1 mo

You Don't Have to Say Yes to Sex With Every Woman

ManOnFire
You Dont Have to Say Yes to Sex With Every Woman

So this Take arrives after having a conversation with some of my buddies this afternoon, and thought I should share it. The message is not unheard of, and you actually can find quite a lot about it on YouTube if you really care to, but I feel like bringing in some more to the GaG male community. So I’ll just cut to the chase here.

One of the things guys don’t understand and what they really need to is that you do not always have to say yes just because it is available, it is being offered to you, or because she’s good-looking and is showing interest in you. You can and you do have the ability to say no when you want to.

On the one hand I do understand that it can be difficult for most men to realize this because our culture teaches men that they “don’t have as many options” as women and that men can’t get sex as regularly as women, so it causes them to feel like they need to take what they can when it comes along, especially if it’s free. Women also play an enormous part in this mental conditioning and manipulation even though they claim they don’t: first they will brag about how they can get laid easier than guys whenever they want - and some even gladly tell us their stories of how it happens - but then, they will get upset if guys are actually doing the same thing, or get upset that a guy is so focused on trying to do it, yet it’s okay if she does it. If you want to understand more of what I mean, you can read about it in my old Take How Women Create Sexual Frustration In Men . So when guys have all this toxic slime being fed to them with all these messages in our culture, it does make them feel like they should go for any opportunity at a fuck that presents itself. And you don’t have to.

The blood rush

I also understand that it can be very difficult when sex is offered to you as a man because all kinds of hormones and sensations go pulsing through your blood, your brain, and your pelvis when a female has actually consented to wanting to sleep with you, or is the one asking if you want to go back to her place. Literally! When that kind of thing is a big time green light for a guy, it can be very difficult and very crippling to want to turn that down. But guess what: you still can.

You Dont Have to Say Yes to Sex With Every Woman

And I do understand how difficult that can be for the guys who are virgins. When an open opportunity for sex has finally come along for them, they want to take it and be glad to say they’re not a virgin anymore. That kind of thought is always desirable, I get that. But it’s not always noble to say yes to it either. Especially if it follows with you getting a disease, getting fired, or getting met by her boyfriend or husband that she may or may not have told you about.

Women get turned on by guys who aren't trying

My point with this message is that although a fuck can be great with a girl who is into you and the opportunity is great - and believe me I’ve done it, it doesn’t always have to happen, and shouldn’t. Instant sex can get you into trouble, or give a woman leverage over you, and many often will use it that way and have done it for ages.

In truth, men should not be easily saying yes to offered sex. They should be attracting it. And how do you do that? By not being eager. Women are oddly (and sometimes foolishly) attracted to men pushing them away. They are actually more turned on by men who aren’t that quick to fuck them. It makes them start wondering, “Wowwww, so he must want something or someone else more. What does he want more??????????” You become mysterious!

You Dont Have to Say Yes to Sex With Every Woman

But it also really fucks with their psychology. Because women of today want all the power and control in being able to attract and choose a man. And they want this because they know that an enormous percentage of the modern male population - especially in their 20s - are beta simps who bow down and worship the prettiest things they see. They’re all the goofy pathetic dudes you see giving the same old goofy comments on Instagram to some girl’s picture - “You’re so beautiful (heart eyes)” blah blah blah.

Women of today know that men try hard to win them. They sit with them at lunch time trying to appeal to her. They cling to her by walking with her around the workplace or on campus, as if they’re terrified she’ll get another dude’s attention. And when they get her number they’re constantly texting her. Not realizing that all this actually makes the women bored. But also is how they end up having the control. So many women get used to this, and have become drunk off of it. And expect it. It means that any time they’re ready to have extra money or a quick fuck, there’s a guy there willing to give it.

You give women all the power

And this is why so many women of today walk around acting snobby and pretending that they don’t want guys to talk to them, when they are actually hoping you will so they can brush you off, which builds up their ego. They actually want you to keep trying, and they want to be able to brag to their girlfriends and everyone else about all the guys they’re not interested in but who are interested in them.

Having said all this, you need to be the guy who doesn’t regard them and doesn’t want to fuck them, even if they are game. But watch out: some will want you for it, but you shouldn’t want any woman back who is like that at all. They’re simpletons. Don’t let them have control. Others will actually hate you for not glorifying them. I know this is the case for me, and I love that they hate me for not bowing down. In truth, women hate it when you as a man can actually see that you will not give them attention and glorify them on a pedestal like other simps do, because you're not giving in to their expectations, and because you can see their bullshit. If a man can read women very well and has learned from his experiences, that frightens them, because it means there's no trick from them that you can't figure out. You're smart. You're intelligent. And you're also strong enough not to be bent by manipulative behaviors.

