Sexual Relationships
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Girls, Should We Just Give Up On Sex?

As in intercourse. There are statistics for women having trouble with orgasming from it, and lots of women say they love foreplay more anyway since it gives the best orgasms.

I've been really thinking about this. For me, I think I could at least try to have a foreplay-only sex life. I want to see what it feels like to be intimate without intercourse.

Girls, Should We Just Give Up On Sex?

I know people might reply and say that I won't find a boyfriend, but I like really getting to know him before sex anyway. Otherwise if we disagree on any big things, I won't know until we talk a lot. I feel like if we hit it off then he'll want me. Or he may love my idea, you never know.

And I still know this is sexual activity. So before anyone says anything: Yes, I know we're still partners and we are basically having sex. This isn't to get my partner count down. I'm serious.

I like looking at the pros and cons, and to me it's like: Oral can get me and him off and feels amazing. Fingers can be wider than a dick and can honestly last as long as I want them to. What reason is there to have sex?

Our intimacy can be from our relationship...I feel like you can have deep intimacy without sex.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • The single best way to get off during sex -- more frequently, more consistently, and HARDER -- is to BE A SELFISH LOVER.
    In other words... to approach sex in **exactly** the same way as most BOYS do.

    Like just think about it for a sec.
    Most boys, when they approach sex, are PRIMARILY just... looking to get off.
    It would not be an exaggeration to say that sex, for MOST boys, is basically just "masturbation, but using a girl instead of their own hand".
    ... And you know what?
    Boys get off. They get off every damn time.
    Partly because it's easier for them to get off -- but MOSTLY because **they make damn well sure** that they're going to get off.

    Even in the case of boys who are "all about pleasuring the woman"... still, 99 percent of the time, they will make absolutely sure that They Get Theirs.
    Can you imagine these boys -- even though they claim to be "all about pleasing the woman" -- being perfectly content with not having their OWN orgasm most of the time? Or ever? Ahahaha of course you can't.

    --

    So...
    ... yeah.

    THAT is how you should start approaching all this.

    You should approach sex... like a boy.

    __

    BEFORE you start turning this corner...

    * If you don't know yr OWN body well enough to get *yourself* off consistently... Girl! Do yr fuckin homework!
    (where "fuckin homework" is meant in the most literal sense possible)
    ... in other words... Go fuck yrself.
    In the good way.
    Over and over and over again, until YOU figure out how to get YOURSELF off.
    Because no boy is gna have the patience to unlock all these levels if you can't unlock them yrself.

    __

    Once you've passed the "know yrself" class:

    * Make it ALL about YOUR pleasure. And I mean ALL of it.
    (You'd be surprised how many boys will just start to go right along with this vibe... if YOU set the vibe strongly enough.)

    * Don't give a shit whether the boy gets his orgasm.
    He's gna nut anyway. Why worry?

    * Start thinking of sex as... masturbation. Start thinking of boys as really, really, REALLY well-made -- and oh so fucking beautiful -- sex toys.
    Coincidence that boys rhyme with toys?
    I think not.
    <3

    * Take all the knowledge you have of how to get YOURSELF off... and keep using it... and just *enhance* it, by adding all the things a boy can do FOR YOU that you can't physically -- or psychologically -- do for yrself.

    Oh fuck yeah.

    I'm a selfish bitch by nature anyway -- but, soon as I started thinking this way, I always, ALWAYS got off.

    And boys LOVE it, too.

    • Well said! I also ALWAYS get off :D

    • @flypaper Tx girl :*

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What Girls & Guys Said

18 42

  • Uhh... no?
    Sex is like the ultimate form of intimacy. Of course it's not the only one, but what would make your relationship differ from two people who are just friends of the opposite sex if the only intimate moments that you shared were doing non-sexual things?

    I feel so much closer to my boyfriend in more way than one through sex. I can cum from just piv but, even if I don't that particular time, I'll still enjoy the session for the closeness alone.

  • Honestly... my boyfriend and I had sex somewhat early and really... it's not even about that... it's about not getting hung up on things and just getting to know each other? You develop intimacy by developing a connection... and to do that you have to let it be and enjoy the ride.

    Sometimes we have intimacy that involves sex and sometimes we don't... and there's no forcing about it. Maybe it's BECAUSE we already have sex without making it such an ordeal... that we have energy between us to develop the connection we have outside of it.

    Everything about the red text above describes us perfectly.

    I guarantee that the connection we have on a road trip with almost no radio from 9am to 9pm is not fueled by sex... it's fueled by our ability to enjoy one another and share ourselves. We lay together in the living room watching something and just... enjoy it. We team up on meals together... fueled by mutual enjoyment for cooking. (:cough: and eating) Ad infinitum.

