3 Real Problems Women Suffer Through That No One Talks About

3 Real Problems Women Suffer Through That No One Talks About

Nowdays radical feminists try to make every problem a sexist problem (you didn't like the way I made your coffee? oppression! you just think I can't make good coffee because I'm a woman!)

And while I agree western countries don't exactly need feminism anymore as it reached it's goal, woman are equal to men in terms of laws, there are still problems that no one talks about. Problems that actually matter, not just some feminazi playing the victim constantly, but things people choose to ignore.

- You can't walk alone at night or be alone at clubs

Any woman knows this fear. Even if you're walking in a street with few people, it's scary as hell. You try to make your way back to a safe place as quick as possible, with crippling anxiety and the feeling of vulnerability. Taking a walk shouldn't be so fucking stressful.

Also, there's a golden rule all women know well: if you're going to a bar or a club, always have friends with you. Because you never know who might slip something into your drink, you never know what could happen if you are alone in a place full of drunk men, you have to deal with drunk guys hitting on you and in severe cases groping and touching you inappropriately without your consent. You have to worry about all these details, you can't even enjoy a night out.

3 Real Problems Women Suffer Through That No One Talks About

- Constant fear of men

Again, not something a feminazi would scream out like "MEN SUCK!". As a woman, it's hard to trust any man, even if you think he's your friend, you don't know how he'll turn once he's angry, drunk, etc. As a kid (and even to this day) my mom won't let me go alone with a man she doesn't know well, even if he seems genuinely nice and unharmful.

Physically speaking, not stereotypically, men are stronger than women. It's a biological fact, not a sexist opinion. At the end of the way, if we end in a position where a guy is taking advantage on us, there's nothing much we can do to stop him.

To the guys reading this: if you feel like a woman you don't really know is scared of you or doesn't feel comfortable by your presence, know it's not personal. We are taught to be wary of men ever since we are kids. And it's not done in order for us to hate men, but to be careful. Because there are many girls there who put their trust into men who want nothing but harm, and our parents simply look after us.

3 Real Problems Women Suffer Through That No One Talks About

- Slut shaming

Unfortunately, it's still in our society. And honestly, it's more women who do it rather than men, which I find utterly strange. I would also like to remind you that not all girls are feminists, feminism isn't about educating specifically men, it's also about educating girls (and believe me, I know more than a few girls who proudly said they support chauvinism).

There are still people out there (like I said, mainly girls) who go after women who wear "small" clothing and harass them, calling them sluts, threatening them, saying it was her fault she got raped because she was wearing something revealing, etc.

When a guy posts a swimsuit photo to social media, he gets praised and called hot, but when a girl posts a picture of herself in a bikini, she gets called a slut, both done by women. These women aren't helping and are a major part of the problem. But there are also men who contribute to this;

Women getting fired from their jobs because they wore "inappropriate clothing" (inappropriate clothing meaning a shirt that's a little to tight for a man to contain his dick in his pants), girls kicked from schools for showing a freaking bra strap or having their collarbones exposed. How does no one find this wrong?

For example, check this out. Apparently her dress was crossing the line, being too distracting, viewers couldn't keep their dicks calm and focus on the weather report, so they decided to make it the broadcaster's problem. How does that make any sense? How is that a logical reason to stop a news broadcasting?

3 Real Problems Women Suffer Through That No One Talks About
3 Real Problems Women Suffer Through That No One Talks About

Before I end this, I want to clarify something (especially to men) - there's a very large difference between a feminist, and a feminazi. When you guys say you hate feminists in the comments, I'm pretty sure you mean feminazis, and that can really be misleading. I would really like it if you all stopped saying you hate feminists, and use the word feminazi instead, because like I said, there's a very big difference.

Feminist - a person (not necessarily a girl) who fights for equal rights.

Feminazi - nearly always a girl who shames men, thinks women are superior, makes herself the victim in every situation, thinks everything negative someone tells her is about the fact she's a woman (aka turning every regular problem to a 'sexist' problem), thinks all men are bad, creates drama out of everything.

3 Real Problems Women Suffer Through That No One Talks About

3 Real Problems Women Suffer Through That No One Talks About
3 Real Problems Women Suffer Through That No One Talks About
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33Girl Opinion
57Guy Opinion

Most Helpful Guy

  • the_rake
    Ok, I have a few problems with this take.

