Judaism’s views sex to be a natural and holy thing, provided that it is done in a “kosher” way, so to speak.
Traditionally , sex in Judaism is considered kosher when it is between a husband and a wife. The first commandment is the Torah (Jewish Bible) is to “be fruitful and multiply”, which is the main reason as to why sex is consider to be a holy thing in Judaism- It’s two people who come together to create a new life.
This myTake with explore common questions in regards to traditional Jewish views on sex and sexual orientation.
How does Judaism View Premarital Sex?
Traditionally, premarital sex is discouraged, and in some cases taboo, in Judaism. In the orthodox world, premarital sex is strictly forbidden. In fact, many ultra-orthodox communities separate men and women in synagogues and schools in order to decrease the likelihood of romantic encounters. However, there are many liberal Jewish communities that do not separate the men and women.
What does Judaism say about Masturbation?
Traditionally, masturbation is strictly prohibited for men. This is because Judaism views masturbation as “spilling of the seed”, which means wasting the sperm. Wasting the sperm means wasting a potential life, which in some cases can be viewed as murder.
However, Judaism acknowledges that the ability to resist the urge to pleasure yourself is borderline impossible, especially for men. Almost ALL jewish men, no matter how religious they are, will most likely do it at one point or another. This is a major reason as to why Judaism tried to make marriage as early as possible, in order for the man to stop sinning and put his “seed” to use.
Women, on the other hand, are allowed to masturbate, because they don’t have to worry about wasting a potential life. However, there are many people in religious communities who try to discourage women from masturbating as well.
If “spilling of the seed” is prohibited, what does this mean for oral sex?
Judaism views of a man receiving oral sex is prohibited, because of the issue of spilled semen. In contrast, a women receiving oral sex does not raise the issue of spilled semen. However, a man staring at his wife’s genitals when performing the act is prohibited.
There may also be other “loopholes” to Judaism’s view on oral sex as well. Some Jewish communities say a man can do whatever he wants with his wife, as long as it’s consensual.
How does Judaism’s View same-sex relations?
Again, the whole issue comes down to spilling the speed. Sexual relations between two men are forbidden because of this reason. The Torah also explicitly states that “man shall not lie with another man”, which reinforces Judaism’s reasoning on why homosexual relations between two men is prohibited.
Sexual relations between two women, however, are not entirely explicit in the Torah nor does it raise the issue of spilling the seed. However, because most of Judaism views marriage strictly between a man and woman, having lesbian relations can also be frowned upon as well.
In addition, Judaism also believes that people exist to overcome a certain challenge they have in life. A person may identify as being homosexual but has the challenge to not act on those feelings.
What are Judaism’s Overall Views of Sex?
Despite the holiness of sex, Judaism also views sexual drive as being a component of the yetzher hora (the evil inclination). Ironically, though, the evil inclination is not really that bad. It can be used for reproducing and holiness. A certain portion in the Torah also says “Were it not for the yetzer hara, no man would build a house, marry a wife, or beget children.”
In conclusion, sex in Judaism is seen as a beautiful and holy thing. Although pleasure during sex is important, Judaism views the sole purpose of sex is to reproduce and create a new life.
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