What Women Need To Feel vs. What Men Need To See

[LittleSally]

Now, most guys, despite claiming they understand or try to understand women, seem to believe women get as much of a sexual pleasure just from seeing them - like they do from seeing women.

Dispelling the misconception: NOPE! Not true. Not even close. Never happened, never will.

Why?

While men are visual beings women are more tactile + mental beings when it comes to sexual attraction. it's just what it is... We didn't ask for it, but we got it.

You can say it's easier for you...which, in part, might be true, but it's also harder [no pun intended]. While you do get aroused much quicker, you are also, a lot of the time, cursed with this - getting aroused by almost nothing, being aroused too often, how do you hide it, what do you do? Is it worth the bother? That's for each of you to decide.

While you get turned on by seeing breasts, hips, butts, vaginas...basically any naked part of a woman's body, we aren't the same.

Now...what turns a woman on?

It's simpler than you might think.

While some of you are savants and already know what I'm going to write, this is for all you guys who are still living in doubt and concern of how to one day turn on your lady:

1. Be funny, make her laugh. Oh yes, the ultimate aphrodisiac. Anyone who says this isn't true...isn't worth a bang. (But seriously, do it in a loving relationship...)

2. Be a good person with an edge, someone who's not afraid to be sterne when need be, but also display your kind side from time to time. She wants to know she's not dating a bad person. (Now, this excludes the emotionally damaged women who still go for the 'emotionally challenged bad boy'...but you already knew that.)

3. Touch her firmly and with obvious intent. Now...depends on the girl, what she likes and on her mood at the time, but - almost every woman will tell you she likes this...80% of the time.

To conclude: Yes, looks matter, but you aren't going to get any women (not talking about teenagers) sexually aroused by standing there without a shirt OR pants on... It takes more than that.

[COCOCHANEL]

i want security, a relationship and all the things that come with it and i like writing erotica but to be quite honest the physical appearance of the man is the most important thing to me.

[Iron_Man]

Nice mytake my friend. The best way to a woman's heart is vacations! Proper housing and nice cars. They want Security in my opinion

[NonCreativeUsername]

Yo friend

[lilac_flowers]

lol no

[Iron_Man]

Oh then what makes you happy?

[lilac_flowers]

I don't know. Many things do. Many things in unison that make a man acceptable to me after weighing all his pros and cons against my personal taste in humans. Like most women: Empathy, wisdom and leadership skill i. e. being in charge in the relationship, all in combination, is the most important part of it all. Then followed by someone I can connect to emotionally, intellectually, spiritually, someone I can respect for their abilities and character. Like say a poor physicist with a relatively small income who is dedicated to what he does, is thousand times more preferable, to say a Saudi prince whose only quality is a rich dad. But then I take a moment to consider your idea and imagine any ordinary, average guy I don't have feelings for offering me vacations and housing and cars as his main selling point... He repulses me instantly.

[Iron_Man]

@lilac_flowers Ok how about dating a hard working low income construction worker that is very loving? Will this please you for the rest of your life?

[Iron_Man]

I mean how about marrying one

[lilac_flowers]

@Iron_Man It would not in 90% of the cases. I say this because I believe there to be so many exceptions, but where I live at least, all those men have very low IQs. I would not be able to connect with any of them and would see them as my inferiors, thus loose all attraction for them because this would destroy my sense of safety (feeling protected by my partner). Even if you poured a pile of money on heads of those men and made them rich, nothing would change. Nor does the fact that he is "very loving" matter. If I don't see him as superior to me, my female instinct tells me: BACK OFF! Now if a man is smart and a construction worker for some reason, sure I have no issue with that. Such a man, even if he never succeeded due to sheer bad luck, would have no intention of remaining in such low pay, hard labor for the rest of his life for no reason so I would gladly gamble on him if he was someone I can connect with. And I would "gamble" perfectly fine with winning poverty.

[Iron_Man]

You seem kind of back and forth in your thought patterns. I pretty much rest my case on how women really want security and to be taken care of

[lilac_flowers]

I never said they don't. But it is not a primary concern. It is a benefit like any other. If it's primary concern, that's gross.

[Iron_Man]

I feel many women make it the first priority or they don't bother with the guy

[thetundrawolf]

Thank you!!

