Why Casual Sex Is Wrong On So Many Levels

Anonymous
Why Casual Sex Is Wrong On So Many Levels

Introduction

Casual sex is any kind of sexual behavior devoid of commitment or attachment. You may call it booty calls, one-night-stands, hookups, friends with benefits, flings, whatever, but the essence is still the same: sex without commitment or attachment. The nature of casual sex is very similar to that of prostitution, but the latter, which comes with its own various names, involves monetary transactions while the former usually has no such implications and focuses on the specific type of sexual relationship (how frequent sex is in the relationship, with or without emotional attachment, how frequent the meetings are, with or without payment or other favors). For a detailed explanation of casual sex, you may want to check out the Casual Sex Project. The narratives are user-submitted, so truthfulness of the responses is difficult to validate. But with some imagination, you can read the narratives like verbal pornography, if there is any use for the stories, or you can pity the users who lead such lives.

Disease is very likely

A short-term casual sex encounter often means you don't know who you are sleeping with or what their sexual histories are. They may have whatever germ, but be perfectly asymptomatic at that point in time. They may be lying to you to have sex with you, or they may simply be unaware of their carrying STDs, or worse, they may be married and just want to have sex with someone other than their spouses for whatever reason. The more casual sexual partners you have, the more likely you will catch a STD.

Why Casual Sex Is Wrong On So Many Levels

Resistance to antibiotics in Neisseria gonorrheae is on the rise.

When you do get an STD, you may get treated, but don't get your hopes up too much. Antibiotic resistance in N. gonorrheae is on the rise, so it may be untreatable with available medicines. New medicines may be invented, but that is a matter of time, and time is crucial if you are infected with an untreatable disease. The best way to avoid gonorrhea is to avoid partnered sexual contact altogether, especially with an infected person or anything that raises the risks of STD contraction.

Dealing with long-term or lifelong STDs

You do not want to deal with STDs long-term, as they can have negative impacts on your whole health. Although some bugs can be cured, others cannot but can be treated. HPV. HIV. HSV. Untreated HPV can lead to cervical cancer and genital warts. Herpes give you mouth sores and genital lesions. HIV depletes your CD4+ T-cell count and causes AIDS, making you susceptible to opportunistic infections by pathogens that would otherwise be asymptomatic or controlled in immunocompetent people. HIV+ people who start antiretroviral therapy early are better off than those who start late or not at all. However, the virus is present in the body and constantly activates the immune system to get all fired up, even though it may be suppressed by drug therapy. The constant inflammatory response of HIV will eventually wear out the body, leading to several diseases related to chronic inflammation. In short, STDs are a pain in the neck and in the rear end, and they are a hefty price to pay for a brief fling one night when you were horny and probably didn't know any better.

Why Casual Sex Is Wrong On So Many Levels

Social stigma with being diagnosed with STDs

There is a social stigma with being diagnosed with STDs, especially the incurable ones. Although it is easy for a person who has lived a sexually conservative life to think that people deserve the STDs they get for sleeping around too much or breaking sexual taboos, this lack of sympathy is doing no one good. It is doing no good for the affected person, and the affected will avoid seeking medical care to avoid being noticed with an STD. It is also doing no good for the criticizer, because the criticizer is setting up the STD patient for future injury. The best way to counteract the social stigma is to forgive the affected person of real or perceived sins and hope that the person would learn from past mistakes and turn away from the lifestyle. Though, you probably don't want to be upfront about the lifestyle that predisposes the person to STDs, because the person may get defensive and thus not be cooperative with you. If you can find a way to subconsciously manipulate or change the person's lifestyle, behavior, and attitudes that condone casual sex, then go for it.

Casual sex is based on physical impulses of the self rather than on compassion or concern for the holistic wellness of the other individual.

Whether the casual sex is an one-night-stand or friends-with-benefits, it is usually concerned with the satisfaction of the individual, as opposed to the holistic mutual satisfaction of both partners. Casual sex partners may care whether their partners feel satisfied about the sex, because that satisfaction is an indicator of sexual performance and future successful casual sex encounters. However, if any change of plan interferes with the partners' sex life together, they usually terminate the relationship instead of seeking other, non-sexual, ways to fulfill each other's happiness.

Casual sex is a threat to marriage and long-term commitment and support.