    Number one, more men are victims of violent crime, although I guess that could just be because women lock themselves up indoors and don't go anywhere without friends more often. But still, we don't have any credible figures to verify such a theory.

    2. Let's distinguish between shaming someone for what they wear and shaming someone for being promiscuous because those are two very different things but they get conflated. A promiscuous woman might not even wear anything especially revealing but she could be very sexually active and secretly so, regardless. Contrarily, society might "assume" that women in short skirts and bikinis are promiscuous but be way off the mark altogether. My point is, there's nothing really stopping a woman from having a PRIVATE sex life - and that's what sex should be: nobody else's business but your own. Let's not pretend that chauvinism is keeping people from being promiscuous.

    As for the OTHER kind of slut-shaming... You said it! It's not men, it's women. Yes it sucks and I don't like slut-shaming (the only thing that pisses me off is hypergamy). But women are shamed for bikini selfies on Facebook? If girls are calling each other sluts, it's happening behind closed doors: gossip and private messaging because if a hot girl posts a half-naked selfie, it's just guys complimenting her (on the photo I mean). And THAT'S a problem: too many "white knights" pandering to these girls egos with their "likes" and compliments.

    3. Feminism - because this, unfortunately, turned out to be your underlying agenda. Before you throw the book at me and ask me to "read the definition", I'd like to point out the lack of political sophistication you can find in such a book. "equality" has become an obfuscated concept and in our day and age the debate between feminists and feminazis has much more blurred lines and overlaps than the picture you posted. That's because of third wave feminism and the fact that inequalities between myth and women are definitely NOT so profound anymore. If they are not so profound, why do we need a movement with its etymological roots in something that is so gynocentric (FEMInism)? Why can't we change the etymological focus to a movement that actually cares equally about BOTH sides of gender issues (EQUALitarianism)?

    Just some food for thought.
    Like 20 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • rjroy3

      This deserves MHO, but she probably won't give it up. So here's my honorary stamp of approval. 👍

    • the_rake

      @rjroy3 appreciated

    • Not to be that guy, but egalitarianism, not equalitarianism.
      On the whole feminist thing, how would you feel about soneone who said, "I support women's rights," versus someone who identified as a feminist.

    • Show All

Most Helpful Girl

  • Anonymous
    Much to people's disagreement,
    I completely agree.

    I used to go out a lot - I was a solo performer so it was often I walked to gigs alone. I also was dressed up, meaning a tight top and a small skirt and boobs. I didn't feel safe but the only plus I had was I knew how to defend myself.

    All that was shattered when I was drugged and raped by a "friend" after a gig.

    I'm now terrified to walk alone, I cover myself as much as possible, I even wear ugg boots in 30C weather. It's a secure thing.

    I used to wear small skirts and tight tops because I had lost a lot of weight and I was newly single. By a lot I mean 2 stone (14 pounds). I was proud of my figure.

    I became ashamed of my figure and I've now gained more weight than I want to admit but I hate showing my body because of my size.
    I hide within myself.
    Like 5 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • zagor

      Yet your bad experience had nothing to do with walking alone, but rather with a poor choice of acquaintances.

    • fanggirl5

      @zagor Ummmmm did you just blame her for her friend drugging and raping her? Sometimes people seem nice and they aren't. Surely this has happened to you! Woman are mainly sexually assaulted by someone they know rather than a stranger and implying they were in any at fault for someone else's behaviour, whether they were friends with them or not, is incredibly offensive and thoughless. This poor woman was drugged and raped and your comment was about her behaviour. Shame on you.

    • Anonymous

      Yes. Silly me for thinking that someone I knew (because he used to be married to a co worker) for a few years and had children almost my age (literally 5 years younger than me) was a rapist. Also someone well known in the community for helping at charity events and known by basically everyone.

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • HorrorFan
    1. This isn't a feminist argument. This is a complaint about shitty people. There are bad people in the world. They will choose victims mostly at night and when they are alone. This is just an unfortunate reality of society. There is no actual cure to this. It affects both genders.

    If you feel you can't enjoy a night out going to places that have drunk men, then why are you? You full well know what alcohol does to a person. They aren't in full control of their actions.

    2. This is paranoia to an almost insane level. What you aren't getting is that your own mother has been psychologically damaging you since childhood. Let's be fearful of every man on earth when how many girls are socially and psychologically traumatized by a group of little queen bee bitches in school? But you know, let's also ignore that. There's nothing wrong with being cautious, but assuming that all men are just disrespectful, violent shit heads is insane.