[Tdieseler]

"3. Touch her firmly and with obvious intent. Now... depends on the girl, what she likes and on her mood at the time, but - almost every woman will tell you she likes this...80% of the time."
--touch her firmly intentBREAKDOWN:--
--... depends on the girl and what she likes
_.. on her mood at the time
--almost every woman
--80% of the time.
This is the reason why men will never understand women... and thats why real men stop trying to understand are just MEN, fuck the bullshit.
Just on one point, ONE point in the article (which is pretty informative but damn near inapplicable in the real world, too incomplete)... the point "touch her with intent", men have to not only consider if thats what SHE likes, but IF she's in the mood, also that ALMOST every woman likes it but out of that almost, ONLY 80% of the time... and we are supposed to do all this calculation in our head and just know. Just like how a girl says leave me alone, then later on comes back to say i didn't want you to... then the fuck you say it for?
If i have to consider all those things, AND time it right as well... then im not even interested in what she is feeling. I stopped caring about how they feel and I tell you what, it worked out way better than when i used to be the stooge reading articles that explain what women want... the day i put the "I don't give a fuck" tape on those articles was the day that i realized what women wanted. That tape lol. They took care of the "feelings" department on their own when they knew it wasn't available over here.
Am i missing anything fellas @Negrodamuss @OlderAndWiser @Bandit74 @themasterplan @skeptic002

[Negrodamuss]

think you covered all the bases!

[Tdieseler]

@Negrodamuss and i also got a down vote which mean Im on the right track. I love it when i get female down votes on here... you do know there is a club right, consisting of guys who because we do our own thing and have the "don't give a fuck tape" on... we get female down votes. We literally compete to see who can get the most. because it means thats the guy that is most on point. So far, im winning. The most i ever got was 13.

[Negrodamuss]

Haha, yeah I know what you mean! I think my max lady downvotes wax 20

[OlderAndWiser]

One of the irritating aspects of all this is that, if you try to understand women, you quickly realize there is no logic and no consistency to female behavior, but women will act as if something is wrong with US because we didn't know how they were feeling or what they were thinking. A man trying to understand a woman is like a hungry, wild bird trying to understand a domesticated dog.

[Tdieseler]

@Negrodamuss DAAAANG!!! I've gotta introduce you to the crew immediately... im not sure if mine was thirteen... i just remember a "1" and a squiggle... could have be 18 (i was drunk, brings out the true honesty) but i chose to say 13, don't wanna be over ambitious. but the next in line only had 9... so... bruh... u gotta join the competition lol... @OlderAndWiser You never fail to impress sir... they know full well we are chill and laid back but they want us to figure out all that nonsense about them. And you know what the funny thing is, the guys that do get them quite well (like me) when they come across us, they think we are "the one" for them, but don't realize they aren't the one for US. So they call us "players"... um.. duh. As for your analogy, i have one better... "trying to understand a woman is like trying to chase/catch a leaf blowing in the wind, it might be headed in a certain direction, but its gonna be everywhere while headed there" One of the many analogies I've created.

[OlderAndWiser]

Men are from Mars; women are from a parallel universe.

[Tdieseler]

@OlderAndWiser My motto is simply "Women are crazy"... worked for me after i became the jerk, worked when i was a player, worked for me after i stopped being a player, still works till today. Before that, i used to listen to my mom..."be nice to girls"... what a load.

[Dim_121]

Good mytake

[Tanuron]

I find it funny how all the women who has hit on me in life have said stuff like "I'm more of a visual person" while I never been myself. So yeah far from honestly, overall its pretty easy to turn girls on too, but are some women again, maybe those with lower sex drive who can be pretty tricky, cause often those who do, dont really have anything spesific that turn them on, maybe hence the low sexual drive. But for those or them, its so random really. It has to "feel" right, and that moment can be rare and far between.

You can be the most sweetest, intelligent, kind, edgy, funny etc, wouldn't make any difference, so my word of advice is to not try so hard, dont put so much time and energy into people who just won't see you the way you would want them to, they never will.

[Berethor]

I like how your put an picture of an quite tall man and then you say "Not true. Not even close. Never happened". Making her laugh, well unless he is an batman, then there is no need for that. :)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YpIQQeL2ZYk

[LittleSally]

I don't understand what you're saying...

[Berethor]

I am saying that being funny don't worth much if the guys is not tall. :)

[alphadoggystyle]

Most guys i would argue know this already, but this take is quite a failure for not mentioning one of the biggest aphrodisiacs for women, power/status/wealth (and these things are relative to the average man in the area/region).

Any combination of those traits (which often come as a package as they are somewhat correlated) will make many women look past looks and personality almost completely. So its to important to leave out.