Too many people have casual sex while being married. This kind of behavior is a threat to marriage, because it needlessly puts the married couple at risk of carrying a STD, and it destroys the mutual trust that married partners are obligated to give one another. Some people probably think it's a thrill to engage in an adulterous affair, a new partner who is more exciting than the married partner, but do not want to get caught. To hide the sin, they avoid buying condoms and barriers, which predisposes them to engage in unprotected sex. They catch a STD and transmit the STD to their married partner, so the faithful partner is fucked up. So, the lesson is that covering up a sin just leads to more sin. Acknowledging your wrong, which includes the intention (not just the behavior) to engage in adultery, is the mature way to handle things.

Why Casual Sex Is Wrong On So Many Levels

Prostitution as a subset of casual sex, and casual sex as a subset of fornication

I see prostitution as a subset of casual sex, and casual sex as a subset of fornication. Like casual sex, prostitution is primarily a sexual relationship, but unlike casual sex, it involves some kind of material transaction or favors. Prostitution can take place in many forms - brothel/institution, individual sex worker, sugar relationships/mistress/concubine, etc. Casual sex may or may not involve money, and if it does, it has turned into prostitution. An example of casual sex without money would be a friends-with-benefits relationship. Two persons are good friends and participate in sexual activities together, but they consciously choose not to advance the relationship beyond friends. This may imply that they do not seek to marry each other and start families, or they may just use each other for sexual comforts.

Casual sex is a form of fornication, which encompasses all unmarried intimate relationships that involve sexual intercourse, but not all unmarried relationships are casual sex. Some relationships are officially unmarried, because the committed partners cannot marry legally. Other relationships are in the dating stage, which for some people, means the having-sex-with-your-partner stage. Nowadays, we just call this kind of unmarried-but-committed-sexual-romantic-relationship-sex "relationship sex" to differentiate it from casual sex. If children results in the romantic relationship, then the couple may be considered socially as "married by common law".

Of course, there are some people who would never opt for a fornicatory relationship, because such a relationship counters one's moral conscience, and may thus imply very grave consequences, psychologically, socially, and spiritually.

Why Casual Sex Is Wrong On So Many Levels

If you are a straight woman, your marriagability and pool of potential spouses go downhill.

If you are a straight woman, then your marriagability and pool of potential spouses will go downhill. Here's why. Many single eligible bachelors prefer virgins. Sure, you may find a handful of men who claim that their future wife's virginity is unimportant, but these are men who can tolerate a non-virgin wife. You may find some men who claim that they prefer a more sexually experienced woman, but this group seems to be a rare find. In addition, if a man perceives the woman is too willing to give into sex, he may start using her just for sex instead of waiting for commitment or marriage. Another sad truth is that some men have this virgin/whore mentality: that they feel entitled to get sex from sluts while prefer to marry a virgin later in life. So, if you are straight virginal woman, then your best bet is to keep your virginity until you find a man who will marry you for the whole person you are, not because you're a virgin. A man who only has sex with you because you are a virgin is not a good man, because it is likely that he will dump you after he has sex with you, and you won't be able to give your virginity to your husband or someone who sincerely loves you.

Conclusion

I have written here a list of objections to casual sex. Hopefully, some people will find them helpful in some way. Feel free to share your thoughts about this take.

Why Casual Sex Is Wrong On So Many Levels
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Anonymous
    I absolutely agree that casual sex is not the way to go. I'm waiting until I get married to have sex but I also realize that not everyone holds those ideals. The problem is that everyone who has casual sex is not truly happy. I realize that not everyone wants a committed relationships but at the end of the day I don't see what they are getting out of casual sex. After revealing themselves on such an intimate level to someone who may or may not respect them. I don't know about other people, but I would personally be really hurt if I had sex with someone and they stopped returning my phone calls, stopped texting me & stopped contact altogether. No one would be okay with that. Also, I feel like people downplay the importance of losing your virginity. Like everyone seems to encourage girls to explore their sexuality even when they're only 15 years old. That sounds absolutely ridiculous. When I was fifteen I was still figuring out who I was. The last thing I wanted to think about was how to appear sexy. If she doesn't she is called a prude and is not seen as attractive anymore. Why is that? I actually had a guy break up with me because I didn't agree to have sex with him and even though it hurt, I was glad that I stuck to my beliefs. It would have been worse if I had agreed and he still ended up breaking up with me. I would never engage in casual sex and I though I may be wrong I get the impression that most girls eventually regret doing that somewhere down the line (whether it's weeks, months, or years later). I liked reading your take on this :)
    Is this still revelant?
    • Anonymous

      Anyone who breaks up with you and justifies his/her action of breaking up with you by your refusal to sleep with him/her would not make a good long-term partner. You are right for breaking up with him. You should deserve someone better. Someone who loves you for you, and not someone to have sex with.

