The Aziz Ansari controversy seems particularly explosive in that it isn't as cut and dry as many of the other high profile sexual assault instances. In the context of this website, I think it is a particularly interesting situation to dissect, because it is an issue that's been talked about many, many times by women on here.
I think the issue really comes down to this--why aren't men more "respectful" of women these days? And, is there a legitimate way to destabilize the power balance so that it's not so one sided in favor of being a man? But it's not about power it's just common sense, you say. Well, I'd disagree. Aziz never forced to have sex, technically, based on her account in which she never verbally protested to what he was doing to the point where he kept going anyway. Yes, he'd "try again" minutes later, but he never simply ignored her and took advantage of her body while she protested and fought him. This is a very grey area that I know a lot of men struggle with both young and old. They think of hooking up like a game and in a game you have to progress levels, use strategies, and ultimately "win" through persistence and skill. Compassion doesn't occur to them until it's too late and yet I would argue that most of these men would feel awful if they could in fact realize it from the woman's perspective.
But to the point of this being about power. Let's play devils advocate and say that basically he did nothing wrong and women are just pissed with the fact that so many guys are only interested in them for sex. That, in a sense, Aziz rejected this woman the minute he made her meet him at his place instead of picking her up at hers like a gentleman. The meetup location, the rushed dinner, the first kiss to oral sex switchup, the obnoxious pointing to his dick until she sucked it, it all was really just one message over and over again: that she was not worthy of being anything but a hookup to him. And, that hurt her understandably. And, that hurts a lot of women understandably.
Her account of what happened with Aziz is not revenge porn, but I don't think it's target is to dismantle sexual assault as much as it is to destabilize men's power on dating. It's to stop guys not from being rapists (rape really isn't at the core of the issue in this case) but from basically being jerks. It's about telling men that it hurts to be rejected in this way. And, in this way, it's a very helpful account because it's bringing attention to us all that pressuring a girl who likes you and wants to be treated like a potential girlfriend like a girl you just want to have sex with is a form of rejection thats more emotionally harmful than physically harmful.
Aziz may lose his career not for being a rapist but for being a "typical guy" as she herself noted in her account. He's being embarrassed and networks may not want to take the chance betting that knowing this about Aziz is going to make you not want to watch him so they may just pull the plug on his work to be safe. And, in a sense, we men should feel embarrassed for acting this way. He should have been upfront.
He should have made it clear that his intention was just to hook up with her. There seems to have been nothing in their prior conversations to make it actually clear that she wanted to hookup, instead he knew she liked him and that he stood a reasonable chance of taking advantage of that fact to get what he wanted from her.
Bringing it back to the topic of us men, we need to look hard at this outdated system of "if i wine and dine her and be nice to her I can try to have sex with her." Yes, if she is making it clear she wants to have sex because you have such an instant connection then yes by all means but taking a girl for dinner doesn't mean you get to try to have sex with her and pressure her (even softly) if she's wanting to take things slower and get to know you. Trust me I get it--a lot of times the girl just isn't hot enough to warrant being your girlfriend in your opinion and you don't want to take things slow and let her get to know you, you'd rather just ditch her. But, clearly what women are saying to us with this account is that it's better to ditch them early on in the date than to try to later at the end of the date pressure them for sex they clearly don't want yet...
Oh, and as an aside that has nothing to do with the above, him performing oral on her after the first kiss is just bad sex no matter what kind of relationship it is.