.../...n_are_sexually_assaulted.html

    As you can see, instances of male rape are underreported and therefore statistics are shunned.

    And yet here you are telling us you don't "buy" the 40% stat... well, you know what? It's 46% according to the U. S. Bureau of Justice Statistics.

    Source: https://jmm.sagepub.com/content/12/3/275.abstract
    • Original poster has been incinerated. Good Job @WombRaider.

    • the_rake


      there is this:


    • WombRaider

      Reddit isn't a source...

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  • Chief16
    If you have a genital, male or female, you can be raped.
    • IceEverest

      preach... But I didn't like the gif though lol

    • Chief16

      @IceEverest jk bro.

  • hellionthesage
    Amy schumer admitted to raping a guy who was blacked out drunk (she didn't use the term rape but thats what it was). In many cases the men where threatened by the woman stating that she would accuse him of raping her if he did not comply (which as your take pretty much makes clear she would be the one to believe not him) and in many many cases the man stated that he did not wish to hurt her because of him being physically stronger and the constant social conditioning and stigma of a man harming a woman. The fact is you completely ignore the emotional and social manipulation that goes into the rape of men, we are conditioned never to believe we can be harmed by a woman (neotenous biological traits as well as social conditiong) and that we can never harm a woman (again neotenous biological traits and social conditoning) which is what causes many of the rapes. You also ignored the several rapes by gun point which have occured: www.dailymail.co.uk/.../...steal-South-Africa.html
    Its actually kind of funny how in society we claim men and women are equal yet refuse to believe women are capable of doing any wrong doing and men the only ones. Not very equal view if you ask me and also very much informed by our society which constantly pushes the idea that women are victims and men perpetrators thus ignoring male victims and female victimizers in order to maintain the socially more acceptable idea that men are evil and women perfect.
    • Bandit74

      do you have the link about Amy Schumer raping a guy?

    • @Bandit74 thoughtcatalog.com/.../
      She was telling a story about her college days at some event and she stated she had sex with a guy who was blacked out drunk and did not give consent (according to her the guy didn't even seem to realize she was their) which is by definition rape (not unlike a date rape or using a drug to rape a girl. If the genders where reversed it would be unacceptable). So far as I can tell no legitamet news report has mentioned it its only when you actually here her story that you realize that she is describing a rape.

    • Bandit74

      I agree, if it were a male celebrity who told that story things would be completely different.

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  • gray_sailor
    Read the MHO for this opinion:
    It contains a first hand account of a man being raped by women.
    • Anpu23

      I responded to this my take as well, thank you for pointing him my direction.

    • @Anpu23

      You're welcome.

      After reading your account the first time, I feel obligated to respond whenever I see content such as is in this myTake.

    • Anpu23

      Thank you again

  • ObscuredBeyond
    "Made to penetrate", in my understanding, implies with use of drugs, like poisoning his food with Viagra and then blackmailing him. And yeah, prison rape is something that should never taken lightly. Especially if guards commit the rape. Laughing at a man for becoming Bubba food when all he is in for is being financially unable to pay a traffic ticket punctually? I consider that hypocritical of society. It's no wonder then, that so many of them become bitter, and are worse fits for society coming out than what they were going in.
    • the_rake

      '"Made to penetrate", in my understanding, implies with use of drugs, like poisoning his food with Viagra and then blackmailing him. '

      A lot of guys just seem to be talking about when they were in bed and she took advantage of the fact he was aroused or something. Even with viagra, my understanding is that this is not enough to force an erection.

      For example on some of these, the guys do not even mention being drugged, etc.:


      'yeah, prison rape is something that should never taken lightly. Especially if guards commit the rape.'

      Yeah, this is where I think the focus needs to be for male victims of rape (victims of male on male rape).

    • I was thinking more along the lines of sexual assault, where she poisons him to make him erect, grabs him, and lays on the pressure. In other words, coercion. Maybe not the same as rape, but still a bad thing. Especially if it's a teacher and a teen student being coerced by her. Though, I would think poisoning a man's food with erection drugs intentionally would constitute some sort of charge in and of itself.

    • the_rake

      It's possible I guess. I just have a hard time swallowing my own scepticism because of how well co-ordinated and thought out a genuine rape of male by female would have to be.