    • Anonymous

      Aww, thank you! :) & I just realized how much I wrote above lol :) Thanks for reading all that!

    • DrGtheMD

      I certainly do not advocate sexual activity when one is 15 years old but I do wish to point out that I am 67 years old and I am still trying to figure out who I am. And there is no "lol" after that sentence.

    • Show All

Most Helpful Guy

  • Mesonfielde
    "" "or worse, they may be married and just want to have sex with someone other than their spouses for whatever reason. "" "

    How is having sex with a married person worse than getting inflicted with an untreatable disease?
    You have very strange values and it's really difficult to take this seriously from that point.

    """Casual sex is a threat to marriage and long-term commitment and support"""

    Actually, the real threat is the partner who doesn't bother to have sex with you in a committed and supposedly theoretically love-based relationship, so much that going against all that and having sex with some random person instead seems like a more rewarding and EMOTIONALLY MORE FULFILLING idea.

    And people wonder why their spouse cheats on them! Oh I do wonder. Maybe because a healthy relationship is reciprocal give and take. If you cannot provide the most basic requirements such as compassion, admiration, passion and sexual intimacy... Obviously you might find your partner in someone else's bed, and it will be your fault.
    Is this still revelant?
    • you are talking about love and still justify promiscuity.

    • @policeofficer technically I am speaking more about cheating than about sex-only relations and one night stands.

    • why would a guy cheat on her for refusing sex?

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

1739
  • Blonde401
    Okay so you don't like casual sex - don't have it then?
    • I don't have and I have the right to express my opinion.

    • Blonde401

      @policeofficer you can but you should have titled it 'why casual sex is wrong for me on so many levels'. Casual sex isn't an issue for you because you're not having any, so why do you care what anyone else does with their body?

    • but this article is not mine. lol Anyways people should understand that when someone says smth is wrong or right they mean it is their opinion. I am saying being a slut is a bad thing. is it hard to understand that I mean it is wrong IN MY OPINION?

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  • Metlahaed
    I must disagree with this My Take completely, casual sex is great, marriage is dumb, and the current status quo onset by idiotic religious principles needs to change anyway.
    • it means you and your friends more likely to have sex with the same woman, and when she is pregnant, nobody knows whose father is.
      You, please don't get married. Poor your future wife.

    • Anonymous

      @beinghonest To be fair, we now have paternity tests, which really change the nature of paternity. Now, paternity is not based on recognition of the child by the father. It is based on genetic tests.

    • Metlahaed

      @beinghonest I most certainly will not get married. I said marriage is dumb, why would I participate in a stupid tradition I think is dumb? Plus, my "wife" would be able to sleep with other men too, so why is it my "poor wife?"

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  • normalice
    so, basically, your take can be broken down into two reasons:
    1) The risks of STDs
    2) Piety.

    (1) is valid, and there are ways to circumvent that risk. (2) is not valid. You're going to have to accept the fact that some people are more interested in getting off than they are in getting your approval.
  • pnl86
    "If you are straight virginal woman, then your best bet is to keep your virginity until you find a man who will marry you for the whole person you are, not because you're a virgin. A man who only has sex with you because you are a virgin is not a good man, because it is likely that he will dump you after he has sex with you, and you won't be able to give your virginity to your husband or someone who sincerely loves you."

    I'm so confused on what's actually important. Is "being a virgin" and "not having sex" what's important, or is "finding a good man who loves you for who you are" important? If it's the former, then who cares if the man doesn't really love you for who you are (but only because of sex... even if that means he only loves you because you're a "virgin")? If it's the latter, then who cares about whether or not you're a virgin? O. o

    After all, won't a man who loves you as a whole love "you," and not get hung up on how many sexual partners you've had, or whether he's going to be your "first," etc?

    Contradiction and hypocrisy are the hallmarks of "conservatives" and "traditional" advocates in the 21st century.

