The Reality of "Yellow Fever": Inside White Male/Asian Female Relationships.


The Reality of
John Lennon & Yoko Ono. A well-known example of a WMAF relationship, when the terms "Asian Fetish", "Yellow Fever" and "Weeaboo" aren't being hurled at me and my lady, we usually get compared to these two.

I met my future wife while I was studying abroad in Japan, back in '09 during summer break. I remember the day vividly. It was in the middle of June, humid as hell and I went on a trip with some of my local friends I made in college to a theme park, in the rural outskirts of Tokyo, called "Fuji Q Highlands". That's how I met Mei, she went with us as a guest because she's related to one of my friends' girlfriend at the time. It was love at first sight, the first time we met while we were packing our bags into the car, I was tongue-tied and I couldn't speak to her without embarrassing myself. But luckily, by the end of the day we were talking like old friends and our mutual friend took it upon himself to set up dates for us (becuase I was too shy).

Fast forward 7 years and were getting married this month.

I couldn't be happier.

The Reality of "Yellow Fever": Inside White Male/Asian Female Relationships.

Contrary to popular belief, most relationships like ours aren't born out of some sick fetish (yet, some unfortunately are). True, I've always been fascinated with Japan (I blame my childhood television viewing diet of Godzilla movies and Anime), I've always found the history, the culture and the people interesting, but I NEVER wanted to date Asian women exclusively because of my interests. I feel that it's wrong and detremental to the other person when he/she is pursued as a partner exclusively becuase of his/her ethnicity.

Prior to going abroad, the majority of my girlfriends were white like me and most of those were amazing girls that I was blessed to have in my life. I cherish those memories, but the one's I've been making for the last 7 years are my fondest.

In my fiance, I have found the most genuine, beautiful, kind and loving person anybody would hope to meet. The unfortunate stereotypes of Asian women, particularly Japanese women, do not apply to her. She's strong willed, independant and never takes "you can't do it" for an answer, she is in no way a "submissive geisha" at all nor is she a "dragon lady", those perceptions need to be smashed.

The Reality of "Yellow Fever": Inside White Male/Asian Female Relationships.

^This is not a pic of her, but of actress/singer Ko Shibasaki. But Mei does look very similar to this woman.

Like I said, she's the genuine article, the most real person I've ever met. I'm both blessed and privileged to have her in my life and that our relationship is built on love, trust, mutual respect and "give and take" compromise. We're a normal couple, just like most, aside from the ethnic aspects that shouldn't really matter.

However, we do get some barbs here and there, especially since she immigrated here 4 years ago. We've actually had a cashier at Dairy Queen REFUSE to write her name on the ice cream cake I got for her birthday, this was a middle aged woman who was obviously bigoted and upset over the fact that I, a white male of decidedly British/German stock, was buying a cake for a woman with a very Asian name. She, the cashier, actually stormed off after calling me a "rice fucker" of all things.

Keep in mind, I live in the mid-south, a stone's throw from Nashville, TN so there are A LOT of racists here. When we go to church together, people actually refuse to sit anywhere near us, the rednecks almost always feel the need to shoot their mouths at us and even some seemingly well educated young college "feminists" have felt the need to cut me down over my relationship.

It hurts, it's shameful, but we realize that it's part of it, especially where we live right now (we may move to Portland, Oregon sometime after we marry). Yet we realize that our relationship is considered more "acceptable" than other interracial couples. Other pairings obviously have it worse, imagine being the daughter of a KKK member in love with a black man.

I think part of the problem stems from the stereotype that exists regarding WMAF couples. Some people assume that I got with my fiance just becuase she's Asian and I have "Yellow Fever"... you can't be further from the truth.

While there are some relationships born of a shallow preference regarding race, most couples like ours prove that love transcends all boundaries, be it continental, cultural, racial or religious.

Peace out and Sayonara.

The Reality of "Yellow Fever": Inside White Male/Asian Female Relationships.
Add Opinion

Most Helpful Guy

  • krash2002
    I'm married to an incredibly beautiful Filipino woman, and have done so for the last 2 years. We haven't faced your social turmoil, but I applaud you for standing up and pushing forward. Being in an interracial relationship can be difficult, but is very much worth it. As you know you've found someone for the concept of true love and not purely necessary association.

