I have been here on GAG now for several months and have commented on numerous posts from others. I have read through even more than I have had time to comment on. The pattern I see emerging is a troubling one at best when it comes to the sexual topic. First of all, it may seem like I'm trying to beat up on my own gender here but its not the case because I also see plenty of women contribute to the problem I'm about to address by their making excuses for the behavior of the guys in their life, or their being completely sold in allowing disrespect of their-self in order to be accepted into the social norm.
I'm on a passionate tirade today because I have come across a post from a guy in his early 20's yet again who has addressed a woman's vulva as "hanging meat curtains." I also frequently read other posts where a girl is asking an honest question because she needs some reassurance that her body looks good, only to have some guy come on and tell her that she is not good enough by making statements toward her such as "no guy will go down on her or have sex unless she fixes her body." Is this really what we have come to as a society??? Is there any wonder why someone can go shoot up a school, abandon their child, or treat their significant other as an object, devoid of any feelings of sympathy or empathy, when our society has become so systematically dehumanized? I'm sure many will come up with many excuses as to why they feel they need to act this way but those excuses do not hold water! I may even be accused of "judging" for pointing out how judgmental this type of mentality is, but so be it.
The fact of the matter is that women, as imperfect of creatures as they may be, are still the greatest gift of mercy on the face of this earth to us men. For every imperfection they have, we men have about 100 more. With all the imperfections of a woman, there is a perfection and fairness to her that is out of this world divine and beautiful. She is someone who can nurture a child naturally. She has within her body the ability to facilitate the creation of life. She has the ability to be compassionate and loving. She is willing. She puts up with a brunt of some of the unfair things we put off on her, including our tireless sexual demands as learned through pornography.
A woman now days is the recipient of an increasingly overwhelming amount of pressure to perform and look a certain body style, which can never be satisfied because she can never win vs. what she is up against by the likes of modern pop fashion trends and pornography. This fictitious standard has been set so incredibly high that she is consumed with the thought in many cases that she must somehow be "perfect" every time she turns around. Exactly what is "perfect" and who sets this fictitious concept??? Throw that all in the mix with constant labeling her vulva and such with derogatory terms as a "hairy roast beaf sandwich" or calling her breasts "tits" and likening her to the udder of a cow, and then is it any wonder why she pays thousands in monthly body modifications, enhancements, unnecessary surgeries, and products? Is there any wonder as to why the fashion industry preys on this constant fear of rejection and shaming???
We are really lucky as men that women want to have anything to do with us whatsoever after all they are put through in this area. Yes, men are very driven by sight and vision which has good reason naturally. If something didn't drive us as attractive, it would be more difficult to get us to want to make a baby and continue our seed and way of life. Whether its known or not, young men at puberty come with a natural preset of mental wiring which drive him as to how the female body should appear naturally in order to attract him as a mate. When the thousands of daily images through pornography however is allowed to poison these mental presets and replace reality, everything within him changes. It is playing with fire. We as men have a responsibility to not toy with our natural passions beyond their limits and to keep it in check.
Just like the male body develops at puberty with pubic hair to signal a female that his body and glands are ready to ejaculate and produce seed, the female body also signals this same sign back to let him know that her body is ready to be penetrated and that she can now facilitate the creation of life. Pornography prevents this beautiful union and tells both that unnatural acts and looks are preferred. A man should want the woman in his life to appear as physically mature and as if she has attained womanhood. He should not have a fictitious benchmark as to how her labia should appear, whether inward or outward. He should find her beautiful no matter the color of her labia. Her pubic hair and female shaped hips should appear beautiful to him because she is a mature woman and its the correct mental image as designed by nature or nature's God, which ever way one chooses to believe.
At the end of the day, sex is meant to be the most loving and beautiful act between a man and woman possible. It is first and foremost an expression of love. It can be relaxing and intense as well as fun at times. It can also be stress relieving, so why then allow ourselves to be stressed out by something that should be so enjoyable and healing, by turning it into a body shaming session with degrading terminology, or making it into a violent, mechanical, painful, and degrading act? We can and should do better at this or our generation and the generation to come will be highly dysfunctional and unhappy, despite these wonderful gifts we have been given. I believe strongly that we as men will be held accountable if we do not treat all the women in our lives with the upmost respect and love as well as cherish and protect them as they deserve nothing less.