    An amusing read, but ultimately futile. Go ahead and try to attract a quality husband by basically "not having sex." See how well that works out for you, and then spend the rest of your life trying to continually convince others around you (and yourself) how the person you ended up with is a wonderful man, how your children have inherited such wonderful genes, how your children's chances of succeeding in society have been maximized, and how you've lived so happily for the remainder of your married life.

    Unfortunately, individuals are powerless in the face of macro market forces.

    "If you can't stop the wind, then you can't stop the storm." (Japanese proverb - Kaze Arashi Ryu).

    By all means, however, please continue. Eventually, a mating strategy that basically targets and actively selects sexually inferior males will go extinct. So, there's no real reason to have any sort of hostility or ill feelings towards your opinions. Eventually, we won't be hearing much of them anymore.
    • I am a virgin and if my future boyfriend doesn't value it then I will dump him. Being a virgin is one of the things that makes me the way I am.

  • AleDeEurope
    But... but... boobs... butts... pussy... more boobs, butts and pussy... boobs, butts, pussy... Ehhh sorry, give me a pack of condoms, too much fun to not take advantage of it.

    P. S.: The last point is bs xD
  • Psi_Unknown
    Lol. I don't know whether to laugh or cry at these reasons...

    Coming into contact with humans is enough to cause disease, therefore one should avoid contact with humans. If you can follow of course... Why only worry about diseases that can be transmitted sexually anyway?

    I could be really ignorant about this, please do correct me if I am wrong, but I thought the difference between HIV and AIDS had to do with one's resistance to the disease. Those with partial resistance developed HIV, while those with no resistance quickly developed AIDS. (Those with full resistance would not replicate the virus in their systems.)

    Let us not forget that one should never do anything that has or would cause social stigma! That previous comment was sarcasm for those who do not know.

    Also, people who are married and/or in long-term committed relationships always know each other and cannot transmit diseases to each other. (The previous comment was also sarcasm.)

    Viruses can be a pain in the neck to treat, but algorithms can shut down the systems involved to stop the replicative process.

    Why even bother having sexual contact if it ruins your brain, inhibits you from thinking logically, and opens up pathways that make it difficult to have resistance to so many things that can be harmful?

    I do agree that it might ruin long-term commitment and relationships, but so too, can many other things.
  • ManOnFire
    A lot of this is very true, yeah. But a lot of men do prefer women with some experience, that part's not so true. And it's not rare for a guy to want an experienced woman. I would wanting a virgin or an experienced woman are about 50-50 for guys.
    • Define experienced and want? Want as in for a sexual partner? Then yes, but as a long term partner? I don't think many guys do. As for experience, is that two or three or fifty? Each person has their own definition for that.

    • ManOnFire

      @hellionthesage I'm pretty sure most men who've slept with an experienced woman don't mind marrying her long-term, no. If she has a slutty history, then that's another story, but if her sexual experience has come from prior RELATIONSHIPS, I don't think that bothers most men.

    • Well thats why I said define experienced. It could mean vastly different things.

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  • lumos
    "You may find some men who claim that they prefer a more sexually experienced woman, but this group seems to be a rare find"
    Pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff.
  • justbanANNAz
    finally...
    so nice to see like minded women around here.
  • sparkly-crystal
    I'm a Mormon and I strongly agree with most of your points. But the rest of America don't share the same values, having casual sex won't align with my values and the moral barometer I set for myself. Some people like living a life of pure hedonism which is also okay.
  • ScorpioMoonChick
    STDs are the main argument that stands. However, the moment that "fornication" was said, my mind was like, "yep, you're religious."

    Now, being religious is not a bad thing; but it is important to remember that not everyone believes i n the same religion, and therefore, does not share the same values.

    I think that you could of said less about fornication, and more about the impact on spiritual and emotional well-being. That way, less people would write you off as a "Southern Baptist."

    And about virginity... I'm not going to say that it's not important, because your first time does shape how you view about sex, and people tend to get very emotionally attached, so that's not something that you should do during a ONS. But in my opinion, we should not treat girls like "damaged goods" if they are non virgins. Just help them understand that your virginity is not connected to your self worth.
  • alphadoggystyle
    while im undecided wheter if casual sex should be encouraged or not, it doesn't really matter to me, im enjoying it being encouraged while i can while still seeing the negative aspects of it.