    Being a white guy from the mid-west. Seeing an Asian girl was very uncommon in my city where I was born. It wasn't until I grew up and started traveling around the world, and eventually moved away. Did I understand as to exactly what I was looking for in a spouse. When I had finally came to the conclusion as to what I wanted in a long term companion. My now wife suddenly appeared before my eyes.

    koodos for you my friend. As my wife was born in America, but definitely carries forth her heritage with her. To which I've not only respected, but made sure is apart of our household. Just because we're in not Asia, and due to me being white. Doesn't mean our kids will be forced to only grow up with one cultural understanding.

    Yellow Fever may have been a "thing" in the 70s-early 2000's, but I believe it is now something to which has diminished to a degree. Interracial couples are everywhere, and Asian women flourish the streets in the US now. One of the largest growing ethnicity's in the US is South Pacific Asian's.

    Our generation has come to a partial worldly understanding, and mingling is finally coming acceptable to the point where bigot's are the few, and those who are willing to fight on are the many. With that being said, if you look around and see how many interracial relationships there really are. You'd be surprised as it's becoming more common every day. About half of my white guy friends are dating women of another race, and their families (such as my wifes) are fully accepting of it.

    Good luck, and I wish you and your soon to be wife the best.
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Girl

  • kaylaS91
    Great take!
    Nice to hear someone with a mindset similar to my own in respect to white/Asian relationships. Though my own is in reverse, with myself being the white girl and my boyfriend being an Asian who immigrated here 10 or so years ago, I can relate to a lot of your points. Though we have yet to deal with any open disapproval of us dating while out in public like the DQ incident, the side jabs are annoying nonetheless.

    I'm sure that when you move to Portland, it'll get a bit easier for you. :)
    Is this still revelant?
    • im surprised that you even get side jabbed lol

    • kaylaS91

      @BertMacklinFBI yeah.. I took it much harder when we first got together and it was a bit of a novelty for me. By now though, I just shrug it off. Haters gonna hate, whether we're interracial or not. :P
      how come you find that surprising, though?

    • thats a good way to look about it, cause i mean other people's opinions don't dictate your happiness, only you do.

      i was surprised because it doesn't even seem like a big deal, white female Asian male, even the reverse, it's like no big deal.

    • Show All

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions


What Girls & Guys Said

  • Spiorad_Aisce
    I am surprised at any grief you got for falling in love - Maybe because I come from a country that is high 90 percent white, I don't see many interracial relationships in real life but in all honesty I don't think it would phase me - To me all you did was fall in love with someone and the feeling was mutual, what could be more right than that,- - Be happy and have a great future with your wife
  • Phoenix98
    Well that's a lovely story congratulations on your soon to be marriage and unfortunately racists still exist all around the world. But glad that you didn't let it faze you. And I don't blame you for being fascinated by Japan either they have an amazing culture and history I love studying it to.
  • godfatherfan
    I don't get the "yellow fever" thing. I hear it is big yet I don't know anyone that has it. I am not turned on by Asian women and would not date one. But if that is your thing, sweet, more power to you.
  • Swim_Isaac
    My dad is of Spanish and Irish decent, while my mom is from Vietnam. All I can say is I think its worked out for me xD I like to think I have cool ancestory :P
  • gaaxure
    "we usually get compared to these two." So, she came out of nowhere, ruined everything good in your life, made you lose your friends and got you into weird stuff huh?
  • realerthanreal
    Even I would say, white women look far more better than Asian women. It is clear white men pursue Asian women out of spite lol.
  • Goldie757
    Great take.

    Unfortunately the men out there who regard Asian women is such an demeaning and disrespectful way has sullied the idea of such relationships.