You Dont Have to Say Yes to Sex With Every Woman

Most guys don’t realize it, but women who really do go out and get laid easy actually see those guys as bitches. It wasn’t too hard to nail him and get the one and done. So they see you as weak, and move on to the next. This is how you have a lot of women who hook up and then ghost guys when the guys start catching feelings, not seeing how as women they're just as worthless to live a life of getting sex like that.

Regardless, you can still do better by not being one of those guys. Do things the traditional way: meet women, form concrete connections, then friendships, and if it’s really going well then you can spear her through the hips. Otherwise, it actually is not necessary to just jump at any opportunity to sleep with a woman simply because it’s available. And you don't have to let your friends teach you to do it either.

#dontjumpatsex

You Don't Have to Say Yes to Sex With Every Woman
15
54
Add Opinion
15Girl Opinion
54Guy Opinion

Most Helpful Guys

  • CallmeTheKnight
    It is good to be very picky with the women that come in your life. Whether it be limited to just sex or it can be into a relationship, we should not say yes or give every woman our time because it shows that we have no standards if we do.
    If getting sex from easy women is appealing, then you have to keep in mind that STDs are very real and it's easy for a lot of people to say that they're clean, but you can never take their word for it. I for one can say the idea of having sex with the wrong person or multiple people is not only scary, but very irresponsible.
    So men, it is completely fine to say no or refuse sex from multiple women. Saying yes to every woman it's easy and very unappealing. Take your time getting to know someone, because it's fun. Within a period of time getting to know each other, let how you feel for each other be the judge of whether you sleep with this person or not, instead of because you're horny or they look good.
    Like 6 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • ManOnFire

      Excellent answer.

    • shaysh87

      I don’t think most guys would refuse sex if it was offered by multiple women. You’re only speaking out of your own perspective , not men in general

    • That's fine you think that, but I'm not speaking on what you claim I'm speaking on. I'm coming from a place of experience and wisdom. Let's not jump the gun on putting a perception on a general amount of men. It's not healthy for this topic.

    • Show All
  • Anonymous
    While that's technically true, it's really only useful if you have so many options you can afford to turn some down. But if you're not getting any, my suggestion would be to get with girls you can get with and keep practicing. Keep dating and having sex and building skills and gaining experience until you end up having abundance. Only once you feel abundance instead of scarcity will it make sense to turn down good options.
    Like 3 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • ManOnFire

      Also true, yes.

    • t-8900

      I live in an area with a high percentage of AIDS and HIV so I'm deffo not fond of doing that! LOL

    • Anonymous

      @t-8900 Maybe it's time to move, bro.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

1552
  • DizzyDesii
    okay 3 things stood out to me. And i think men like @spartan55 have already established im not the typical thinking female
    #1 THIS
    — “When an open opportunity for sex… it’s not always noble to say yes to it either. Especially if it follows with you getting a disease, getting fired, or getting met by her boyfriend or husband that she may or may not have told you about.”— Shouldve hit home for many but it won't. I’ve never been into just jumping into bed with anyone because a lot of people dont admit to having a girlfriend unless asked and they definitely won't tell you if they have STDs because they feel its easily curable. Plus i have morals and wouldn't give myself to them so easily so yea—Women are oddly (and sometimes foolishly) attracted to men pushing them away.—Will still never describe me. I don't know what bullshit ass women y'all have dealth with but I ain't about it. If i have options, why would i chase the one who doesn't want me or plays hard to get? If i chase its only because he hasn't confessed if he's into me or not. Is that what you mean? Cause that makes more sense. But if you're saying we chase men who have already rejected us then thats a hell no for me. Im not really into “mysterious”. I need to know if we’re on the same page early on cause if we’re not then he's a waste of time. I think you’re describing teen girls instead of “women” cause this sounds like HS bull.
    #3 THIS— Women of today know that men try hard to win them. They sit with them at lunch time trying to appeal to her. They cling to her by walking with her around the workplace or on campus… So many women get used to this, and have become drunk off of it.—I do like having more control but not all the control. My love languages are quality time, words of affirmation, and action. So if he's not doing these things then i won't think he's interested. Once we’ve confessed interest for eachother, I do these things in return because i want to spend time with him. I do not get bored. But if i sense theyre only hanging with me in hopes of getting laid then theyre dumb as hell unless theyre gonna do this for 6 months straight cause i already stated im not having sex anytime less than that. Other sexual things sure. But im not hopping on someones dick so easily. And its not that he didn't “earn it” or “deserve it”. I could be madly in love with the guy and wanting to give it. But its partially religious guilt as well as when i feel isn't “too soon” to have just given myself up. Its more of a subconscious thing for me. But its also me wanting a guy who wants more than sex and also isn't “easy” himself. If a guy gives it up in a month or less, he's easy in my opinion. If he gives it up before theyve established they even love eachother then he's desperate in my opinion. I’d say the same for women who do the same. Both genders may call me a prude and i’d call both a hoe. Idgaf
    Like 4 People
    • ManOnFire

