2 mo

PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT! : Tips for Surviving and Thriving during the COVID-19 Condom Shortage!!

laurieluvsit

OK, two things are combining to create a very real catastrophe here, and I am not exaggerating!

First, due to this current crisis and the requirement for everyone to "Shelter In Place" and stay home, there is a lot more than usual hanky panky going on under, and over, the sheets ...and for the more adventurous among us ...on the couch, on the kitchen table, on the floor in front of the fireplace, out on the patio, in or around the swimming pool, in the jacuzzi, and only heaven knows where else! ...and that means that a large volume of used condoms are going in the trash can ...or god forbid, down the drain, causing a dangerously low supply with the newly created skyrocketing demand!

Secondly ...all the factories have been shut down, and are now making face masks, ventilators, or whatever else, instead of condoms, since I guess they don't consider condoms a necessary product for survival.

Please don't take this entirely as a joke, here's the link about all of this, which is just adding more stress to this virus emergency! ...

WORLD CONDOM SHORTAGE!

OK, now that you know the seriousness of this issue, let's put our heads together to brain storm and figure out how to best deal with this potential disaster.

Sure there are birth control alternatives but none of them is as fool proof as a condom, as long as it doesn't break. And, in conjunction with minimizing the potential for pregnancy, it also provides a barrier of protection against certain diseases in many cases, which none of the other birth control methods can do.

So here's my ideas on the immediate course of action I think we need to take to stay safe from unwanted pregnancy, and even more disease, and make sure that GAG members do not face even more trauma by running out of much needed condoms!

THE ULTIMATE SOLUTION

If money is not an issue for you, start hording big time. Get a tractor trailer big rig to deliver a truck load to your mansion steps!

No, thats not my color but my mom likes it ...lol
No, that's not my color but my mom likes it ...lol

Don't delay, forklift the pallets of condoms into one of your garages. You can keep the extra Maserati, Rolls Royce or Lamborghini outside in the rain, it won't hurt it for awhile until your supply of condoms dwindles to a level where you can squeeze it back in surrounded by the remaining cases ...you just can't take the chance of ruining the condoms by leaving them out in the elements, so be prepared to sacrifice a little, or better yet, just have a warehouse built on your property to store them in, as construction is allowed during this crisis!

Just be sure not to be caught short here!

YAY! ...IM SET WITH CONDOMS FOR A FEW MORE MONTHS NOW GUYS!!
YAY! ...I'M SET WITH CONDOMS FOR A FEW MORE MONTHS NOW GUYS!!

A MORE ECONOMICAL WAY TO GO

OK, so not all of us have the means of the super wealthy to deal with this problem, but may still be among the higher income earners. In that case, just bring in a smaller truck load and store them in your attic, a corner of your garage or in a guest bedroom.

Yes Sir, into the Barn they go!
Yes Sir, into the Barn they go!

NEXT BEST

So, if you are just the average person trying to make a living from day to day, what can we do to still provide for a "must have" situation like this when facing this stark reality? Here again are my thoughts ...

Empty the suit case where you typically hide, or store, your sex toys and bring it to the nearest pharmacy. Ask the pharmacist to fill it with all the condoms they have on display and any that they may have stored away in the back room. Then just keep going from pharmacist to pharmacist until you gather up an ample supply with what you can afford!

CAUTION: Keep an eye in your rear view mirror to be sure you're not being followed, there's no telling what someone will do when they spot you high tailing it out of the store with all the remaining condoms. People act strange in desperate times like this!

OMG! ...I cant let my mother see these!
OMG! ...I can't let my mother see these!

And don't forget, buying a case of condoms still beats buying case after case of baby diapers, formula, baby food, baby clothes - which only last a couple of months at a time until the little curtain climber needs a new wardrobe all over again, etc etc etc ...you know the drill ...the list goes on and on, and at a time when you're least prepared for it.

I wish you would tell that to my younger sister!
I wish you would tell that to my younger sister!
PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT! : Tips for Surviving and Thriving during the COVID-19 Condom Shortage!!

WHAT EXACTLY SHOULD WE BUY

LET'S START WITH SIZE

OK, so if you are a guy, this is a no brainer, right? ...regardless of your fantasies, reality is reality and you know what to do.

However, if you are a single female and not yet with a steady partner, we are looking at an entirely different ball game here.

There is just no telling exactly what you will be running across (or landing on), so to speak ...lol, so let's get an assortment of sizes, right?