    And every day... at some point... I have a moment of pure recognition, and gratitude, and love... without so much as a kiss to trigger it.

    Despite that fact that he and I have unusually high sex drives... we do a whollllle lot of... not having sex... happily.

    Trust me when I say... no amount of forcing conditions on a relationship is going to give you what you claim to seek. It comes by... JUST... LOVING someone and letting them love you back.

  • It really all depends on if you can find a partner willing to live that type of lifestyle with you. I actually really enjoy penetrative sex, because it ties into my personal fetishes. I love being dominated. I just had some of the best sex ever with my boyfriend the other night. Which a lot of that did do with the fact that he focuses on foreplay as well! But I know that penetrating me is what gets him off. He is one of the few men who doesn't really care for his dick being sucked. It feels great to him! But it's not the something that guarantees his pleasure. So yeah, different strokes for different folks.

  • Uh NO thank you. I climax from intercourse and get the best orgasms from it, and even when I don't Im still satisfied, to me having an orgasm isn't a complete necessity, I enjoy the sex Im having with my man anyway cause it still feels good. I honestly prefer intercourse over foreplay too tbh. Of course you can have deep intimacy without sex and I rather have both than take on away.

    • Must be nice. I've never had a single one, even from oral.

  • We have all oral sex all the time here and it works great. We both love it. You just need the right guy to make it work. :)

    • Is it a boyfriend or hubby?

    • Husband.

    • That sounds awesome. And you've been together awhile?

    • Show All

  • Yes. You should.

  • I would not want to give up intercourse, but great sex should be 90% foreplay and "afterplay"

  • I completely disagree but just add more foreplay not that hard.

  • Simple solution...
    Just get a bigger dick... :)
    I can refer a few...

  • This is why I find Lesbian intimacy so much more emotionally rewarding and satisfying than being fucked by a man. Sure being fucked feels good while it's happening but there's no emotional connection for me. If I could find the right Lesbian I'd close the door on men.

    • tse1.mm.bing.net/th

    • how can't there be any emotional connection you wouldn't feel that way if a cancer man made love to you I can guarantee ya

    • @CancerianMan81 And just what is so special about a cancer man?

    • Show All

  • What if your partner smells bad? Would you stop breathing?

  • Foreplay only? You do realize that what your asking is that he ask you out, he wine and dine you, he the gives you foreplay (because lets be perfectly honest foreplay is geared towards women not men) and then he. . . gets nothing. That's not really a reasonable response. If you don't want sex don't have a relationship with a person who is any type of sexual other then asexual.

  • I think you've given this some real thought and what's you want sounds entirely reasonable and practicable... but there is a big other question mark over the other half of this decision.. I know there must be a guy out there that feels sorta the same as you do but will he tick all the other boxes and this? ... the way I see it a partner can be mounded to what one wants sexually but they have to be your absolute best friend... good luck on your quest , I mean that sincerely ;)

  • agree that you want a good relationship and connection... sex is not a foundation for anything long lasting. then some of everything.

    girls would say this though... that you can have deep intimacy without sex. sex is about as intimate physically as you can get. Guys are wired for sex, so yes, saying no to intercourse will eliminate a lot of guys, there would be some takers. lets be honest, if all the foreplay is good enough, you will want the intercourse. anyway.

  • I completely disagree with you. It is true that most women can't climax with intercourse (75%) there are women that enjoy it anyway and women who want to please their partner. I'm not saying we should be doing things we don't enjoy but when you are in a relationship you might do things that your partner enjoy more and vise versa.

  • If she only wanted oral instead of sex most of the time I would be ok with it as long as he did it back to me in some way too.

  • HI, why are saying this?
    cuz
    We have a dick and it usually don''t matter in which you hole you put it in, hole needs to be soft and moist. That's all we need by the way dick is the best way to enjoy. You have a find a partner that knows how to use it.

  • huh i actually have been gotten off from a blowjob lol.. so this would be a deal breaker for me. Now dont get me wrong i love to give oral and use my hands but there is just nothing like givin the D to make me smile lol..

    • Could you get off from a mostly handjob and then finishing in her mouth?

  • So you complain about wanting to just stick to foreplay because sex doesn't get you an orgasm... but what about the guy who needs sex to get an orgasm? XD

    What a hypocrite lol

    • Not at all, he'd get Bjs like I mentioned. Or even handjobs if he wanted them.

    • And you think a blowjob can be compared to sex? Not even close.

    • I've heard guys say sometimes blowjobs are better.

    • Show All

  • I have no problem having an orgasm during intercourse. I have multiple ones.

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