    However, marriage is far more comparable to prostitution than casual sex is.
  • TheSpartan
    It's not "wrong" per se, just a dangerous activity that should be done only with heavy caution. It's not as simple and risk-free as many make it out to be.
    • Exactly. I would of said more about the fear of commitment, pair bonding and causal sex's effect on that as well as how instant gratification could affect relationships and instead of the "stay pure," I'd say "stay mindful."

  • FrenchyRomain
    you talk about all these STDs linked to casual sex... yet you know condoms exist right? you say casual sex is wrong... fine, then haw about you don't have casual sex? your opinion is your opinion no one can critisize you... but you can't expect everyone to be on the same side as you... for starters : I'm definitely not
    • AdamThomas

      Condoms protect from pregnancy, you can still catch some STDs through condoms.

    • jacquesvol

      @AdamThomas you can even get some STDs by drinking from a poorly washed cup.

    • TriniMed

      Most STD are curable. Scientist are actual close to working cure for HIV too.

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  • damnwinter
    The mere fact that you chose to be anonymous shows that society is not ready to hear all this. They're too busy being demonstratively 'free', as in proudly irresponsible. As in, utterly immature and shallow. But it's good that there are still people like you, trying to get this out in the open. :)
    • but why should we be afraid of showing our disapproval of promiscuity?

    • damnwinter

      @policeofficer because then, most people will see us as judgmental assholes who are either insecure (right, cause in order to want to live in a decent world you MUST be ugly, lol) or tyrannical brainwashed jerks. Because who are we to be bothered by anything, right? :))

    • oooo MOST PEOPLE will see us judgmental assholes? lol it seems you are the who is butthurt by this. The word "asshole " proves you are butthurt that I show my disapproval of promiscuity. And MOST people? lol why would MOST people care who I like and dislike?

    • Show All
  • meatballs21
    In other words:
    People who have casual sex will be swimming with STDs, adulterers, emotionally stunted, support prostitutes, and unsuitable for long term relationships.

    And then below, you say even people who got married (as JESUS intended!) are sleeping around anyway, so in the same vein of exaggeration, we should all become monks/nuns.
  • Sara413
    STD's are no laughing matter, that's for sure, but as long as people are responsible, they can largely be avoided. I've had my fair share of casual sex and I've never caught anything. I always used condoms with every partner up until the relationship I am in now, and have always gotten tested between every partner. Of course, nothing but abstinence is fool proof, but still it's very easy to significantly decrease the risks while still enjoying "fornication".

    As for idea about purity - don't give a shit.
    • "As for idea about purity - don't give a shit."
      Haha, I 100% agree with you, people should be able to do what they like without other people's "morals" being used to judge them.

    • @wegetalittletipsy I value my purity.

    • Sara413

      @policeofficer good for you?

      It's an empty concept to most people.

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  • AdamThomas
    A lot of people will never get it. I slept around a lot when I was younger which I'm not proud of, luckily I never caught anything.
    • Anonymous

      Many STDs are asymptomatic. This does not mean they do not do damage, though. Chlamydia can cause sterility.

    • AdamThomas

      Yeah I got tested and have gotten my girlfriend pregnant 3 times since (all planned) so I'm definitely not sterile lol.

    • DrGtheMD

      So you're the father of three andd you're not married. What a stud you are!

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  • Abe90
    Well, meaningless sex can have it's moments but for someone like myself, I'd rather find someone who has either not slept with someone or slept with only one or two people. I'm still a virgin at 26 and I wanted to lose it a long time ago but it's never happened for me. So at this point, I kind of don't care anymore
  • SchmouSee
    I agree, however there is one question to you: personally, I have very little experience and the longer I go without it (7 months) the more anxious I get about performance. I am scared that if I do decide to sleep with my boyfriend, he will leave me because I am no good at it. Practise does make perfect, so what happens to the girls who don't have sex? Their self-esteem goes down
    • Anonymous

      Being good in bed is not important, but this "skill" is highly variable. It is possible to standardize "being good in bed", because everything in sexuality is subjective/personal. So, just having good listening and communication skills will suffice the lack of real sexual experience.

      Besides, if your significant other really loves you, then "being good in bed" should not matter in whether he will hold onto the relationship. Also, you should not rest your self-esteem on sexual performance. There are many compatible, compassionate sexless relationships.

    • Anonymous

      Erase the first sentence and second sentence.

      Being good in bed is not important, BECAUSE this "skill" is highly variable. It is IMPOSSIBLE to standardize "being good in bed", because everything in sexuality is subjective/personal.