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  • fauchelevent
    I don't think you're really siding with the feminists here, dude.
    • the_rake

      well then you'd be wrong. feminism - it's etymological roots in 'femina', woman - is based on the principle that women are the subjugated gender in society, therefore in the interests of equality the rights of women need to be defended. if women were equally subjugated as men (e. g. if the 40% statistic were true) then it would be necessary for feminists to be equalitarians, not feminists. it is in the interests of feminists that I claim the vast majority of rape victims are women, because I am a reasonable person.

  • Remonster
    The essence here is much simpler: Don't get your facts from memes and infographics!
  • Noxifer626
    Why do you insinuate feminists don't care about men being raped?
    I certainly do, and made to penetrate does exist! Of course not to the level of men-raping-woman, but it does exist.
    • the_rake

      Depends how you define feminism. Usually it is MRAs drawing attention to the 40% stat. Feminists just want to pay lip service to equality so MRAs can't say they don't care about male rape.

  • SakuraCherryBlossoms
    40% does sound really high. Where did that statistic come from?
    • Anpu23

      It was a study by the CDC where they interviewed men about rape. and found this strikingly high number.

    • @Anpu23 Oh. Well, how many guys were interviewed? Like a percentage of all male rape victims I mean?

    • Anpu23

      A total of 14,155 interviews were conducted (7,758 women and 6,397 men)
      here's a link to the study if you want to read it.
      but it suggests that if you include the definition of "made to penetrate" the number of rape victims between men and women almost normalizes. There's another study that shows that women are as sexually aggressive as men I would have to dig it up though, but that study includes such things as steeling a kiss as a sexual predatory act. So you can take that for what you will.

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  • QuestionMan
    I don't think it's made to penetrate but more along the lines of drugged and used.
    There have been several reported cases, that I've read in which the woman subdued the male be it with drugs or physically and forced herself onto him.
    • What a bizarre article wtf.

    • Is this even real?

    • the_rake


      Yep, it can happen under very extraordinary circumstances

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  • Kylesar
    So getting hard is the same as wanting sex?

    That's like saying that women who get wet or climax while being raped secretly wanted it, and this isn't an uncommon thing
    No. It's a physical response to stimuli.

    You've never gotten a boner out of literally nowhere? So we wake up every morning wanting to fuck? NO. It's a physical response to stimuli

    I don't buy the 40% stat, but talking about male rape doesn't marginalize any other type of rape
  • gotc147
    This isn't a subject I'm heavily vested in, but I was under the impression that when men are raped they're the ones being penetrated, anally of course.
    • Anpu23

      there was a study by the CDC where they asked the question if anyone has ever made them penetrate another. It opened up a hole can of worms. Traditional rape is defined as penetration, so this created a new category.

  • WhaChaChaKing
    I'm a feminist and I definitely believe men can be raped by women. What makes you think feminist don't believe that?

    A lot of your points don't stand. Not all men have to overpower their victim so why do women? Also rape is usually about power not just sex so again your point is invalid. And I don't know about you but I can't help when I become sexually aroused and a lot of women that are raped manage to climax but that doesn't prove consent. It is possible and it does exist. To what extent I'm not sure.
    • Anpu23

      It was a staple of second wave feminism that women do not rape. That rape is a tool used by men to control women. Many prominent writers and activists have at one time or another stated that rape is purely a crime against women. I know that that has changed, but it was a belief in the feminist movement in the past.

    • the_rake

      many feminists stand against MRAs because promoting men's rights is seen as marginalising the issues women face in society. it is MRAs that argue in favour of 40%.

      the victim has to be overpowered or drugged. men's rapes just require a lot less planning and co-ordination. e. g. if a guy drugs a girl in a bar with rohypnol, it is easy to say she had too much to drink and carry her out. if a woman does the same (and usually they are not sexually motivated enough to do so), she is going to have to carry someone nearly twice her own size and weight. a guy can overpower a woman without drugs. the average woman is smaller and weaker so she will have a hard time overpowering the guy which means she will probably need to drug him and tie him up whereas most guys could just use brute force. and then the final hurdle for female rape is the erection problem.

      in short it is theoretical possible, just only in very exceptional circumstances - so not 40%

    • jacquesvol

      @WhaChaChaKing Men can be raped by women. Statutory rape is the most probable. Drunk guys are the other option.
      "I don't know about you but I can't help when I become sexually aroused"
      Then it's just a lack of self control.

