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How my girlfriend helped me improve our sex life

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How my girlfriend helped me improve our sex life

My girlfriend and I have been together for 5yrs. We life together and we are generally a very happy couple.

However, our sex life was horrible and its only recently that I've realised how horrible it was. There was no passion or intimacy. In my mind it was all about "getting the job done". By that I mean having my orgasm to relieve myself for another day or two. She certainly got very little enjoyment out of it which bothered me for a long while. But i never said anything for a long time. However, one night after a few wines I asked the question " do you enjoy having sex with me" and her reply was not what I wanted to hear. She said "you are actually not very good in bed".

We had a long discussion about it and it basically came down to a few things:

Too much focus on rushing to orgasm, finishing too quickly, losing interest in her after I cum and not enough intimate time like kissing, cuddling, back rubs etc.

We talked about ideas, our desires, what we wanted and considered "good sex" which led us to how do we find the spark and passion that we had 4yrs ago. We wanted to try something that was kinky, fun but that would help our relationship and improve her view on sex.

What we came up with was a chastity device. Its basically a device that locks around the penis and testicles. It can't be removed without a key and it prevents the penis from being touched or stimulated. Now dont get me wrong, i had no intention of wearing it all time. Its only to be worn during intimacy and even then is not going to be used all the time.

Essentially, it takes my penis out of the equation. It doesn't matter how horny i get during intimacy i can't get it off without the key which she puts in a draw. It means that I have to find other ways to express my arousal. Maybe we give eachother a massage, maybe its just lying in bed kissing and fondling. 2 weeks ago I went down on her for the first time in 3years.

It has basically given me the time and focus to learn how to make love to her and how to recieve attention as well as give it. For example, she might give me a full body massage which makes me horny as hell. But instead of trying to cum as soon as im horny I just put my head back, moan a little and enjoy the feeling of her hands on my body.

Its not that we have quit having normal sex, we still do. Its just that we both have to agree to remove the device. So if she's not ready for sex i stay locked up and we continue being intimate in some other way.

Overall this has helped a lot. Its a bit of kinky fun as its got a bit of a bdsm, powerplay feel to it. But beneath all that I've become a better lover and I've now got a girlfriend that actively makes moves for sex instead of just doing it to keep me happy. A

How my girlfriend helped me improve our sex life
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Most Helpful Girls

  • Anonymous
    Oh my... clearly this is what I am lacking 😂 seriously thanks for the tip because what you just described? Well I can 100% feel your girlfriend, it’s a four year kind of thing and gurl is getting BORED. I was gonna leave but maybe a dick lock is the better solution...
    Is this still revelant?
    • My advice would be find a gentle way to tell him your not sexually satisfied. It will make him open to fresh ideas and then you can bring it up.
      The first few times you shouldn't unlock him at all. He needs to learn that your whole sex life as a couple does not revolve around his dick. Get a good cage. If i tried to rip mine off it would flatten my testicles, it just doesn't come off.
      Communication is key, be open and clear about what you want. Dont play games with him or expect him to read your mind. If you want your pussy licked, say it outright. Also.
      Have fun, rememeber life is to short to be super serious. Enjoy your intimacy.

  • jordynicole
    It’s good to see that there are still people in this world today, that can teach and still love😊😊
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls Said (3)

  • Blair1994
    A lot of women could benefit from this.
  • SecretGardenBlood65
    Good take
  • braelynadelebaker
    How so
    • Lol what?

    • what do you like to do with her

    • Well we have normal sex but now also more kinky sex where she is in charge.
      For example sitting on my face, spanking etc. Teasing me and then not taking the cage off is also oneof her favourites.
      But really 90% of the time we are pretty vanilla. The chastity device just stays on until she feels ready for sex.

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