  • Oxi112094
    I think you should just be careful when sleeping with someone new. Wrap it up, use birth control pills, do other forms of contraceptives. I dont think casual sex is wrong. I've never had casual sex since i've only been with one person before and thats my choice. I dont judge people for having many sexual partners.. its not my business. Also just becuase someone has an STD or is HIV positive, doesn't mean they are any less human.
    • Anonymous

      Yep. I wrote a whole paragraph on STD Stigma.

  • kat_gran
    This was just too long to read... so I scanned it but by the time i reached halfway I was glad I didn't read it :)
    STDs, sure! good case against it... use protection... Righteousness? Sorry... but if you are having sex with decent, good persons and it's casual, but someone you trust and not every man on the street... There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with having casual sex.. We are all human beings and it is a very healthy thing to have an active and sexual lifestyle. People just need to be CAUTIOUS AND CAREFUL with WHOM they are having a sexual lifestyle with and BE PROTECTED AT ALL TIMES (also physically and emotionally)... But otherwise, I don't see anything wrong with that, once you are being MATURE, OPEN, and HONEST about it at all times. We are adults, we can act as such.
    • Metlahaed

      Truth.

      Plus, encouraging safe sex is better than telling us casual sex is "wrong" are you kidding me?

      From what I have seen good girls who are religious get more STDs because they think having one or two partners is safe to use no protection while the sluttiest girls will kick a guy out for even suggesting to forgo the condom. Power to the people, be smart dominant cone confident. Slutty girls who know whats up are the best kind of people. They save lives.

    • kat_gran

      @Metlahaed hahaha... Truee. The problem is that religious people are not educated about the world. They are maintained naive and then get the bad end of the deal. It's a pity but it's the truth. KNOWLEDGE IS POWER, and using that power for good is better than being religious.

    • what education do you mean? protection?

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  • hazoplmeught
    damn... i made you feel this bad after fucking you the other day. Damn... didn't need to type this whole essay cause of that. lol
  • Minxxie
    I personally don't like casual sex either BUT you still can't convince me to be a bitch and judge people who do, sorry! It's their life and their choices are none of my business, the only people I judge are those who knowingly pass on stds. If it's safe sex and it's consensual sex that's all I care about the rest is none of my business... it's none of yours either for that matter. You can go on thinking it's immoral to have consensual and safe casual sex but I find it far more immoral to be a judgmental bully about someonething that is none of your business.
  • Kylesar
    So it goes back to Marriage and STDs, the latter of which isn't magically prevented by marriage and can spread outside of sex, and the former itself being a financial death sentence for men
  • GreatnessRevamped
    I think prostitutes do a somewhat of a service. Those hoes always have condoms.
    People are horny and want to get their rocks off and I think it's better than tricking some poor soul into sex with promises of a relationship.
  • WhiteSteve
  • abundantlyrich
    Nothing new eh...
    But when people are heavily influenced by their peers and media, they are still going to do it if a stranger like you say NO it's not a good idea.
  • Panay
    I've never met anyone bothered by the virginity of a partner, and I don't mean they're willing to put up with it-I mean they genuinely don't care. And a lot of guys would prefer a woman with experience.
  • BelleGirl21
    I agree with a lot here but you didn't really touch on the negative emotional effects of casual sex which for me would be the biggest problem.
  • lolitalulz
    so cos you're conservative, you believe we should all be.. lol.
  • Relentless_Hippie
    Why are people offended? Nice take.
    • Sabretooth

      they're kids. what do you expect?

    • They're offended because they feel guilty about their own immoral actions. This was a great take, and she's right about the things she said.

    • Sabretooth

      @RichardHarrow48329 yup

  • 7André7
    given we have condoms this unneccesairy long post sounds even dumber
    • Lol...

    • Condoms aren't good against warts, syphillis and gonorrhoea

    • DrGtheMD

      @theegreat017 your post is perfect for it amplifies the problem with this website and indeed other websites that discuss sex, relationships and sexually transmitted diseases. What you said is just the opposite, the complete opposite of known fact. Condoms are most effective against syphilis, gonorrhea and venereal warts. People state complete an incorrect and incorrect supposed to truths and others pass it along and the only monitoring is done by 19 and 25-year-old with nothing better to do. We are speaking of STDs as if they popped up yesterday and casual sex is a newfound concept. Christopher Columbus died of the complications of syphilis so to George Washington, Al Capone and I believe Florence Nightingale. Intimacy, emotional commitment and the struggle involved between man and woman has been around since the beginning of time. The maturation process of understanding that type of commitment has also been present since forever.

