2 mo

Why I don't pay for sex.

Lost_in_the_Woods

So I saw this question...

"What do you think of this response?"

"So he said after a year, his girlfriend has lost interest in sex with him. I just asked him if it was better in the beginning, and he said it wasn’t much better back then.

My reply was simple: I said to dump her. But I’m not asking you for your opinion about my reply, because I don’t care what you think about my reply.

I’m asking you what you think about this psychologist’s reply to a woman on her radio show.

The wife calls in and says her husband is horrible because he wants sex 2-3 times per week with her, but she’s never in the mood. She said she no longer feels sexy about herself, and her husband isn’t as romantic as he was when he was younger. She went on to say her husband often times comes home, eats dinner and falls asleep in his chair.

This is the rough transcript of the conversation.

Doc : Why do you suppose he falls asleep?

Wife : Well, lately he’s had to work 16 hours per day so we can keep up.

Doc : When did he start beating you?

Wife : He’s never laid a hand on me, he’s a really nice guy.

Doc : But he’s a crappy father?

Wife : He’s an awesome father. The kids love him.

Doc : So he’s just lazy and not a good provider.

Wife : He’s not lazy, and he’s a great provider.

Doc : So you’re telling me he’s a good husband, father and a great provider, but you’re too lazy to lie on your back three times per week for 15 minutes?

Wife: Well………uh……..

So after the commercial break, the doc announced that her phones absolutely lit up all across the country, and her staff had a hard time keeping up. Women said:

*Shit, I’ll take him!

*Can I get his contact information?

*What’s his phone number?

*I wish my man was like him."

And its safe to say I've thought about it a lot. . .

I feel strongly that sex should be an intimate and romantic mutually desired experience rather that a currency, good, service or token.

That said, we all get horney. It's biological. If she/he doesn't want to fuck you, chances are it isn't because they don't want to fuck at all. It's either because they want to do it with someone else, or that something is wrong. Exhaustion, stress, depression, lack of time or health, etc...

I think the modern feminist ideology that 'a man should be forbidden from even WANTING to have sex with a woman unless she has already made up her mind to choose that moment and that man', is toxic and blatantly sexist/dishonest.

I'm no butterfly but I've had enough female friends to know they talk just like the guys do if not worse, they are just less honest and up front about it.

To tie all that together, my opinion is pretty much the same as yours. Find someone who does want to. Find someone who isn't offended by your attraction to them and actually reciprocated it.

I don't want a woman who reluctantly or obediently lies on her back for 15 minutes a few times a week for a free house and a paycheck. If I did, I could buy a hooker and leave my socks on the floor. I want someone who wants me. I want someone who participates. I want someone who drags me in the bedroom and ties me up and tries to suffocate me... But it's not the details that matter.

My response is, it's not so much about the sex or lack thereof. It's about the relationship, it's about the passion, it's about the romance and and affection and the energy. If you don't want to be a part of that, we could be business partners... but only if you pull your weight. And I don't pay my coworkers rent.

The sad truth is that from where I'm sitting, it's obvious that the vast majority of women don't want either of those things. They don't want romance, love, affection and passion, and they don't want an equally and mutually beneficial business partnership. Most young women are told a man is to "respect" them by paying for everything, never asking for anything, and staring at the floor until he is called upon.

That was wrong when men did it to women, and it's just as wrong when they do it to us. But the big difference is that doesn't work on most men. We aren't able or interested in being controlled. I'm happy enough with my cat and my own imagination. I'm sick of spending half my life working for 15 minutes of unsatisfying sex. Love of my life, hottest girl I have ever met, and after ten years, I've never been more disappointed. Honestly, wanted my pizza and chocolate milk back because I got more out of those than I did out of a floppy blow up doll with a pulse who actively avoids eye contact. I couldn't get into that. I felt like I was being a pest and I just wanted out of the situation.

Would I do it again? Not unless I thought it would be different. Would I pick my socks up and move the toilet seat twice every time I had to piss? Not unless you paid me. Would I split my income in half? For what? Porn is free and a hooker is like $200. And I've never wanted one anyways...