    3. Not only do women do a large portion of the slut shaming, but a study was done recently that showed women being the perpetrators of 50% of ALL MISOGYNY PERIOD, on twitter. Women are insanely competitive and territorial creatures. A part of why slut shaming happens is because one of the most effective methods of getting under a girl's skin is to call her some form of a slut or whore. Even when a girl is doing nothing sexual, they are often called sluts or whores when someone (mostly women) dislike them.

    I honestly find it strange that you find this strange. You act like women are just all in solidarity with each other. I mean, how many women do you know that fully admit that they don't really have many female friends and they mostly stick to guy friends because they "don't want to deal with drama." Because I know quite a few like this.

    Another factor in slut shaming that doesn't have to do with men specifically is the conservative/traditional/religious side of things. This is still completely rampant in the US and has very little tolerance for women that even think about using their vaginas outside of marriage.

    I don't hate feminists. I hate the warped ideology feminism has become. Feminazis might be worse, but you are all cut from the same cloth. Feminism in no way cares about men's issues like child custody or divorces and just perpetuates it's own agenda. That is not equality. If you truly wanted equality, separate yourself from the whole mess and just identify as egalitarian without bothering with a fucked up movement.
    Like 1 Person
    • Anonymous

      yes, I find it strange because women can relate more to these sexist problems, so why would they support them?

    • HorrorFan

      They aren't supporting sexist problems, they are mostly just being mean. Men tend to battle with their physicality (part of the reason you are so scared of us) and women tend to battle with their words. Obviously, both are quite capable of either still.

      Women are just as guilty as men are in every facet of verbal misogyny. When you can relate to a group of people, you also know what is most effective against them. Men call other men faggots and homos and the like, not to be homophobic, but because they know that questioning another man's sexuality and manliness is one of the most effective ways of getting under their skin. Calling a girl a slut or a variant of slut has proven time and time again to be incredibly effective at having a negative impact on her. Regardless of her levels of promiscuity.

  • Klara-Hitler
    Non-sense. All three of them.

    - Walking alone at night or in clubs is dangerous for both men and women and both of them are equally scared. Men (and not all of them) may be more physically ready to protect themselves against criminals, and women (not all of them) are generally physically less able to protect themselves. But the fear of being alone at night on the streets, where it is full of criminals doesn't know gender.

    - Completely nonsense. there is no evidence that women as a group have constant fear of all men as a group. Both men and women may have fears of certain groups in the opposite sex. If you fear all men, you should see a therapist.

    - Slut shaming is a non-issue.

    Employers have all the rights to demand the employees to wear appropriate cloths. It is their property and business, it will be their rules. If you feel that you don't like their rules, you can reject getting employed in there.

    School and university are places for education and shouldn't be by any means sexualized. Both men and women should have appropriate clothing. University isn't a place to show bottom and cleavage. You go to school and university, you cover yourself like a man does. A boy showing his thighs and chest is as inappropriate in school as a girl showing his boobs. stop complaining. Universities are filled with inappropriate sexual behaviours already. Giving unfettered freedom to students is impossible and harmful.

    Apart from that, "slut-shaming" if it means shaming promiscuity, is a positive thing. Promiscuity is extremely harmful for the society in many ways. Acceptance of promiscuity means deliberately harming the society.

    With or without shaming promiscuity, promiscuous people will exist. But by having promiscuity-shaming and recognising its harms in the culture, we can manage to stop some of the children from choosing that harmful path. And that is absolutely a good thing.
    Like 5 People
    • mikemx55

      MHO right here.

      Seriously, I'm even glad that a woman posted this.

  • Riri5129
    Every woman wants equal rights until they hit a man. Then we are "vulnerable" and the man is considered a "coward"
    If I ever hit a man I would say it's his right to hit me back. Equal force though, and not continuasly hitting
    Like 4 People
    • Anonymous

      I agree that it's a problem, whenever a guy says he doesn't hit girls and girls agree with him I feel icky. women can be abusers too, women can beat men up too, I never said they couldn't