      I mean that a lot of girls - even ones in their 30s - are still chasing men who don't really love or respect them, but turn their backs on men who they've actually had the chance to meet. So this psychological and character malady also somewhat carries over into how they're sometimes more attracted when a guy isn’t showing full interest.

    • DizzyDesii

      Yea I don't know what rat pack that is but i ain't about it

    • spartan55

      @DizzyDesii
      These are all solid, and I appreciate the shout out.

  • CaptainOverthink
    I feel like it's very possible to openly like someone, be a bit flirty and still not chase to get into bed.
    I've actually said no many times.. most I regret because I actually wanted to but felt obliged not to. Because of being too selfless, too kind, insecure or simply inexcusably stupid.
    Latset one was probably good choice though, we work together, she's a mom and has a boyfriend (is not the dad). I enyoj her social company, she's very sexual in her way of interacting and she's super gorgeous.. Tiiight butt.. Just wow!
    But..
    She's flirty with others as well, which devalues the flirtyness with me (don't feel personal). She has a kid, kids need stability: her boyfriend has a stable job, house, makes good money. I don't feel like being the cause to blow things up for her if I can't provide some type of substitute. I care too much, I guess. Even if it's more her responsibility than mine.

    In the end I can maintain my ego if I just get some validation and get to dream about her some. Been without it for so long I know I can take the wait, not going to risk things blowing up in my face unless it's worth it.
    Hate missing out but I love not hating myself as well. I can do without guilt.

    I don't know enough about women though to know if your claims about them holds weight but I do feel like if I've rejected one and others sees it, it's likely interests are higher. That's my biased exeperience. But I have very little of it.
    Like 2 People
    • ManOnFire

      Thanks for your awesome feedback.

  • shaysh87
    I think that you need to be honest with yourself and what you really desire. From my experience, men are usually desperate for sex because they need it more than women. Men have higher sex drives, higher levels of testosterone , which explains why men pursue mates much more aggressively/ proactively compared to women. Men need women more than women need men. Men would rarely ever say no to a woman (unless she is ugly). While women tend to be more selective.

    Sure you can pretend you're not interested in sex or her, but guess what? you're not gonna be scoring any women unless you are willing to play the flirting game or show her some attention. Ignoring a girl or refusing her flirty advances towards you is a great way to maintain your dignity of not seeming desperate but guess what? it also eliminates your chances of scoring her.

    Women do tend to hold the power in sex, romance and dating. Men are always the ones who are the pursuers / chasers who are lucky to get what they can manage to get. Women are less so.
    LikeDisagree 6 People
    • shaysh87

      I can tell you that ignoring a woman is no way of scoring her at all. A girl who still chases you while you're ignoring her, is not because she wants you, its just that she wants your validation. Once she gets that validation or ego boost, she will be gone.

      I've experienced similar things in the past where I had guys who i wasn't really attracted to (ignore me). I did try harder to get their attention but then it really wasn't them that I wanted. I just wanted validation and an ego boost (that i can attract any man on earth). there's a huge difference.

    • ManOnFire

      Which is why I'm advising guys not to go after ones like you.

    • shaysh87

      @ManOnFire

      you can't tell which ones are like me. its time you stop living in your imagination and actually go out to interact with women. Women LOVE ATTENTION. They would date you for attention if they can.

    • Show All
  • Shizunk
    I am not a fan of spearing women through the hips. It's much easier to go for the soft tissue under the ribcage, or horizontally between the ribs straight into the heart muscle.
    In all seriousness, I am not sure who you are even talking to. Guys who want to just get laid and don't care about feelings will hardly sacrifice that rare chance to help maybe fix women as a whole in the long run, hypothetically, but not really. You are bringing water uphill with that idea.
    Those of us who are more conservative will not have casual sex anyway. Shooting down more sexual flirting attempts is a natural instinct once your mind is determined enough.
    Those who are undecided didn't really get a strong argument as to why it is selfishly better for them to turn women down. A couple vague warnings about things potentially going wrong and a whole lot of unconvincing collectivist appeals, followed by an unsupported statement that stable relationships are better. Why? How? I already think men shouldn't sleep around regardless of any opportunities and even I am unconvinced by your argument :-D
    All I got is from it is don't be a pathetic wimp, but if someone literally offers sex and all you have to do is nod stoicly, I don't see a good argument against it in this take.
    Like 2 People
    • ManOnFire

      "Those who are undecided didn't really get a strong argument as to why it is selfishly better for them to turn women down."
      - They did. To regard your own self worth and self-respect when women see you as weak being so desperate to hit her. Which are mostly the guys I'm talking about.