Lets see? ...do you find a guy to fit the color or vise versa? ...lol
Let's see? ...do you find a guy to fit the color or vise versa? ...lol
OMG! ...Theyre making them for horses now too! ...or, are these for some of the GAG members PMing us their D Pics ...lol
OMG! ...They're making them for horses now too! ...or, are these for some of the GAG members PM'ing us their D Pics ...lol

KEEPING A SENSE OF HUMOR IN AN OTHERWISE GRIM SITUATION

And let's not forget to stay a little light hearted about all this so we don't loose our mind along the way.

PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT! : Tips for Surviving and Thriving during the COVID-19 Condom Shortage!!
PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT! : Tips for Surviving and Thriving during the COVID-19 Condom Shortage!!
All I want is someone with a good heart and a dirty mind
All I want is someone with a good heart and a dirty mind
Courtesy of a registered Independent
Courtesy of a registered Independent
Girls play hard to get, Guys get hard to play ...lol
Girls play hard to get, Guys get hard to play ...lol
A man that knows how to use his tongue can be extremely useful :)
A man that knows how to use his tongue can be extremely useful :)
Of course I swallow - spitting is just rude!
Of course I swallow - spitting is just rude!

I hope you enjoyed my condom shortage myTake, and always remember...

PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT! : Tips for Surviving and Thriving during the COVID-19 Condom Shortage!!

...AND DON'T FORGET TO BUY YOUR CONDOMS BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!! ...l'M NOT KIDDING!

PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT! : Tips for Surviving and Thriving during the COVID-19 Condom Shortage!!
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  • TadCurious
    Laurie you really have a great sense of humor! Thank you. 😂🤣
    Is this still revelant?
    • Thank you for enjoying, you have made my night Mr TC :)

    • TadCurious

      You're a wonderful light in these difficult times. 🌞

    • TadCurious

      Thank you sweet and humorous Laurie for MHO! 😊🀣

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

737
  • MrOracle
    This is why Amazon is great - instead of having to buy 3-packs at the local drug store, you can buy 36-packs or even 144 packs online, for a fraction of the price. You can also get the ones you like, instead of having to choose from 2 or 3 crappy options. The only downside (which has never been an issue for me) is having to plan ahead. I always plan ahead.
    • Yes, but don't forget that Amazon could be out soon... STOCK UP NOW while you have the chance! ... lol

    • MrOracle

      I always have plenty on hand. As I said, I always plan ahead. I have over 100 right now, and I'm sure that will get me by.

  • humanearth
    You some boxes of them. Me and wife are done having kids. (12 in all, I was married twice)

    So everytime we buy a sextoy from this company. They send us a new box of condoms with the toy for free.

    Need a box or two. Just ask

    by the way.

    Love the cartoons you posted. They made me laugh
  • blutwolfe
    if my girl got pregnant, I'd be the happiest man alive honestly, I'd love to be a father, I sound retarded, but I'd love to give someone the life I never had
  • jemismyname
    You know, they make reusuable, silicone condoms, these days... Also, it's good because you can use natural oil lubricants (such as coconut oil) with silicone condoms, and they are hypoallergenic (unlike latex).

    I personally, can't stand latex condoms... they make my tallywhacker turn purple. :(

    and i am loathe to have to pay money to a corporation every time i want to have sex. fuck that. :D
  • matchrestore
    Amazon subscribe and save for the win... got my scheduled box of condoms delivered last week, plus we had about a month's worth already in the bedside table. If all else fails we have some that are a style I hate (they essentially grip my foreskin in the worst way), but if we run out and we can't find any more, they're better than not having sex.
  • lovephotography
    I prefer the feeling of no condom. So I won't be taking any from you guys! Lol
  • DUHOHNO
    pornhub the reason for the shortage , free viewing of the website.
    • Yes, they have a great site. xvideos is a good one also.

      ... and there's a special secret one for us bi/lesbian girls as well :)

  • TCredo
    lol.. too funny and really well done! I saw the condom shortage news earlier and I am sure we'll see viral store vids like the TP madness... I will say even without the condom shortage there is a great chance of a huge spike in births in about 9-10 months... even more than when a city sees a spike 9-10 months after their local team wins the Super Bowl or other major championships. It's pretty much guaranteed when that happens so with lockdowns.. it's not a one night celebration but weeks-on-end sex fest lol.

    On the flipside... there is also likely to be a big spike in divorces post-lockdown lol... especially with couples who are used to being apart for regular spurts of time (like frequent business travelers) - which is how some couples work or have grown to work... I say this part in jest but I do think it might show itself in stats later on... especially when you think about the stress many folks are under emotionally and financially...
  • Robertcw
    Number 1. I'm beginning to realize you're super rich. I had no idea.