  • hellionthesage
    Well the first two are how women feel which is irrelevent to how things are. 80% of all violent crime victims are male ie its men who need to be concerned not women (in fact if we get technical its also men who are more likely to be abused by men and women (men are more likely to suffer from domestic violence then women). So how women feel is irrelevent to what is. Further more those feelings are actually caused in a large part by feminism (yes feminism not femnazis) because they pereptuate the stereotype that men are violent (partially true, however male violence is directed at other males, not just a little massively ie almost never is a woman harmed by a man. the same cannot be said of men being harmed by women though). So when feminist run their ad campaigns declaring real men don't rape or "don't be that guy"(antidate rape campaign) what they are saying is the majority of men either rape or don't realize they are rapist (ironic since according to the CDC and NCVS women rape men at the same rates, and thats only from what we can tell in a society that routinley tells us women are victims men are oppressors (again feminist to blame) and that men cannot be raped) which is completely inaccurate since only about 4-5% of the entire population of men are responsible for all rape and the vast majority of sexual assaults commited against women by men. All of this is done and promoted by feminist and feminism which creates a false sense of fear which is not backed by statistical (or even ancedotal) evidence. Meanwhile men very much have something to fear yet no one really cares, again feminism has capatilized on that (hence your claim that we are equal in rights is incorrect as men have very few rights and women have all of them). So both of those are inaccurate. As for slut shaming, their is a reason for it. Self indulgence is not a good thing, we know its unhealthy it leads to abortions and Std's (look at sweden they have over 50% abortion rate and are the std capital of the western/industrialized world (only beaten out just barely by south africa). Then of course you have the marriage failure rate.
    Like 2 People
    • Chances of divorce go up with partner count (1% with one partner 16% with two) as do rates of depression, cheating (those who score in the upper half of the sociosexually unrestricted scale (ie promiscuis) have a 50% divorce/cheating rate) reduction in relationship satisifaction etc all of which make long term relationships incredibly difficult to maintain which is damaging not just to men (divorce laws cater to women with 80% of child support/alimony being awarded to the woman as well as the same rates of recieving child custody ie he loses his money his home and his children) but to children (80% of inmates come from single mother homes, children of divorce have higher rates of suicide depression substance abuse, criminal activity and divorce themselves (thus perpetuating the problem)) and by extention to society. This is why slut shaming exists. we shame those who are self destructive, we shouldn't simply ignore it otherwise they drag the society down with them.

    • As for the definition of feminism, fem (female) ism (ideology) or more accurately a female centric ideology (as if society was not already gynocentric enough). Most describe it as equal rights for women, which of course excludes men from it making it female focused. Which is actually more accurate then what your stating since most of the legal injustices men face are directly because of feminism (violence against women act (men are more likely to be victims of domestic violence) custody rights (women get custody significantly more then men and men have no recourse (this contributes to the male suicide rate doubling after divorce (and considering a man is already 4x more likely to commit suicide thats bad) the complete absence of reproductive rights for men etc). So no, the definition of feminism is female centric ideology where in feminist demand more rights and privledges for women, which they have been quite succesful with.

  • AleDeEurope
    This applies to everyone, though.
    Men are more prone to get jumped and murdered than women, so technically we should be more scared to walk alone at night than women.

    Being scared of men just because we're men is kinda stupid, it's like guys being scared of women for the wrong doings of a few. Plus, any gender can simply pull out a knife/gun and kill you.

    Slut shaming happens to both genders. If not, just look at all the posts of women talking negatively about fuckboys. I can't even tell you how many girls have stayed away from me because they thought I was a player/fuckboy. If you think slut shaming only happens to women... you're kinda contributing to the slut shaming against men.

    I think you need to spend more time with men, get to know us better.
    Like 7 People
    • Anonymous

      men more than often are the ones that go and kill someone, just look at the stats of mass shootings and murders.
      but men aren't scared to walk alone, that's the thing. women are taught since birth that we should be scared, and seeing all the reports of women getting kidnapped or raped while taking a walk outside is making it even scarier.

    • So because men are the ones that kill more, I shouldn't have to feel scared? I'm not responsible for what other men do.
      Men aren't scared to walk alone, but we're more likely to be a victim of a violent crime. Maybe you should stop being so scared, especially since you're less likely to be a victim.

  • Mustachekitteh
    Most of what's in this take I don't agree with. Since it's a problem for anyone no matter the gender.

    When ever I go into dark places alone this is what's going on in my head. Doesn't matter who is around, just the fact that it's dark and I'm alone is bad enough. For all I know a rabid dog could come out and get me.

    Then if anyone gives me a creepy look or tries following me, I just give them the, "I will kill you the second you get over here and rip your eyes out."