      When you have all these desperate beta simps out here who obviously haven't really had girlfriends or rarely had sex and they're hungry, not only do they make their own selves look weak and pathetic but they encourage women to look at other men the same way.

      "followed by an unsupported statement that stable relationships are better. Why? How?"
      - No statement about stable relationships, but I encouraged guys to actually get to know a woman BEFORE sex happens, even if it's just a friendship.

  • bamesjond0069
    I agree in general but you really don't have to say no all that often or not hookup. This part I just think is wrong "It wasn’t too hard to nail him and get the one and done. So they see you as weak, and move on to the next. This is how you have a lot of women who hook up and then ghost guys when the guys start catching feelings, not seeing how as women they're just as worthless to live a life of getting sex like that."

    These women ghost because the man catches feelings in a sappy way in regards to not saying no to relationship vs sex. Personally i say no to all women for a relationship and fuck everyone. Girls fight over my ass.

    Sex from a woman is valuable, there is a market saying its about $200 to 300. So im not going to say no to that. But what i will say no to is giving a girl literally anything. Im there for free value and to give nothing in return.

    Now i will say no to sex if its not male dominant sex, i won't do anything for sex, thats for a beta. Ill fuck with any cute girl who kneels before me and begs like a worthless little slut.
    Like 2 People
  • t-8900
    I always jerked off twice before dates so I wouldn't be a fool and end up with a life full of regrets. Smart men don't screw until they know what she's about. That's low tier and while I'm not a Virgin I've only had 2:sexilual partners and shot downany over the years. I wish I still had my V card tbh
    Like 2 People
    • ManOnFire

      "Smart men don't screw until they know what she's about." - Very accurate. I never fuck until I can gauge her and I know she's safe. When I hooked up with the last girl, I was the one who talked her into it and she felt okay with me and was safe showing me her body that she said she never felt good about. Her body wasn't beautiful, but I didn’t care because her personality excited me much more.

    • t-8900

      It's fine. We've been sold so much garbage about looks and money defining the two genders. I started falling for a girl who imho was on the knifes edge of being a 5 in looks. But her personality and selflessness towards me turned her into a 10. Personality will always trump looks on the end. You will start looking damn fine if you have a kind heart. At least to me.

    • ManOnFire

      Right! That is exactly how I got so sexually attracted to her for the same reasons.

    • Show All
  • ariadneR
    "Spear her through the hips." 🤣 love the word play
    I agree with all of this, when it's easily attained, the thrill isn't there any more.
    I'd enjoy the reward more if it's something I had to work for
    Like 3 People
    • ManOnFire

      I actually even made my own self horny when I wrote that part😂

  • Assi2k
    All this is true


    I hate when they won’t bend to my female power😡 but I do appreciate a good challenge too😌
    LikeFunny 4 People
    • ManOnFire

      Thank you for being honest👍🏽

    • Sorry I prefer married women.

    • rcljr

      Gotta withhold a wee bit, show no interest, just to get her wondering, she’ll go check her face and hair in the mirror, smell her own pits to ensure they don’t stink she’ll run her finger up the crack of her ass to make sure that also doesn’t smell, all the time wondering why you aren’t coming into her…

    • Show All
  • crazy8000
    Did notice this very early on.

    Some female's even get pissed off because they doesn't get any. especially if I don't make sex happen like being the one taking physical initiative.
    Have lost count how many.
    What many of them haven't realized is that they haven't become attractive due to themselves.


    Very simple math.
    If she takes initiative and tries very hard to take you the higher are the chance that she is really into you and doesn't give up because it get hard..
    Like 2 People
  • jshm2
    Isn't that like food, though? Just because it's there, doesn't mean it's something you need to eat, or partake in?

    The word you're probably looking for is "discipline"
    Like 2 People
    • ManOnFire

      I meant exactly what I said by not saying yes to every woman or situation.

  • lightbulb27
    Agree and that should be better promoted in society. There’s consequences including emotionally physically and maybe spiritually.