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  • BusinessBasketball
    Girls that are like this are turn offs. I do not like old fashioned closed minded girls.
  • gapminder
    It devalues one of the most intimate human experiences there is. And turns it into a selfish self serving act.
  • ThatBritishLad
    We talkin' casual sex as in lovers, or casual sex as in two random people deciding to bonk? Because I've always felt the latter was a bit weird.
  • rjroy3
    So... to sum things up. A risk of STD's, it's based on impulse and is a threat to marriage. Lol.
  • ClariceOwen23
    Well then don't have it.
  • ZenithDawn
    i dont do that shit, though there was this one boy i did jack off with in 9th grade
  • so i get that you´re not a fan of casual sex. no problem with that. but please read this https://markmanson.net/std-guide and correct your opinion about the likelyhood of catching an std. you don´t need to read all of it, just the headers and facts.

    the likelyhood of catching a very bad one is lover than in sex with 1000 partners without protection. those you get easily are not an issue as they are easily curable. plus the bad ones are all preventable, simply using a freaking condom.

    i´m not saying you shouldn´t care for stds or something but your take is exaggerating it to the other extreme and making it sound overly bad which is just objectively isn´t.

    same with all your other arguments. you skew them pretty hard in order to make your point. i´m not saying, you´re wrong. i´m just saying, you´re exaggerating.

    • Anonymous

      Universal standard precautions should be foremost. Always assume every specimen you touch or are exposed to contains a deadly infectious agent.

    • so honestly if you were together with man on an evening where you were particularly horny and he was particularly hot and you mentally and emptionally had an overwhelmingly good connection, would you wait till marriage and make a std test for every possible std first? we are not talking about an an animal with rabies here, we´re taling about somebody "possibly" having an std, that you will not get, if use protection.

    • Anonymous

      In an ideal world, people should get tested after every sexual encounter. But, we don't live in an ideal world, and people just make bad choices. This does not mean we should not strive for good choices. But people still need to get tested after every sexual encounter. They may feel horny, but they should also accept that STDs are possible.

      Marriage does not protect against STDs. In this day and age, where too many people are sleeping around, you can't guarantee that your married partner has a clean record, unless he/she has been tested, and has not made any sexual contact since getting tested.

    • Show All
  • parisdale
    that not everybody is conservative like you are.. lolol.
  • Marinepilot
    Quit acting like a Sothern Baptist.
  • Scrambledagain
    Marraige is a pretty bad std👊🏻
  • Lukapum
    Nice take
  • Sabretooth
    all good points.
  • Anonymous
    There's absolutely nothing wrong with having casual sex at all whether it be a one night stand, flings or with a regular friends with benefits.

    If it weren't for casual sex, I'd still be clueless as to what I enjoy and what I can do without.

    I love it and have enjoyed it many times bareback 😉
    • Anonymous

      And I've never caught an STI either.

  • Anonymous
    This isn't strong reasoning but I agree with your thesis/premise.
  • Anonymous
    So what about the sexual desires? Putting up with hours of talking and 3 or 4 dates is too much when I just want a quick release.
  • Anonymous
    Disease is very likely - use protection because it prevents a lot of STDs
    Social stigma with being diagnosed with STDs - social stigma is not the fault of casual sex, it's the fault of the people
    discrminating against other people
    Casual sex is based on physical impulses - perhaps, but it's a mutually beneficial and fun thing that doesn't hurt anyone else
    Casual sex is a threat to marriage and long-term commitment and support - Does anyone give a fuck? If you or your partner
    sleep around when you're in a relationship then that's your problem, if other people having casual sex is a threat to your
    relationship then that just shows how pathetic your relationship is
    If you are a straight woman, your marriagability and pool of potential spouses go downhill - Am I listening to you correctly?
    Are you actually justifying double standards against women? People who hold these double standards are bigots.
    I can tell you if I don't care about a women's past, in fact I like a woman who goes after what she wants rather than
    behaving how other people want her too (I would worry about the risk of STDs, but so long as she used protection
    with me I'd be ok).
  • Anonymous
    So I take it you disapprove of me banging a hooker...
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