    My paranoia isn't over the fact that I'm a chick, it's over the fact that I'm extremely short. So someone might want to take advantage of the fact that I'm short. Which again I won't go down unless I take they're eyes with me out of they're heads. :D

    I went to this bar once with friends. Me and this chick ended up dancing at one part and we were the only ones. Yeah majority of the people there were older men but none of them came near us or bothered us.
    Like 1 Person
  • AbleLearner
    There is no clear answer to your complain in this civilization or much of any other.

    I am a man, and I don't go to bars or clubs because I don't want to be around drunk men or drunk women. Maybe you should consider the same.

    Your paranoid defense mechanisms you are programmed with literally hurt the good guys who try to love you, and they do very little to protect you from the evil ones, except for the "buddy rule" you are right.

    Guess what?

    You can never fully trust anyone anyway.

    It's a sad and unfortunate fact of life.

    I can love someone with all of my being, and if they don't want me there's nothing to it.

    There are cases of people being together for 5 or 10 years, and then one of them snapping and killing the other, and it is not always the man who snaps either.

    That's how life has always been.

    I honestly don't know how I'm supposed to trust any of you to sleep with you, you scare the hell out of me, in spite of my feelings... and you don't do anything to help fix the problem when your fellow females treat the best guy in the neighborhood like a piece of garbage.

    You know, hyper-liberal laws actually enable the perverts who prey on women?

    There was a time when rape was an automatic death sentence. That was going a bit too far, but now they get a slap on the wrist, and get out of prison sooner than a drug addict. That is caused by liberal judges and liberal law makers, often the very same people who support "feminism".

    You get worshiped by ordinary men, and even the best of men, and I have to repent of idolatry at times and I'm still a virgin for goodness sake, but you hold the evil of a few people against all men, but you know it's not all men's fault, but you can't help but instinctively blame all men anyway.

    I'm not a woman, and I've only ever had one beer and don't miss it, so I don't know what it's like to be on either end of the drunk groper thing.

    Fact is I'm entirely too much of a gentleman, which is exactly why I get rejected by every woman in town. That's for another thread, but I don't know what to tell you.

    If you want to catch a fish go fishing, if you want to catch a snake go where the snakes are.

    "Do everything in moderation" gets pretty hard to do sometimes when governments promote the very things that lead to violence, sexual crimes, and deadly accidents.
    • Now let me explain how screwed up it feels to be a man:

      You can do everything your whole life the way the female dating "expert" tells you to do it, and it does not work.

      Another guy can go on the dating site and write to a woman, nothing more than "You're fuckable," and she'll send him her phone number immediately.

      I've had as many as 6 women file false police reports against me simultaneously on the same day for talking about God actually. I was accused of stalking and following one of them home, and if not for closed circuit video from the Wendys where I was eating, the police might well have believed them. They grilled me for about 2 hours. I was expelled from the technical school where I was attending, even though the police knew the women were lying about it.

      THAT is how it feels to be a man.

      I tried to get lawyers to sue them for defamation, and everyone refused the case.

      THAT is how it feels to be a GOOD man and try your God given best to do everything right.

    • Take a martial Arts class, preferrably Isshinryu, I was a black belt candidate in that style before I had to quit, and I was equivalent of about 2nd degree in other styles based on people transferring and such.

      A Black Belt won't beat everything, but it's a lot better than nothing, and knowing hot to fight for real, instead of the BS they do in some fake styles, just might buy you the time to get away from the pervert long enough to get to your car or whatever.


      Like I said, no perfect solution to that problem, because that's how life is sadly.

      Now you just got promoted from white belt to black belt candidate.

      Preferably find an instructor who is ex-marine, and he'll teach you how to beat any man in a fight, at least for the first 10 seconds or so. You break his esophagus and kick his face in, and he'll "go away".

    • Now let me explain something.

      Hitting a guy in the face or the stomache or solar plexus or even the groin sometimes does not work unless you get a lucky knockout.

      If you are going to defend yourself against a man you have to break bones, you have to crush the throat, you have to rip his eyes out of their sockets literally.

      If you have your High Heels, take them off and nail him in the temples with it.

      Weapon of opportunity.

      That's self defense.

      Kata might be a black belt condition, but it won't save your life or dignity in the street.

      Break the fool's neck.

    • Show All
  • loveisbeautiful
    First, I want to say fear is a powerful motivater and if you let it control you, you'll miss out on a lot of things. I say this from personal experience, the biggest thing that prevents me from doing pretty much anything in life, is fear. It's one of the most powerful feelings there is, aside from love of course. But, one has to control the fear. Can't let the fear control you (something I'm working on changing myself).

