A Traditional View on Waiting for Marriage With a Twist

I know this view of mine is weird. So I am a virgin by choice not by religion. I define virginity as never had vaginal sex.

I have that view to save myself for marriage, in my opinion I think is very romantic for him to carry me to bed on our wedding night knowing that he is the first and hopefully the only one that get to be in my pussy. He is the guy that transform me from a girl to a women, his women. And that is how I distinguish between boyfriend and husband.

Traditional view on waiting for marriage with a twist

Now you might start to say what if we are not sexually compatible and there's lots of people out there that say "you can't not test drive a car before buying" and I totally agree with you. I want someone that meet all my sexual need too. That is where the twist is.

I am not as innocent as most might assume, I am very open to sexual idea. When I am in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, I would love to have oral sex (I could use better words but just trying to keep it a bit formal here ;) ) with them all the time because I actually enjoy it. I would have anal sex with them, that is how I would know we are sexually compatible or not. I am not against toy plays as long as nothing in my pussy before marriage. That is why my box of toys (yes i do have a box of toys) is just anal toys, clit stimulators, nipple clamps and gag balls. Ps that is exactly the box I have ;)

A Traditional View on Waiting for Marriage With a Twist

I guess my point is I am very open sexually, I have many sexual fantasies and there's not much out there I would not try (only scat play I won't go there). But I only want to do it with my future husband.

I also don't have that view that my future husband needs to be virgin (in fact I would much prefer him have some sexual experience so he knows what I can do to please him).

So what do you guys think of this view? It is weird? Are there anyone out there with similar views?


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  • I don't think this is weird, but it's unusual. I really like it though, you've genuinely thought about what you want from relationships and sex, and you've come to a decision that seems to work for you.

    The box of toys is a bonus :)

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What Guys Said 22

  • You don't get to have oral sex and anal sex and then say you've waited til marriage. You are just lying to yourself. You can save your vagina if you want but you've had sex. You were sexual and had orgasms with someone else. You didn't wait for your wedding.

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    • yeah she might even believe she is doing hubby a favor for keeping herself "so pure". wanna talk virgins? my grandma married a virgin and she hasn't even looked herself at the mirror till that age, not to mention contemplate sex, lust on others, masturbate etc.

  • "Traditional View on Waiting... with a twist" (LOL, I like this expression)

    Since many had commented, and you're still a virgin, I shall share points that may surprise you.

    Before I proceed, I like to tell you that I saved my virginity and so did my wife. (So we were two "clueless" virgins on our wedding day.)

    While you had expressed beautifully the romance of giving your virginity to your husband, first time sex comes with a lot of uncertainty.

    Hence if you're fortunate, you feel no pain, little or no blood, have an earthshaking orgasm, your husband kisses and cuddles you after sex and you sleep in his bosom until morning.

    Perhaps.

    But there are also Brides who felt enough pain to hate sex for a long time; of many feel "Is that all?"; or cannot orgasm at all for whatever reason; of he gone soft and cannot penetrate at the last moment; etc.

    Well, I just stated two extremes that some women got for their First Time.

    So my opinion to you is: It is VERY NOBLE of you to want to save your virginity for your husband. (This is what my wife and I did for each other.) But do not draw too beautiful pictures of rainbows and unicorns and angels bursting into songs. No. It won't ever happen. So be prepared for the worst, yet endeavor to achieve your dreams. Don't be disappointed if your dreams do not get fulfilled. Marriage is about love, not sex.

    PS: Although my wife and I had one the worst sex during our "Consummation", we nevertheless had sex 7 times on our wedding day itself and probably 3 times a day for 6 months. This is how we enjoyed sex and treasured our innocence.

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  • You make no sense. Being a virgin means not having had sex.
    Anal sex is sex. It's right there in the name. It's not anal cooking, nor anal boating, and it's not anal car repair. See that word "sex" after the word "anal?" There's a reason it's there.

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  • I think I understand now how a virgin birth can happen!
    Female is doin' it doggy style with her butt in air, he pulls out of butt, (because remember Asker says she is still a virgin) and his full load runs downward into her vag and sperm gets up there and fertilizes egg.
    I await the newspaper headlines of her virgin birth!

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  • It's weird because you want another woman to be willing to do something that you are unwilling to do: have sex with your future husband outside marriage.

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    • That's why the double standard doesn't make sense to me. It takes two to tango.

  • You are not a virgin.
    Anal sex Counts.
    Oral Counts.
    Jacking Each Other Off Counts too.

    You can't have your cake and eat it too. You either wait totally, or not at all. I think you should wait all the way though, not just give in. I am waiting for marriage myself and thought about the whole, "you gotta test drive your car crap".

    Whoever my wife will be, she surely isn't a car, and the thing is, we can learn and communicate and change to each other. We aren't disposed in a certain way. Also, when a car breaks down, you go get a new one. The car analogy is ridiculous. You wouldn't get a new partner because the other one isn't satisfying you.

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    • that

    • Show All
    • If a small child did it then yes, it's not necessarily a murder such as if they pick it up and think it's a toy. That's a bad example. There is something called the age of accountability.

    • I agree with you.
      And the car analogy is so strange. I've never understood it.