[Scrambledagain]

Fully agree with you. Dude, I was the class clown, the funny dude at parties, I was even paid to make people laugh back in the day. I got into shit in class for creating my own funny comics. South Park style;) But that never got me women ever. I still have my awesome sense of humour and use it in business (it's an amazing ice breaker) but when I see a woman I like, I have to tone it down In order to project that dominance vibe. I did use my humour to get one girl though. Status counts as you Mentioned. So I use it to get a whole bunch of guys laughing so that I differentiate myself from the others. Made me look good;) she was in after that lol

[Femdomina]

Yeah, it's so true, cool MyTake :)

[Jjpayne]

Great mytake! It's always interesting to understand more about girls. It helps us guys be more sensitive to your wants and needs. I kind of knew this concept to an extend but you really expanded on it. The bold statements make it even better because it adds more truth, if you have more passion, it means it's something you care about. Thank you, go to know!

[Soulsky]

I'm very visual and can get turned on easily by a hot guy. Would I want to be in a serious relationship with him depends on all these things you described.

[ManOnFire]

I neither agree or disagree. I think there are more women out there who do get turned on visually than we're really aware of, yeah. At least that's been my experience. But as far as guys WANTING it to be that way for their sake? I don't really know. Seems to be that women want men to believe that there are harder doors to open in their sexuality than there really are, as if indicates that their sexuality is in some way more profound, intellectual, or receptive in some way that "men need to understand."

[saksaksakaway]

LittleSally if there is one thing I have learned about women and that is never try and figure them out just learn how to treat them

[ADFSDF1996]

So that means women don't like how men look.

[ADFSDF1996]

Women don't find men attractive/handsome.

[NonCreativeUsername]

Women find men repulsive beings.*

[Shorty1991]

@NonCreativeUsername lol no it doesn't, it means we take more into account than just good looks. We don't just get into relationships with men based on their looks, in terms of serious relationships. But looks are Ok for one night stands. Of course we find men attractive, but it takes more than good looks to pursue us. I've seen some attractive men take a non verbal interest in me but they never act on it so I just leave them be, if they are never capable of breaking the ice with me, I will not take them seriously.

[NonCreativeUsername]

@Shorty1991 But if you're mutually interested in that person, why do you wait for him to act on it? Why not you?

[Shorty1991]

@NonCreativeUsername what if they are only pieces of eye candy and I don't feel as strongly as they do about me. Plus they weren't my crushes, so I didn't act on them. I act on my own crushes, I get to know what I need to know about them first before I ask them out. Sadly my crushes were taken or they just didn't feel the same way about me when I got round to telling the single ones how I felt. "Why do I wait for them to act on it? Because they are the ones who displayed interest in me in the first place. Its hardly my fault that those guys lacked the balls to even speak to me. None of my crushes took me by the hand. I had to figure it all out myself when I was a teenager. Nice try though, great way for those shy guys to shift responsibilities onto other people because they need to be taken by the hand. Who ever has the crush should act on it first and its as simple as that. I think its pathetic when people need to be taken by the hand these days.

[Shorty1991]

The more they get taken by the hand, the less they learn to be able to improve on their confidence and initiate conversations with the people of their interest. They'll expect the same all the time, people initiating for them because they can't our of fear. I would rather be an Xbox widow than a substitute mother for some guy that's meant to be my boyfriend.

[ADFSDF1996]

@NonCreativeUsername I agree with you, women don't like how men look.

[Shorty1991]

We do, there's just more to it than what meets the eye.

[NonCreativeUsername]

@Shorty1991 Or you could just boil it down to the basics... making everything this complicated only makes you seem less approachable and more, for a lack of a better word, high maintenance. If you have an attraction towards someone then it's just a simple yes or no answer of approaching him/her. Not saying it's a bad thing, but considering present day society, it seems to be a big issue in most people's lives today taking into account the amount of people that feel it's better to label everything instead of leaving things be. No harm done though so do what you want.

[Shorty1991]

@NonCreativeUsername the only ones that over think it and overcomplicate it for themselves are the shy people. FYI I was approachable 3 years ago to one guy in particular, all he could do was give me successions of looks, follow me around and stand next to me pretending to look busy, rather than saying a simple "hello" this guy chose to dither about for the duration of two years rather than taking any verbal action at all. I didn't expect him to ask me out, all he had to do was talk to me and if I liked him enough afterwards. I would have probably asked him out on a date. There is a difference you know, you can find someone attractive without forming a crush on them. People who form crushes should be able to act on them. Its them who have the problem, not their crushes. Plus, 2 years ago there was another guy that used to follow me around at work, displaying all the same antics as the last guy I spoke about. I did a bit of homework on him and it turned out that he had a girlfriend.