    Now, with that in mind I just want comment a bit on your three points.

    1. In general terms I think it's just good practice for anyone (male or female), to not walk alone at night or go to clubs and stuff alone. This isn't the 70's era that my parents met in, when things were relatively safer. People are crazy and unpredictable. So, it just makes sense for people travel in groups and know their surroundings. It's just good practice to be cautious.

    2. I myself was never taught to cautious of men, but instead strangers in general. I think to blindly trust anyone you don't know, is naïve. However, to never trust any man because of who he might become, is wrong too. The best thing is to trust your gut and let it lead you in the right direction.

    Now, some advice for 1 & 2. If women are scared to walk alone and scared of men, why not get the upper hand and find a way to protect yourself by taking a self defense class or pay attention to where you are and what's around you and what would make a good weapon if you find yourself in dangerous spot and need to get away. Have a plan in your mind for just in case you're in danger. To have a plan, is never a bad thing.

    3. I don't really know much about "slut shaming" but girls can be mean especially to each other. And, people in general like to make random assumptions and judgments about people they don't even know based on what they see but not what they know. So, as sad as it is to say, that's really just life in general.
  • Azara
    This isn't stuff no one talks about. it's just when they talk a bout it they all it feminist propaganda or say men have it worse or just accept it.

    by the way the way people talk about so called feminazi today is the exact same way feminism was attacked during its conception. There is always going to be people trying to demonize a caused it's not new. There enough point in distinguishing between a so called feminazi and feminism bc feminism is not based on fascism. Once you've gone there you are in a totally different sphere where the word feminism Becomes obsolete. If a Nazi calis themselves a feminist and someone takes that seriously, the shame is on the person who took it seriously a Nazi will say and believe whateber bc they are malfunctioning. There are human beings walking Round thinking they are nobikigy from 1655... Doesn't mean they are. I could say im the stay puff marshmallow man... Doesn't make it so.

    I do agree the same along alone thing should not be a big deal and it is.

    It isn't that women are taught to fear men it's that men are taught its ok to try to co from women. like its "manly" .. even gag encourages that. In one form or another and they think it's ok bc of how they sell it.. but when it come to power it's not the form that's the salient features but the principal.

    Slit shaming is justified by the belief that Women and men being different means they are different in whatever way anyone feels like saying.. a lot like the nazi problem. Saying it doesn't - make it so. And saying it a lot with a lot of people doesn't get you closer to making it so but it does generate a lot if propaganda. Much like the anti feminist movement in early feminism
  • Shutupman
    Hahaha @ those first 2...
    Sorry but no, being scared of being by yourself in a club or place is ridiculous. I've been out to places by myself or ended up alone, never caused problems. Why not? If someone is being a dickhead, cause hey who knows yre in a club full of drunk people, you could always tell em to leave you alone or to fuck off. This kind of fear is being planted in little girls by their parents/social environment cause women are oh so fragile and not able to stand up for themselves.
    second one being scared of men? Really? Again socially constructed fear. Yes men on average commit more crimes but to put it in perception obviously most guys you meet or know will not wanna rape you. Not every man is a rapist, being cautious around people is never stupid though but being straight out afraid? Such bullshit.

    And the 3d well yes that's true, but what males do so do women. We sexually objectify men too, no one cares though.

    Why? Cause feminism is bullshit especially in western countries.
    equalism is far more constructive yet never 100% attainable.
    Like 1 Person
    • I agree with her, but I agree with this mostly. I <3 being alone even at night. I feel safer because if something happens other people won't panic.

  • AllThatSweetJazz
    1. This is not just women, men feel it too and men are at greater risk. You're literally the safest demographic. Being afraid doesn't mean there's something to be afraid of.

    2. After what you just described, you think men don't have to deal with this "constant fear of men"? I beg to differ - and again, being afraid doesn't mean it's at all likely that something could go wrong. So consider that perhaps the real issue is not that men are scary, but that you are scared when you shouldn't be.

    3. As if men don't get shamed for their sexuality.
    You complain about not being allowed to wear a dress like that, while men are obligated to wear suit and long sleeve button shirts with ties. They have to cover everything but their hands and head in the same situations where you want women to wear whatever they want. I don't care about the dress or what women wear but think about the other side before you complain.