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  • Spiorad_Aisce
    I must admit this is quite a new concept to me for a long time I was under the illusion that the furore about male rape was about anal rape not the "made to penetrate" rape. I suppose it comes down to your belief about biological response, if you believe a physically aroused woman can be raped then you must believe a physically aroused male can be raped. I have a feeling I read somewhere that during extreme terror an erection can occur (that is just something in the back of my mind, I have no proof).
    Genericising these types of assaults into groups and victims classes takes away from the terrible nature of the crime. Let each person feel comfortable enough to report the incident and let the authorities investigate each case separately away from any bias in society.
  • GreatnessRevamped
    TL; DC

    "Women are less physically strong and less aggressive."
    That's what drugs are for.

    "Women are much harder to become sexually aroused and therefore less incentivised to initiate something like rape even if they could."

    hahahhahhahaha hahahahah hahahahaahaha...

    Women cannot get a man hard if he does not want to do it.
    You must not have had morning sex.

    "Women don't carry around date rape kits of viagra, rohl hypnol and handcuffs as far as I'm aware."
    No, it's probably at her place, where the man followed her with the promise of something.
  • Panay
    I'm not convinced by the 40% figure either, but seriously? Men CAN be taped, but it's just not normally in the same way as women; usually it's through blackmail, threats with a weapon, or while unconcious (although I don't know how the whole errct thing works with that).
    And as a man do you never get erect when you don't want to? If women strip down in front of a man to fuck him, most men would get hard whether they want sex or not; and even if they didn't just touching him up a bit would probably get him up.
    And finally, circulating this kind of thing doesn't in any way marginalise women. All it does is raise awareness, since male rape is very rarely spoken of.
    • the_rake

      'And finally, circulating this kind of thing doesn't in any way marginalise women.'

      That's ok because that was not the intended goal :)

  • ChocoLada
    Damn, who stole my barbie doll? :P
  • Fortheholidays
    I had no idea, do you have any links of where you found this? Would make for an interesting read
    • the_rake

      yes, check out the conversation with womb raider. the webpage is reddit but the source comes from a conversation with NISVS debunking MRA interpretation of the so-called 40% stat from the CDC report.

    • Hey, thanks I will

  • jacquesvol
    I have a very sound mind. :D :D :D
  • Anonymous
  • Anonymous
    40 % never, some men are rape it's true but never this high.
    I have a hard to think how men can be raped by a weak women serious unless they are really drunk but still
    • the_rake

      I am glad somebody agrees with me on this. Most of the comments it is just people not liking the notion men are not raped as well because it offends their sensibilities.

    • Anonymous

      your welcome :)

    • the_rake

      there is an article I posted by NISVS in my discussion with womb raider debunking the 40% stat

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  • Anonymous
    Rape is really just non-consensual sexual intercourse or sexual contact. This can be initiated by anybody against another person's will, and any ongoing intercourse can lead to rape, if one partner revokes the consent but the other partner does not listen.

    You may think that men cannot be raped. But in reality, they can. A man and a woman may engage in intercourse in the woman-on-top position. The woman may sit on top of the man and move her body. Then, the penis snaps, leading to a penile fracture. The man groans in agony and begs the woman to stop, but the woman ignores and continues intercourse. Then, it's up the courts to determine whether the woman has become the rapist.

    Another example may be that the man is not in the mood to have sex. The woman is very horny and performs fellatio against the man's will. Rape. A woman may initiate sex on a drunk man. Rape.
    • the_rake

      'Rape is really just non-consensual sexual intercourse or sexual contact.'

      Actually, non-consensual sexual contact is just sexual assault if it does not include intercourse.

      As for rape, there is a discrepancy if the act of intercourse involves forced penetration with a penis or not. For example, in English law, a rape can only be committed by a male as the penetration can only be done with his penis. Anything else is sexual assault (e. g. forcefully penetrating a male or female with objects) but sexual assault can be committed by men or women.

      Even in US law it is just, “Penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim.”

      If you want to argue this definition, then ok fine but definitions that include 'made to penetrate' or 'penetration by object' are by no means the standard. The standard - and most commonly accepted - definition

    • the_rake

      ... is forced intercourse by penetration of the penis.

      You can certainly argue point out forcefully penetrating objects into a person's orifice is by no means consensual. However, 'made to penetrate' requires a non-voluntary erection. Erections typically only occur if the male is aroused and men actually have a certain degree of control: I would know that, being a man, it is possible to 'redirect' my thoughts to something non-sexual. Being a man, I also know that, anything that causes fear is likely to restrict my ability to perform an erection (which is why many first time lovers have a hard time with erectile dysfunction). I have never tried viagra personally, but I don't believe that erections are 100% involuntary with the stimulant. I think viagra would assist one's erectile capacity, but I think that anxiety or redirecting the thoughts to something non-sexual would destroy erection. But then I wouldn't know: I'll get back to you one day when I've tried viagra.