[Shorty1991]

So maybe I'm just fed up of getting fucked about and guys playing stupid mind games with me.

[NonCreativeUsername]

@Shorty1991 I'm not telling you to throw yourself at every guy you find slightly attractive, nor am I advocating that you're obliged to open up to them. You just have to understand that there are two sides of the story. Like I tell and was told, not every guy that doesn't approach you is shy. And every guy that may seem quite "attached" may not have any intentions beyond befriending/getting to know you. If you really thought deeply what was going through people's heads' you'd change your perspective (s) drastically.

[Shorty1991]

@NonCreativeUsername By observing those guys antics, they had no intentions of befriending me. Its no where near as hard to befriend people as it is to ask them out because you have a crush or interest in them. So giving me successions of staring, following me around, occasionally standing next to me waiting to be taken by the hand and ogling me when they think I'm not looking. Hardly sounds like friendship material. I came to the conclusion that either they lacked the confidence or were already paired off. So I left them to it.

[rjroy3]

I take this with a grain of salt, but overall I agree for the most part. Taking a girl from zero to ready for sex does take more than a hard body, but a hard body can definitely be enough to get a girl aroused. And if she's already in a relaxed, fun state, in a good environment then a guy with a hard body who isn't a dumbass could very quickly get her aroused enough for sex. Without having to make her laugh, or show he's a good guy. Just showing intent would be enough. In general circumstances maybe not enough to say, "take me now". But it definitely gives you a large leap in that direction depending on the environment/her mood, which is likely at effect of said environment.

[rjroy3]

I'm not suggesting that being fit is necessary. Just that in the right circumstances those 3 necessary criterion for the most part become unnecessary outside of intent and that's because of the social expectation/want for the man to pursue.

[Saoirse_Nua]

I agree totally - I feel what you have to do is open your body and mind to stimulus - If you approach open to every level and communicate fully with your partner, it may sweeping like a sweeping statement but the only way is up - Like it is foolish to say everything is perfect but it must be in a high 90 percentile positive approach to have. I always find a good motto is "Receive pleasure by giving pleasure".

[HikerDude]

... and cash money. Nothing gets those emotions flowing like the dollar-green halo of filthy lucre.

[TheTruthHurtsImSorry]

You're right, women don't get turned on by looks like every woman I've ever met that has said the opposite. They really get turned by what the man has, what's really on the inside of his wallet.

[Browneye57]

Reasonable. It also helps if he's rich, right? LOL

Yes, the men are poor at game, and they are afraid of the girls, so they seem weak and supplicating - big turn off for the ladies.

Really, it's all your own fault. Just go around talking about 'feminism' and how 'independent' you are and you'll find all the weak beta guys that just hope if they're polite and nice you'll want to give them some sex.

[fueledbythc]

Number 2 is exactly how I act. But I'm not a bad boy.

[Scrambledagain]

I made an escort laugh hard with one of my Justin Bieber jokes. You right... it may work lol I got laid 😂

[TylerKuykendall]

What jokes do you have? Lol.

[Scrambledagain]

@TylerKuykendall dude I'm not gonna lie, it was fuckin funny. As soon as I said I was funny on here, my one girlfriend texted me that I was funny. I put the screenshot in my profile lol

[Scrambledagain]

@TylerKuykendall good humour and jokes come through clever plays on words and delivery of the material in the context of the situation.

[TylerKuykendall]

I was just curious what the joke was since it was so funny. Or do you not remember?

[Scrambledagain]

@TylerKuykendall happened 3 years ago. Don't remember much. She put on music in the background (as one does) and as I came out the shower to go to her naked, I heard Bieber and I carried on walking past her to the door. I remember her going "wtf you doing" and that's when I made fun of Bieber and we had some fun banter. I told her she would lose business if she kept doing that. I just remember her laughing her arse off. My time went way over but she didn't mind. See, escorts have fun with me;)

[Scrambledagain]

Just throwing it out there again. Got another "you're funny" message. I know one thing. Woman don't fuck clowns my end of story lol Why do you think pennywise was so pissed all the time? 🎈 ... they all float...

[Negrodamuss]

You did a good job with this. It's pretty much 100% correct. Hopefully some guys on here are taking notes