    Stop people who are crazy from calling themselves feminists, that will sort out that issue. If you're trying to convince people, if you're trying to establish yourself as this thing, then the onus is on *you* to remove the weeds from your garden; your movement either needs figure out how to distinguish yourselves from these people to call yourselves something different. Until then, these people will continue to represent you.

    By the way there are many people who try say they are for equality and aren't feminazis but continue to push for things that are stupid or awful - and I believe them when they say they are feminists. Saying oh they're not real feminists doesn't make that go away - and every feminist faction says that. Yet other than TERFs, white feminism, and intersectional feminism, there aren't many lines that distinguish one self-identified feminist from another - certainly no clearly labeled factions that make it known who wants actual equality and isn't dumb af.

    Take Anita Sarkeesian for example. I wouldn't call her a radical feminist or feminazi, but I totally disagree with everything coming out of her face and think she's awful. I don't care about 'feminazis', everyone can see they're crazy for wanting to keep men in camps or something, but they are a largely harmless minority, 'feminists' are the real concern.
    LikeDisagree 2 People
  • DaddyRollingStone
    No, trust me, we hear about these problems all the fucking time.

    1. I can't help that you're scared when you walk alone at night. I get scared too but I don't complain about it every chance I get - hell, I don't even talk about it at all.
    2. Again, we can't help the way you feel. It sounds like your parents sheltered you too much and aided with too many huffington post articles you have an irrational fear of anyone with a penis. Maybe you would be less afraid if you saw men as people rather than potential suspects for violent crimes.
    3. I don't understand how you can honestly believe that when women post their bodies online all they receive is negative attention. Just go on any model's page and you'll see hundreds of men drooling over her in the comments section of every post. Don't really know what to tell you about women who are mean to each other though, that's outside of my jurisdiction.
    Also, if your place of employment has a dress code that you refuse to follow then you may face disciplinary action, including getting fired. The rules apply to everyone!
    Like 2 People
  • Rock_Steakface
    1) Men are much more likely to be the victim of a violent crime while out at night, be it robbery, assault or even murder. I used to hear the gunshots all the time in my old neighborhood. And it's not even close to the first time I've heard any of these things, so 'no one talks about it' is so blatantly false that a part of my brain died trying to process it.

    2) Seriously? You're afraid all men everywhere might snap at any given moment because you got the stranger danger talk as a kid? Believe it or not, men have better things to do than run up on unsuspecting women and smack the shit out of them. 'Look, a woman! I gotta exert my dominance! DO YOU EVEN LIFT, BRAH?'

    We've got jobs to worry about. We've got healthy ways of relieving anger and pent up stress that don't involve physical assault on the nearest woman in sight. If I get the feeling a woman is terrified of me, I leave her alone and never look back. Why? Because she'll never trust me and I don't have the patience to win her over.

    3) Most of the slut shaming comes from other women, you know. This country hasn't had a puritan problem for several decades now. In fact, most guys love sluts, they fork over the sex without much trouble. Women on the other hand DON'T LIKE COMPETING WITH SLUTS.

    In conclusion: you're full of shit, OP.
    Disagree 1 Person
  • KittieCat
    As a woman/girl living in one of America's most dangerous cities, I've never experienced the 1st issue. Drunks shouldn't be your problem and looking feminine shouldn't be the cause. Walking alone at night is probably the number one way to ask to get mugged or anything else regardless of gender. If you do walk alone and take a dumb route or don't know how to defend yourself, then you're at least partially at fault if something happens.

    For the second one, I find it to be on the fence. Understand that you choose to (for the work scenario) work there and have to dress appropriately. Like anything people will stare and be mind blown by a booty or whatever and sure it isn't fair but it's a part of life and life isn't fair. I wish people wouldn't be turned on as much by a butt or some cleavage but what are you gonna do?

    You sound rather paranoid regarding men. You shouldn't be scared of them at all. And who cares if they're stronger, doesn't mean a lot if they can't apply that strength. If you're seriously that worried, learn how to defend yourself
    • Anonymous

      so let me get this straight, all women should go to karate classes and be top wrestlers just in case some rapist confronts them at the middle of the night? to me it sounds easier to just teach young boys to not be jackasses.