    Timely post.. I had two propositions for back alley “massages” yesterday in the city. Saying no was easy for me and honestly I was sad for them… I doubt that is a life anyone should have. But I could see how others less in control and aware and might fall into their web… they were good in sales and should be selling used cars.
    Like 2 People
  • boobliker
    I have always understood that if a Lady wants something and you can give it, You should as most of the time it's a BIG step for to ask, (I have never been asked for sex, it's just happened) I been asked for just about everything else and if poss I have given.
    ..
    still looking...
    Like 1 Person
  • EmbraceThePain
    Agreed, especially if you don’t really like the woman, but she has a nice body, is looking really nice wearing those leggings that day, etc. The temptation is too great and acceptance is almost certain even if the woman isn’t quite attractive or worth it. Men naturally want to have sex with more women, whereas women want to have sex with high quality men. So, men are more quantity and women are more quality.


    We all know that men will have sex with anything and at anytime. Men are not picky, so if you’re a woman who has sex with a man, it doesn’t mean you’re special, attractive, etc.


    The reverse is different. If you’re a man who has sex with women or attracts women, then that by default means you must have something that women like because they are a lot more picky in terms of sex and relationships.
    LikeDisagree 3 People
  • Subarugirl
    I love how you have such strong opinions on the way women think and what is actually going on inside their heads lol
    LikeFunnyDisagree 5 People
  • Dan_cColt
    If you are physically attracted to her go for it but don't make it anything more than having s*x with her and that's the problem men need to understand if you want to do every women go for it but don't take them all or a majority seriously just treat it as a transaction.
    Like 2 People
  • AviatorTom
    I see your point, but we guys have to be careful when we say No to a woman who is offering sex.

    Case in point: During my single days, I dated a woman I met online. She was very attractive, intelligent, and we had two good dates. I was intentionally keeping things slow... I had previously lost a woman by moving too fast. After each date I masturbated thinking about her. At the end of the third date, we went back to her place and made out (kissing, first base only). Back at home, I masturbated again. A few days later, she calls me and breaks up with me. I asked why, and she said, "I'm not feeling the chemistry. If there's no chemistry by the third date, I call things off."

    Moral of the story? It's OK to say yes. Just like it's OK to say No. But be ready to be disappointed if you say No when you should have said Yes.
    Like 1 Person
    • ManOnFire

      Now this is true. I had a similar experience like that once years ago with a lady who was a customer at a retail store I had worked at. We exchanged numbers and things were heating up, but I passed it. And regretted it, yeah.

  • Levin
    Well written take.

    I've had a lot of opportunity at cheap sex, but I always say no. I can do better than that and respect myself.

    Too many guys are pathetic and have no self control.
    Like 2 People
  • hi_it_is_me123
    I really dont understand why many or some men think that it is great to get sex so easy. Imagine that many prostitutes offer you sex. Is this really great for you? This is how it feels for me.
    Therefore, easy men who sey yes to every woman is like a free prostitute to me. So i dont understand why some men think that it is great to get sex so easy as woman.
    This is also why men who say yes to every woman is turn off. Then I like men with self control and so i really appreciate virgin/non promiscuos men who did not have sex with many women despite being pressured to be a hoe lol. Virgin shaming maybe also a reason for this
    LikeDisagree 11 People
    • I also want to add that i have nothing againt promiscuos people. It is perfectly ok if you want to be promiscuos as long as you use protection. I did not mean to slut-shame any man (or woman). I can't control what it is attractive to me. So i would not date promiscuos men but i would respect their life style as long as they ain't hypocritical

    • Well, men and women are physiologically different, so women don't feel the same way about sex than men do.

    • Women also like sex but there are many consequences. You could get stds even if you use protection. Some sexual transmitted diseases can spread through kissing, oral sex etc.

    • Show All
  • CamembertAnus
    I agree that being unavailable attracts women much more than being desperate.

    However, I disagree that therefore, men should play hard to get or not chase women.

    I think you should in fact do the opposite: You should chase more women. This will:

    a) Make you more accustomed and less sensitive to being in the company of women you find attractive. Basically, it will make you calmer around them. This is attractive.

    b) Improve your social skills specifically in the context of women you find attractive.

    c) Increase your dating opportunities.

    Most importantly, this will actually make you harder to get, because you will be busy interacting with lots of women you find attractive.

    It is better to BE hard to get than to pretend you're hard to get.

    P. S. Blaming cultural narratives for women having more options is a mistake. This phenomenon is not exclusive to humans and has its basis in evolution. Sex is costlier to women than it is to men. So women are picky, and men are horny.
    Like 1 Person
  • VanillaSalt
    Lamp are you stupid or something? The guys that don’t say yes are low because 1 women do not approach and ask 2 very few men don’t want sex and 3 both 1 and 2 have to happen at the same time lol.
    Like 2 People
  • Show More (47)
Loading...