    Number 2. Shouldn't you be isolating? hmm? Ie no hanky panky unless you already live with this person? 🤣

    Number 3. I'm so bored. Somebody pls talk to mee.
  • MrTaboo
    That's why I make her swallow.

    And I did find a 275 gallons of lube for sale on amazon yesturday. Only$9700.
  • Aakash_Hangargi
    Some babies are gonna curse you 😂😍 what a take humorous Ms. Laurie...
    • Thank you, I as so glad that you enjoyed it! :)

  • brittany15
    i know there is a lot of hoarding foolishness happening but is there really a Condom Shortage happening lol
    • There is about to be.

      If you click on the link at the beginning of the myTake it tells you all about it :)

    • brittany15

      ill take a look

    • brittany15

      that is interesting aleast people will be useing there not just storing it in the basement thinking it's doomsday lol

  • simplelikeme
    I'm single so I don't have to worry about the condom issue LOL but even if I had a significant other, condoms would still not be an issue. The sooner people get with the program and work together about this epidemic well, the sooner we can all get back to our normal lives.
  • Elgabri
    Maybe this is a problem some places. But it seems condoms and lube in my area of the merikas everyone has forgot they exist. They are singularly the best stocked item. I have always found it funny they are across from the diapers but tampons are like 6 isles away often with the paper goods.
  • Twalli
    The form if birth control I use is a vascetomy and it is purported to be more effective than all other forms combined even a hysterectomy. A friend of my dad got pregnant after getting one.
  • JohnWickman
    Well hello there little miss laurieluvsit! Boy, I sure have missed you. I hope you are doing well but more importantly I hope you remember who I am. I used to be on here as much as you were but left due to too much childishness.
  • Jaximus-Lion
    Omg! Do you want idiots not to have idiot babies. Shame on you, HOW DARE YOU 🤣🤣🤣
  • jgirl99
    There's a condom shortage?🤣🤣 good thing we don't bother with them
  • Darkdragon79
    Like I said in another question. In 9 months from now a whole generation will be born.
  • MannMitAntworten
    Everyone’s tubes are tied around here and I am keeping my horse in the barn, so win win either way.
  • lightbulb27
    Educational and funny... and gross!

    girls leak from both sides... inspiring throught..
  • Tunasub
    Remember no glove no love.. butt if you've been snipped let er rip!!
  • Jamie05rhs
    Just have phone sex and video sex. Do the right thing. You can sacrifice just this once for your country and the world.
  • COMMODOREII
    😂This crazy and awesome at the same time. I love it!! 😂
  • johny0000
    Is. it!! People are still in sex mood.. ha ha.. stay calm..
  • Stonernights
    there's a shortage? I never use them 🤷🏼‍♀️
    • There isn't now, but they are expecting one at any time now due to factory shut downs and current over use.

  • iFarted
    There will be a lot of babies born in 9-10 months
    • I know, that's why I'm trying to get the word out to stock up! ... lol

    • kaylaS91

      The coronials 🀣

    • iFarted

      @kaylaS91 perfect name for that short generation πŸ˜‚

  • Bootylicious905
    Ever heard of birth control
    • Yes, I addressed that in the myTake. Read it when you have some time :)

  • Mezius
    I'm contributing by being too much of a loser to get laid!
  • Ratmuffin
    Are those pictures of condoms...
  • you got way too much time on your hands
  • WhereAmI
    I'll just wash them out and reuse them...😂😂😂
  • AlexDoesStuff
    Just don't fuck lol
  • Finchie40
    I will contribute , I won’t use them lol
  • wagsingle
    Damn hoarders!
  • AkshiJanjua
    do anal
  • Handysandy69
    Latex gloves😉🤙
  • chillpg
    Something I failed to consider
  • lakshmipathi
    Hloooo
  • msc545
    Funny!
  • 2lgt2quit
    Swallow do oral
  • Anonymous
    Haha I had a good laugh when reading your My Take 😂😂
    I'm allergic to latex condoms and so are shit out of luck coz I can't find the type of non-latex condoms I use anywhere!
    • Awe... :(

      ... but thank you for liking this myTake :)

    • Anonymous

      Ahhhh it's not the end of the world so there's always going bare as an option haha πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‚πŸ˜ˆ

  • Anonymous
    Anal and blow jobs. Problem solved.
  • Anonymous
    Damn you pervert 🤭
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