    • the_rake

      'The woman may sit on top of the man and move her body. Then, the penis snaps, leading to a penile fracture. The man groans in agony and begs the woman to stop, but the woman ignores and continues intercourse.'

      I believe that the excruciating pain from a penile fracture would be sufficient to prevent further erection. But if the woman deliberately caused a penile fracture and then attempted to force further intercourse, then you could certainly describe this as 'sexual assault' and grievous bodily harm (due to the pain of penile fracture).

      'The woman is very horny and performs fellatio against the man's will.'

      Sexual assault, not rape.

      'A woman may initiate sex on a drunk man. Rape.'

      If he is so drunk he is unable to physically resist, chances are he will not be able to perform an erection.

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  • Anonymous
    Blah blah... women get raped in prisons as well, and guess what now they are putting transwomen in female prisons. Second. men today like to seem like victims so that 40 percent I don't buy, sure men get raped by women and men out of prison. I know this as true, but instead of what you wrote coming off as educating. it just seems like you are whinning and want women to stop complaining about rape. Next time make it an educational thing not a " feel sorry for me ". And just to out this out their rape statistics for men include prison rapes, they aren't separate, that is why people don't consider them accurate
    • the_rake

      ' this just sounds like you are whining about male rape and want women to stop complaining '

      I'm really not sure how you got that impression since I spent the whole take debunking ' made to penetrate ' and then barely when skimmed over the topic of prison rape at the end though I did say it was a ' horrible and emasculating experience'. I never said that women can't be raped in prison.

    • the_rake

      * barely even skimmed *

    • She attacked a strawman, so there's no point in trying to reason with her. She has an agenda, and she will use smear tactics to try and fuk up your message.

      Should just flag her post and move on. I've already reported it.

  • Anonymous
    Sadly you are the reason female rapist get away with their crimes.
    I blacked out male can be raped by a female, a small or young male can be raped by a larger female, a male can be forced to penetrate with blackmail or other no physical tactics.
    A penis can and does get hard even if the male isn't "sexually turned on" (How are you even pretending that this is not true?)

    Your excuses are ignorant. I hope you or any potential child of yours never has to deal with the pain of being forced to have sex when they don't want to.

    You make me sick.
    • the_rake

      I said,

      'it's entirely conceivable that under exceptional circumstances a man can be drugged up, tied up and forced into erection mode with viagra by some erratically kinky dominatrix he wants nothing to do with.'

      what I also asked was,

      'is this reality a regular phenomena?'

      'what percentage of these rape allegations by men against women [the 40% statistic] were proven true?'

    • the_rake

      by the way in English law, only a male can rape because penetration can only be done with the penis: anything else is sexual assault. I am English by the way.

    • Anonymous

      Since male rape is so often ignored, ridiculed, or excused because of people who believe men can't be raped... it is hard to use the statement "how many of these 40% were proven true".
      It's also hard to count the accurate number of victims since most men won't come forward for these same reasons. It is likely higher than 40%.

      The legal term for rape is part of the underlying problem.
      Men's groups have been fighting to have "Forced to penetrate" added to the definition because having a one sided exclusionary term disregards HALF of the victims of a crime.

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  • Anonymous
    So two things. I agree with the 40% sounding like bullshit. I mean, if it is true that's horrible. But it sounds like nonsense. I do hope y ou actually checked the source though. Your take made it seem like you didn't. And if you're ignoring statistics without checking sources then shame on you.

    As for your conclusion? How the heck did a sensible person like you decide that ignoring half an issue is the best way to do it? It is an utter compromise and maybe its where things would end up, but you don't ask for the compromise from the bat. You ask for the whole deal then its up to see how much you have to give up.
    • Anpu23

      The source is a study by the CDC you can google it, it's refereed to in many articles and the study it'self is online.

    • Anonymous

      @Anpu23 I am obviously expecting him to check it, not me o. O

      I don't want to double check things if the mytake owner didn't check it himself!

    • the_rake


      yes, there are the CDC stats and I also found this article which debunks some of the CDC stats


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  • Anonymous
    This is one where feminists have expanded the definition of rape to include 'pressure' that really doesn't fall under legal coercion. Under that definition, men are often victims as well.

    Another question - if a sober person has sex with a drunk one, is that assault?

  • Anonymous
    Maybe women are less likley to violently rape a man. But it could be done in other ways.