    Congratulations, you are both lucky to have each other.
  • Ninja97
    Love reading Mytakes from people who are so passionate about things.
    The world needs more people with the same type of mindset. :) :)
    All the best to you and your future wife xx
    :) :)
  • Jxpxtxr
    Really I hate the term "yellow fever" lol like what about the vast population of Asians that are obsessed with white people then? Why isn't that called "white fever"?
    That aside I honestly never got the big deal some people have to make about others dating outside of their race.. For some odd reason there always have to be stereotypes attached to those people. Why can't humans get over the fact that some people are dating each other, regardless of their race, simply because they find each other hot? Gosh.. its really not that hard, is it?
    • pogicraft

      its not a big deal in real life (unless you know the person, I knew some people that had bad yellow fever and it was bad and weird because they basically resented growing up white) its a big deal and a fetish only because Asian and ebony are two of the most popular categories on porn sites even though these people would never actually date someone of that race/culture. And it stems from the exotic conquest mentality of like the 1600s where you went to far off places and tasted fruit unlike any you could find at home.

      Vast population of Asians that are obsessed with white people are usually women who stereotype white people as rich and superior. Also not a good thing.

    • Jxpxtxr

      @pogicraft even if that is the actual meaning people are misusing the term 90% of the time. I've had a Korean girlfriend and people were throwing that term at me all the time besides the usual "eww you're a lesbian?".
      And no lol, it's not just Asian women that have a white fetish I've made that experience first hand when I was in China, Japan and Korea where some creepy guys literally wouldn't leave me alone and that was definitely not because I'm so rich and powerful..

  • BertMacklinFBI
    yeah it seems closer towards the west coast you won't receive a lot of hate
  • FallOutBoy2001
    I'm an an AMWF relationship and so far it's been pretty free of harassment (at least serious harassment)
  • lovelywiz
    i have yellow fever for tall handsome Asian men.
    they are so sexy
  • steveguitar
    I have never had 'yellow fever' or any fetish for Asian women. Actually I can't recall ever being attracted to one. Just never had an asain girl catch my eye. I amore into European looking women, always have liked the look of Italian, Irish, or really any other European facial features. Besides the variety you can't get with European, blondes, brunettes, black hair, red head. There is nothing like that in asain girls, everything is tiny and jet black hair. And by tiny I don't mean small breasts or anything like that, though usually go together with being very skinny.
  • John_Doesnt
    How could we not like Asian women? They're all hot, youthful looking and have amazing hair.
  • CBryan
    It's not necessarily just looks, they are gerally nicer and better wives.
  • AlwaysBelieving
    Nice story and take. All the best mate. Your story reminded me of the video I saw awhile ago (below).

    I have a preference towards white gals. Could be because of where I was raised. It is what it is. My brother is engaged to an Asian gal, it's funny only in the way that my brother and I couldn't be any more different coming from the same parents.
  • Foreverafter23
    Awesome article, it made me happy and hopeful to find a awesome girl to marry. Love tracendence all
  • YourFutureEx
    Awesome :) best of luck for the future.
  • iFarted
    Is it still yellow fever if I date Asian girls?
    • IceEverest

      No... because you are Asian yourself.
      Though I won't, What about me? India is in Asia too?

  • Anonymous
    WM/AF is more accepted because they stay together and raise their kids. BM/WF ends with a poor single mom most of the time. The government statistics are out there and aren't changing.
  • Anonymous
    Wow I didn't know rice fvcker was a term. I thought everyone was accepting of it since it's so common.
    Like one of my friends said his family disowned him when he marked a Latina woman. Was I shocked, ya a little because I thought white people were OK with anything but black

    But nowadays the Asian and white couple is praised. I live in California and overheard these 2 guys in case talking about girls and one said with a smirk "I got me an Asian girl" and his friend gave him the thumbs up... I thought guys went outside of their race for the exotic look appeal not for stereotypes
  • Anonymous
    White men pursue Asian women because despite them being on gold digger side they tend to come more:

    1. Family oriented
    2. Know how to actual care about their man
    3. Don't slut around as much
    4. Submissive
    5. Aren't brainwashed feminist/misandrist
    6. Respectful

    Thanks to feminism nearly all of these traits are lost on western women and have been replaced with princess complex, narcissism, selfishness, non-GF material/slutty women, disrespectful and who are almost openly into misandrist who see men as things to use.
  • Anonymous
    Brilliant take! I can speak from my experience of dating an Asian (well, half) girl once... Best wishes for you and your partner's marriage. Never let anyone who disapproves get to you.