    • KittieCat

      I think everyone should know how to defend themselves not only women. A rapist is far different than a jackass and rape isn't just some guy or chick being an asshole, it's way worse. Anyways if you put yourself in a potential situation where you need to defend yourself, you should probably know how

    • Blonde401

      @kittiecat I agree with you, MyTake Owner, it's a very nice idea to think one day we will live in a world where there are no creeps and of course we should teach guys not to be creeps but that doesn't mean women shouldn't be prepared. You can only look out for yourself, if you're scared, go to self defence classes - your life is so much better when you're not in perpetual fear.

  • OlderAndWiser
    I have been chastised for using the word slut and I really don't understand it. I don't get in anyone's face and call them names. I don't call a girl a slut because she wears a short skirt or a revealing bikini. I THINK a girl looks slutty if she is dressed like a stereotypical streetwalker, and I THINK that a girl is a slut if she had 6-8 sexual partners in one year, but I also THINK that a guy is a slut if he has the same track record. Still, I don't chase after people to tell them that they are sluts. No one hears my opinion unless they ask for it. So. . . is that slut shaming?
    Like 8 People
  • SnatchFinderGeneral
    Literally nothing you said just affects women, or is a real problem.

    If you are ashamed of being called a slut, don't be a slut.

    The other things are just solipsitic rubbish as if women are the only vulnerable people in vulnerable situations.
    Like 1 Person
    • Anonymous

      how is wearing a swimsuit at the beach being a slut? because I've seen way too many people calling girls who post beach selfies sluts on social media.
      women obviously aren't the only ones vulnerable, but they are most vulnerable.

    • I never said wearing a swimsuit at the beach is being a slut. Because it's not. Lol. Am I supposed to be sorry that your friends are idiots or muslim? Or are these not even your friends and nobody you actually know has ever said that?

  • Blonde401
    I walk home alone at night and I'm not scared of men at all. I know men can be scary but I'm not scared of them. I'm a black belt in jujitsu and I walk with my key between my knuckles. Not scared, just prepared.
    Like 2 People
    • mikemx55

      The key trick! Yeah, I do that too!

    • Blonde401

      @mikemx55 it's a good trick. Hit someone hard enough, it really takes them by surprise.

    • mikemx55

      Oh, and just remember that the black belt is better than nothing, but the streets have no rules, or judges.

    • Show All
  • RandomBritishGuy94
    1) You can't walk alone at night or be alone at clubs -

    This isn't much different for men in most areas. Being attacked at night isn't a women thing in a bad area. If it's everywhere it links into my second point.

    2) Constant fear of men

    That's called paranoia. Well I understand what you mean you ruin it by saying "even if you think he's your friend,". I'm sorry but you should have some men in your life you trust. We're all people, like women, who are different from each other. We aren't ticking time bombs who blow up when we get angry and hurt women. In general do women react badly to you as well? I don't see the difference. any friend, any decent person, isn't going to attack you because "they got angry".

    3) Slut shaming

    I'll give you this. Man have the same problem when people tell us to "man up". No f**k off. I'll act however I want as long as I'm not effecting others.
    Like 2 People
    • mistixs

      Most men who abuse women are men whom they're close to, and trust.

    • Anonymous

      the thing is it's hard to trust men, especially if you live at an environment where everyday there's a report of a girl being abused or raped by her husband or boyfriend, or even guy friend. it's nothing personal against you.
      it's like walking into a den of lions, there are lions who are just like little kitties who just want you to pet them and nap with them, but even as kids we know that many lions attack and kill, so we're scared to approach any lion, even if we're told it's a friendly one.

    • zagor

      Maybe because women seem to seek out men who have those properties? A while back I was talking with a friend who has trouble getting a girl; he is average-looking, is a very nice, laid-back guy, is employed, and is not socially awkward or shy. His younger brother treats women like dirt, picks up another one before he has dumped the last... and has girls all over him.

  • jaxxten
    All of this is based on one simple problem. And you even said so in your take. Little girls get brainwashed into thinking men are evil and will hurt them. Are men stronger (physically) than women? Yes. Will some grope you if drunk? Maybe. Does that mean you are left alone? hell no. You WILL instantly be backed up by many people, men and women alike, and the bad ones will be far outnumbered by good ones. But the good ones are never talked about.
  • mikemx55
    What if I told you, that if a man walks down a suspicious street, he will also get a bit scared?
    Regardless of being with friends or not.
    We're not super brave just cause we're men. And assaults occur more to men, cause we usually carry more cash.

    In the old days, women were victims for golden rings, necklasses etc, but now all they wear is plastic...

    And keep your keys between your knuckles
  • Show More (68)