So my response is that the doctors opinion isn't much better than the wife's. "Lay there and let it happen for the money" isn't the answer.

Wake the fuck up, snap out of the fucking trance. Live a little bit. Eat things that have real colors and flavors and you might see some come through in the rest of your life. Stop painting your face and start painting a picture of what you want your life to be like.

People like sex. That's all but universal.

If you feel like it's a chore something else is wrong.

I think it's becoming so common because our society is so broken that most people lose touch with their own humanity. Our minds are suffering the decline and desensitization of genuine feeling and emotion that we literally pay for because it's got a catchy tag line and they said it would make the other slaves jealous.

I'm not jealous. I'd rather spend that time with my cat. She has the energy, she has the passion, she shows the affection and the ability and the excellence to captivate my emotions.

Fuck sex. If you aren't excited to see me I'm gonna go sleep by myself.

And maybe that's my loss. But I keep my joy, I keep my energy, I keep my income and I leave my socks on the floor.

I tell people if I can't find a girl who adds more to my life than my cat does I won't waste my time with it.

I don't need sex. I don't want kids. I'm looking for a life that makes me want to get up and live it.

I don't mind paying the bills, I was going to do that anyways. For me it's more about the time I'd have to invest in picking up my socks and the compromises I'd have to make on my own dreams.

Lifeless sex doesn't come close to paying that bill. Passion does, romance does, excitement does, building a team and a family and a home we can love is worth more than money. But that's the real problem. It's not about sex.

Sex is supposed to be the cherry on top. You can't take my Christmas presents, hand me a limp bow and expect me to thank you for it like I owe you a free house. Keep your sex. Sell it to drooling babies on the internet. If you aren't there for the romance you should have your own apartment.

And I should have a seat ready for someone who is.

I don't beg for sex. I don't feel it's owed to me or complain about not having it. I have bigger goals. You buy the whole cake, you get the frosting for free. There's a reason you don't see grown men eat a tub of frosting with a spoon. The first scoop is great, the second one is less fun and pretty soon you just get sick of it.

If you see me buying just the frosting, it's because the cake is at home hot and ready for it.

Only a child would be satisfied with one half or the other.

Even Thomson knew that "Sex without love is as hollow and ridiculous as love without sex." And he sucked at love. I'm looking for better end than he found.

Tinder boys might say "don't waste my time" but they don't even know what that means.

So, I'm no shrink, but I have some advice for the both of them. 🤣

Get a life, find a dream, and go do it properly.

Buy the ticket, take the ride. Sex feels better when you start out happy.

Sandra Dawn Conklin
Sandra Dawn Conklin

[Original post:This is in regards to a question a GAG fella asked. What do you think of this reply?]

#sex #society

Why I don't pay for sex.
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Lliam
    I agree in the sense that it's pointless to be with a woman who doesn't enjoy sex. Fucking a begrudging or indifferent starfish would be a drag. A women who didn't enjoy giving sensual BJs or who had no desire to be pleasured would be no fun. A women who wouldn't engage in sex at all would be no woman at all. Either scenario would create depression.

    Life is for living. It should be joyful. And passionate sex can be the one thing that makes it worth living.
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • SamIam96
    Thanks for taking the time to write this. You've clearly given the subject a lot of consideration. And, I agree with much of what you've said.

    @flirtatiousgirl, I've read many of your questions. I even followed you for a while. You're young, missing the whole point of relationships between men and women. Or, maybe not. You and @Lost_in_the_Woods couldn't be more different, tho. You seem to be interested in pursuing the exact transactional relationship that he rants about. The difference is, if you find what you want, over time you will be bored. If he finds what he wants, he will live happily into old age.
  • flirtatiousgirl
    Bc you're poor
    LikeDisagree 2 People
    • You can't imagine how much I spend on dabs and motorcycle parts xD

      I wouldn't pay for sex if I was a billionaire.

  • EffaMan
    İ like that
  • Anonymous
    We all pay for it one way or another
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