I have been on tinder for a couple years and I've discovered quite some things. I'm not obese, but well, I'm kinda chubby. And being a chubby girl on tinder, really makes dating very different than when you are skinny. I used to be skinny when I first got on tinder. After a few months I gained a lot of weight and kinda stayed that way. Didn't get much less matches. But the way guys see you and why they date you changes A LOT. Small detail, and I don't want to brag: I know I'm not ugly. Still do some modeling for plus size clothing. Just not thin anymore. So for people who are not sure about how they look, this take is mainly for women who have questions about their weight. Not looks in general.
Is it worse when you are on the heavier side? Well for most of us, yes. Though I still had a lot of fun and met some great guys. But do guys contact you for the same reason? Nope.
In short: If you're cute and have a fit body, guys want to date you, not just for sex, but often with further goals. They might want to keep seeing you, start a relationship and show you as their girlfriend to their friends and family. If you are chubbier, well... get used to getting on your knees and putting that mouth to work on the first date!
Tinder for thin girls: easy mode
When I was thin, guys were really careful with how they chatted with me. They chose carefully what kind of date it was, where we'd meet, how they dressed up for the date, and of course how they carefully checked when and how they would get in my pants. Their purpose was often also sex, but they had so much more respect for me. I noticed that they would love to see me more often and even show me off as their proud catch to their friends.
Tinder for big girls: hard mode
Since I got chubby, things changed completely. Still met up with the same type of guys. Still always guys i thought were hot. But Their intentions were completely different. The way they talked to me, the fact that they chatted the same day/night they so necessarily wanted to meet up, and where they wanted to meet up. Just one reason: getting their balls emptied.
Now I'm not really looking for serious relationships. I mainly want to date, get to know guys and see where it goes. Honestly I prefer to just have some great connection with a guy than a serious relationship. But I can't count the times I blew guys on the first date and quite often only date. And I also noticed that it's mainly the blowjob that's popular. Sex too, but that's more for a second date. I really don't mind giving guys blowjobs on the first date though. I feel comfortable with casual sex and really like giving blowjobs. But I do get that most women don't think that way and might feel slutty or used. In the beginning when I gained weight, I often turned them down when they asked for a favor, and the dates ended really quickly every time. And when I did do it, well at least it was fun and some of them asked for a second date. That second date was often also with sex as the goal, but by the third or fourth date I usually got a connection with some pretty cool guys.
When they text you, you notice immediately they don't even try to hide the fact they just want to get off as fast as possible cause they feel horny. They also try to come to my place immediately, and honestly I even offer to just cook for them at my place, or "watch a movie" cause I know that's what they want. If I went out, I ended up on my knees in a toilet stall, his car or even behind a dumpster... Romantic, right?
All these things aren't just my experiences, I talked to a lot of women with the same body type as me, and so many of them experience the same thing. Not all of them of course, but it still seems to be very common. I even talked to a couple guys that were really good looking and were open enough to talk about why they, who can date any girl, wanted to come to my place so suddenly, not being too much of a gentleman, and got their loads of baby juice all over my face in no time. They admitted that they also lost count of how often this scenario happened and that it's "just the way it goes. Why not?"
Again, I'm not saying dating has become horrible for me since I got curvy. I'm still having an awesome time. It just got a lot harder to get that plain nice, cosy date. It's like dropping in ranking and having to work a little first to get something.
What do you think about my take? Is it fair, or should these guys' attitude towards us change? Please share your opinion!