  • Yeah you aren't a virgin.
    This takes absolutely ridiculous

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  • If you have done anal or oral, even if you haven't had your genitals penetrated, you are not a virgin.

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  • Ok, I can see many women fooling up their self and the guys they are dating taking advantage of that particular ignorance.

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  • Unbelievable that gag promotes such articles.

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  • Sorry, but oral and anal is still sex.

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  • Penis penetration IS sex, oral, anal or vaginal.

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  • The good ol' poop hole loop hole.

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  • Omg.

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  • I think that sounds great.

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  • Cool

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  • I don’t consider you a virgin.

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  • I consider anal even further than vaginal when it comes to doing the dirty. I'd argue you're less pure than a girl who's had vaginal sex and a baby if she's never been done in the bum.

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  • You’ve basically lost it already

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  • What is the point of keeping him out of your pussy if he has fucked your ass and your mouth? Do you think that you have retained any shred of innocence?

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What Girls Said 16

  • Ok so this was one of my first MHO answers.

    Is anal sex worth it as an alternative to keep virginity? ↗

    "To ME, that seem ridiculous, to each their own but there's just something weird about that to me.
    "Baby, Im saving myself for when I get married but you can fuck me in the ass if you want?"
    Or better yet when she tells her future husband
    "yes Im a virgin I saved myself for our wedding day or at least my pussy is. I've had more cocks in my ass than your favorite porn star."
    I mean honestly, why would you take it up the ass but not let a guy fuck your pussy? Any romantic or virtuous idea is gone with that, in my opinion."

    I think you should do what you want but in my opinion this is kind of dumb. That's just me though.
    I think you're going to have a hard time finding a guy that's going to see your vaginal virginity as all that special when youve had no problem having oral and anal sex with whoever.
    I think I get your thinking here but I just don't think to many guys are going to really see a difference.

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  • A bit delusional, but have at it.

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  • Isn't this a meme somewhere...
    "Baby you're hot let's fuck"

    "no I'm saving myself for marriage"

    "oh that's ok I'll just dump a load in your poop shoot then you can clean me up with your mouth."

    "Oh that seems reasonable"

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  • No oral sex, no anal sex no vaginal sex before marriage. And No I'm not kinky. And No I'm not ashamed of being considered as vanilla. In fact, I'm grossed out by kinks. Someone with my looks could not be into any type of sick kinks.
    I don't give a CRAP about sexual compatibility. If we're incompatible we should work on it.

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  • I’m a virgin at 25. There was no particular reason for this apart from not wanting it to be a little fumble being a teen then moving on. I think it would be romantic to save it for the man I’d marry, not necessarily for our marriage, just a man I see a future with.

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  • I really don't think the guy that will marry you will see you as a virgin. I mean you still have sex, doesn't matter that it isn't vaginal, but anal or oral. I understand why you wanna "save" your vagina for later, but to me it's not right to call yourself a virgin. Only your pussy is virgin, but you're not.

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  • Uhm... The only difference between us is that I'm not open to any kind of sexual activity before marriage.
    Sounds bad?
    Well, it is watching it is. As you said, "I'm a Virgin by choice"

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  • Please do NOT get married with this messed up mentality. Oral and anal sex is still SEX sweetheart. You are not a virgin. God knows it. You know it. Stop fooling around with God. A guy who foolishly marries you with that mentality is asking for trouble and heartbreak. You're open sexually? You have sexual fantasies deliberately? This is not weird. This is you needing HELP from the Lord. And let me not start with the sex toys. This is crazy. Don't know what religion you are referring to or come from. You might as well do it all now with your mentality. Don't expect to get a good husband and expect him to see you as a virgin or a girl who is going to be faithful to him. Because you couldn't be faithful to yourself.

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  • Troll or no? I honestly can't tell, but if not then this is too funny.

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  • the loophole is hardly original, snowflake. every church slut in existence already did that, and no one's buying that it's special when you took it up the pooper 800 times.

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  • Have you seen "clerks"? If not watch it.

    The idea of maintaining virginity, in my mind, is about having a man respect you for your virginity. I have no opinion of this. I did not wait myself.

    A man who has had penetration inside your anus a) has had a more intense experience then he would vaginally because its tighter and thus is not a virgin. I wonder why virginity would be important to you only for fenales and not for males. And b) no man will respect you MORE for withholding vaginal sex, opposed to anal or oral sex.

    If your entire concern is the hymen, please know many young women break there's during spirts participation. Get hymen replacement if an intact hymen is your only criteria.

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  • Yes thats weird! I agree with oral sex. But doing anal instead is stupid and its unhygienic. Do you have any idea how many bacterias and viruses lives in your colon/rectum and yes you can wash it mabe but i doubt that youl clear everything. And thennnn next time this bacterias sitting on his penis cause its not something that just goes away. Then you stick it into your mouth... dont be surprised if you get weird shit in your mouth or throat or even all over your face.. and do you really think the man of your dreams didn't stick his penis into someone else?

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  • I understand your idea, at the end of the day it’s all about context

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  • Good for you.

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  • Yeah it's weird.

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  • Good for you. I would most certainly not call you a virgin though...

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