Yep, cumming at you with more sex jokes.. Drunk ones at that🤣
Q: Why did Mexicans create tequila?
A: So ugly people would have a chance at having sex!
Q: What's the difference between a G-Spot and a bottle of Jack Daniels?
A: A guy will actually SEARCH for a bottle of Jack Daniels.
Q: What is the similarity between Michelob Ultra and having sex in a rowboat?
A: They are both SO close to water
Q: Why do gynecologists only drink Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer and Smirnoff Vodka?
A: "Pabst Smir!"
A Shot of Whiskey
A man walks into a bar and orders a shot of whiskey then looks into his pocket. He does this over and over again. Finally, the bartender asks why he orders a shot of whiskey and afterwards look into his pocket. The man responded, "I have a picture of my wife in there and when she starts to look good then i'll go home."
Drunk Husband
A wife was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband's key in the door. "Stay where you are," she said. "He's so drunk he won't even notice you're in bed with me." Sure enough, the husband lurched into bed none the wiser, but a few minutes later, through a drunken haze, he saw six feet sticking out at the end of the bed. He turned to his wife: "Hey, there are six feet in this bed. There should only be four. What's going on?" "Nonsense," said the wife. "You're so drunk you miscounted. Get out of bed and try again. You can see better from over there." The husband climbed out of bed and counted. "One, two, three, four. You're right, you know."
Better Boyfriend
Two girls were comparing boyfriends. "Mine's the best," said the first. "I call him Seven-Up because he's 7 inches long and he's always up!" "Oh yeah," exclaimed the other, "I call my boyfriend Jack Daniel's because he's the best hard licker there is!"
Drunk Cowboy
One night a lone cowboy rode into a small town. He immediately went to the only saloon in town and ordered a drink. While drinking he asked the bartender if there was a room and any women around. The bartender told him he had a room for rent and then glanced over to his friends drinking at another table.They decided to play a joke on the cowboy. As the evening drug on, the cowboy became very drunk but was still asking about a woman. Finally the bartender sent his friends upstairs on a mission and they returned shortly. Then the bartender told the cowboy that they only had one woman there but she was upstairs waiting on him. (the bartender's friends had carried a blow-up doll upstairs and placed her in his bed) At this point the cowboy bid everyone good night and slowly climbed the stairs. Filled with anticipation he approached the room and went inside as the men downstairs listened with great interest. After a few moments, they heard the bed springs squeaking and moans of pleasure coming from the room The roared with laughter. Then everything was quiet. Not beinging able to sleep with anticipation of the coming morning, the men decided to play poker through the night and await the man coming down the next morning. As he came down the stairs, they noticed a strange look on his face. They asked: "Well, cowboy, how was the woman." He hestitated, then answered: "Man, that was the best piece of ass I ever had, but the strangest thing happened." After I screwed her i bit her on the titty and she farted and flew out the window and I haven't seen her since.
I hope you enjoyed this drunk quickie(that's what he said🤣🤣)
Thanks for reading❤️❤️
"Brainsbeforebeauty"😘
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