Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
I have seen this question a couple of times so I thought I would take a stab at it. This is from my own experiences, and a little help of some friends.
The question I'm attempting to answer is:
How does sex feel for the opposite sex? How can we raise the sexual bar for our partner?
Understanding the Set Up.
For this I interviewed several women, and men I know, along with any of their friends willing to answer the question. I didn’t want to know how it felt for an average ho-hum encounter. I’m also staying away from the “let’s do this because I just need to get laid” encounter. I was after the holy grail of descriptions that can help men and women be the best to their partner. Every woman and man is different so, laying out steps don't work. Following some type of step system of doing A, then B, makes women, generally, feel secondary during sex. Like the guy is making some kind of half hearted effort to give her a clitoral orgasm so he can get down to business.
So, I took all the points given and went over each one and came to a consensus between the groups. It's literally impossible to understand a physical feeling you cannot or never have experienced. So, I'm keeping away from that as well. However, if the opposite sex can understand certain aspects from beginning to end, then total bliss could possibly be achieved. How is it that we can raise our lover’s expectation bar when it comes to sex? This is MyTake on how it may be possible.
So with that, let’s start with the women.
Nearly every single woman agreed that sex felt more intense when the man takes the lead. When he didn’t, or was afraid to it created an awkwardness. One woman said that it is almost an art to leading in a way that allows women to follow.
Most of the women describe the feeling as a sort of hunger. Others describe that hunger as a type of emptiness that flutters just below their rib cage that can only be satisfied one way. Every kiss can be felt in the bottom of her stomach. A tingling in her thighs can be felt.
If a woman feels safe with a man, she feels as though she can surrender more to him. She feels more confident in herself and her body. When she doesn’t have self-consciousness and lets go of her insecurities the moment becomes purer. Nothing feels rushed, but she is excited to rush into the whole thing with no destination. She feels as though she can melt into nothingness without fear or anxiety. Time and space stop in moment of pure ecstasy.
Whether everything happens quickly or it’s more of a slow love making session nearly every woman agreed that nothing felt rehearsed or forced. The person they were with doesn’t feel awkward, unsure of themselves, or nervous. Everything that happens in that moment, belongs in that moment. It’s just the two of them, and they are there for each other. When the man can lead and she is able to follow it feels like an energy between them can be pushed and pulled.
With feeling of safety, this energy flow back and forth, and the man makes eye contact with her, she knows they are in the same place. Her entire being becomes alive. She gets an awareness of her entire body in it’s truest sexual form.
Becoming a little rough can be the thing that sends a woman over the edge. Holding her face while kissing her while grabbing a fist full of hair. Biting her neck just hard enough that she knows you in tune with her. It’s here the man just takes her. She becomes absolutely consumed. The two become the moment, and the moment becomes the two. There is no division felt by her as the feeling is felt by every cell of her body.
When everything comes into alignment where the man can lead and be emotionally available, he is present in the moment, and his passion aligns with hers; she can achieve the holy grail of mind blowing orgasms. I’ll give some tips below.
Now from men's side of the coin.
To start, it’s probably important to point out that men can become initially aroused very easily. For most men, it doesn’t cause anxiety. As the arousal grows the man gets a driving urge to put the erection somewhere. Much like women gets the thoughts that she needs to be filled by something. Arousal can start from his woman saying she desires him, or as simple as his viewing the curvature of her hips while she ties her shoes.
On that note, men tended to have a hard time coming up with the words to accurately depict what it feels like. Another thing to note is that there were many diverse views from a desire to be able to look into her eyes, and enjoying positions where she was facing away from him. So, here we go with the beginning to end.
When initially aroused most of the guys state they develop a better sense of their woman when there is a lot of eye contact. They tend to become more in tune with her and her desires when there are lots of hands, and kissing. He feels she truly wants him, and it becomes the most erotic encounter with a sense he is able to truly know her. He can begin to emotionally connect to her at a deeper level.
Knowing he has totally willing partner can simultaneously God-like and humbling. Humbling because she is willing to allow him to discover her emotionally and physically. She is willing to accept him truly within her. It can seem God-like because she is willing to accept his sexual energy and open herself up.
As she begins to accept his energy and the connection becomes stronger all his stressors, and grievances begin to fall away. Everything in his life except the woman in front of him leaves his mind. He becomes present in the moment. He becomes filled with gratitude, longing, and desire to be enveloped in her soft, warm, loving embrace. He doesn’t want to be anywhere else except in that first moment of penetration.
He feels different levels of contentment. Contentment of desire, acceptance, emotion, and physical. He doesn’t care what her make up looks like. He doesn’t care about the little extra motion of her cellulite. Bringing attention to it by switching positions just brings him out of the moment by breaking the connection.
He wants to be totally immersed in her. Where hours feel like seconds. The encounter is consumed with a totally flowing state that is explorative and feels as if he has arrived in a comfortable and familiar space that nourishes his soul.
His orgasm is short and intense. Where some women can experience an average clitoral orgasm lasting can average 20 seconds to 2 minutes. His orgasm will last on average about 9 seconds. While he does desire that intense relief, he also desires to satisfy her, and leave her completely spent in a euphoric state.
While there is, some similarity between women’s and men’s versions there is actually more involved with the men. The men describe passion, familiarity, connectedness, intensity, a sense of simultaneously giving and receiving, emotional nourishment, and worthiness.
That’s not saying that women do not desire all the same things. I’m sure many women would say those feelings would apply to them. I just did not get those descriptions from many women.
As Promised. A Way To Her Ultimate Orgasm.
This is known as cervical orgasm. I know some women are saying “You need your head examined! Hitting my cervix hurts!” Hear me out first. Most women like enjoy the deep penetration when their legs are pulled to their chest. What this actually does is slightly shorten the vagina allowing the penis to get close to the cervical wall. Instead of long thrusts use deeper short thrusts. Long thrusts keep the penis in shallow areas of the vagina. Take more time with deep shallow thrusts to massage (not pound) the cervical area. A deeper mild orgasm can be experienced. Or an intense deep very consistent orgasm that can last a very long time can be had.
This is actually based on research done by Dr. Barry Komisaruk of Rutgers University, and his mapping of the female brain responses to stimulation via vagina, clitoris, or cervix in a fMRI.
Link for more info if interested - Dr. Barry Komisaruk
Hope this helps answer some questions. If I missed anything or I'm just so far off I need my head examined let me know.
Just know that I'm assuming that some type of attraction or love is involved. So, please don't bash because I left it out.
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