Sex on the third date? Too soon?

Question

So I have been talking with this guy for almost 3-4 weeks. he's 20 im 18
He was so sweet and nice the first couple of dates but after the third, it all just crashed.
We had sex on the third date, I planned not to, but i couldn't help it. i always have this problem about sleeping with guy too soon :(
anyway, he's acting really weird since that 3rd date... He still texts me first, likes all my posts, but now it takes him hours to reply... im really confused.
after the sex, i was upset, VERY UPSET, and i cried, i think he heard me so he rolled over to me and cuddled me asked whats wrong, i told him its not about him! or the sex, but just the fact that i always do this to myself and give up too soon, maybe im just emotionally slutty... lol. 
anyway, we had a talk about the whole thing, asked him what we are whatsoever he said "i dont know, im going back to work and racing again soon and i will be travelling a lot and i dont know if it would work. i like you and im very attracted to you but i just dont know yet" and i said, "yea i understand and its too soon to tell but i just wanted to know.."
long story short, in the morning when he dropped me home i was like "im sorry about the things i asked/said last night and he was like "no its fine im happy we talked about it:)"
anyway, after that he said he wanted to hang out the next thursday, but i couldnt make it so i said maybe Saturday then? and he said, yeah sure then that night he was like im busy Saturday so maybe friday? i said yes, and on  Friday  morning he then said i can't make it im sorry...
this is the THIRD maybe FOURTH TIME he said he can't make it.. and its really annoying me. he did it twice before the third date and after the third date he has excuses again.
i dont know what the hell is going on and i kinda dont want to ask as i am just trying to figure it out through his actions rather than words. did i scare him off? what do you think he wants? i dont know if i should keep trying

funkipunk · Accepted Answer

I don't think it was too soon for having sex. It seems to me that the both of you didn't know how to handle your situation after sex though. And by both of you thinking your relationship would become awkward, you've made it awkward.

I don't know what his deal is with canceling the dates, but that's his problem. You shouldn't blame yourself for deciding to have sex with a guy after three dates. Most guys would not screw over a girl after just having sex with her, especially if they'd already been out with her three times. I'm not concluding that this guy is screwing you over either, I'm saying how three dates until sex usually doesn't cause any problems.

I recommend finding a way to go back to how things were before sex. It was only two people getting physically intimate. If anything, the experience should be bring you two closer together, not create this chasm in your relationship.

thisGUYknows · Accepted Answer

i think your just paranoid and expecting bad things to happen. if u keep pushing him away he's eventually gonna give up. just be yourself. try to forget u ever slept with him. you're making things more complicated than they are. i kno ur young but this is the age where u learn about yourself. you're supposed to make mistakes now while ur young so u stop making them as u get older. but let it go. just be safe and let life happen. u don't have to tell anyone when things go wrong. just keep a mental note for next time =)

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Too soon, but don't beat yourself up, that doesn't help. Honestly, it sounds like he's still deciding if he wants this or not. I'd say distance yourself, give him time while you thinkthink about if you want this guy/this relationship, and notice the other guys around you. Seriously that whole delaying the date thing (for a full week) would just piss me off and make me think he isn't excited/interested. If sex hadn't have happened, would that be OK?

apropos · Answer

It's too soon.

Metal189 · Answer

the general rule is the third date, however, never do something you're not sure of. if you have to ask when to have sex, you're probably not ready

bh6676r942 · Answer

Yeah if you don't even like the guy yet why try to act so slutty i mean seriously. If he wants a girlfriend who's slutty let him go find some one else.