Sexual Relationships
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Guys: How do I make my boyfriend want me in bed, now that I am fat?

I have been with my bf almost two years now. Long story but I moved to alaska which is where we live and met him here. when we met i was about 130 lbs. and things were great. sex all the time, cards and flowers for no reason... but that has faded into almost a rumour now. He says the reason he is not interested now is because I'm fat. I now weigh 178 lbs. i am 5'4". I did not realize how fat i was until about a month ago. two snowy dark winters of sitting around the house eating all that holiday food and not going anywhere or doing much and that fat just snuck up on me. I am NOT lazy and I am NOT ok with being fat. Since I realized I'm fat i have been watching what i eat and working out like CRAZY. i work six days a week (45+ hours) at a cannery and then workout 2-3 hours a night EVERY night. Weights and cardio... and I am noticing improvement in my fitness level and appearance. BUT... i need to lose about 60 lbs. overall, and there is NO way to do that quickly. So my question is: how do i get him to be more interested in me and more affectionate between now and my fitness goal? I don't want to wait six months to make love again. If i ask we have sex, maybe once a week, sometimes less. But it feels like a mercy f**k and i hate that. The kicker is i am an absolute animal in bed. I like it rough, and hard, and passionate, and frequently. I LOVE sucking his c*ck... and to my credit i am wicked good at it. Deepthroat while licking balls, balls in my mouth, etc. I'm down for almost anything... but lately it is hard to talk him into a blowjob even, much less sex... the lack of action is driving me nuts, makes me want to punch holes in stuff (really fuels my workouts so a small positive there) i am sure that if i had a dick and he was the chick i would have already repeatedly violently raped him... lol. Is being fat really that big of a turn off or do we have other problems? Does he really love me if my being fat can make him stop hugging and kissing me? Guys let me know.
0 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • Tell him sex helps burn calories, it's true and it's what guys say to woman all the time. Plus you can say shit like "Fuck me till I'm hot!"

    As far as a weight problem being a concern well the way you take care of yourself is a big deal. It might not be because your puggy (honestly fat is a lot more than 75 pounds) but because you stopped taking care of yourself and that bugs him and it's coming out as "she got fat, ew". If you can get back to your preferred poundage then he'll love you even more but just knowing that you're working out he should be supporting you. This may be a personality flaw or many things but try and lead him into supporting you. Try and say "bb, I bumped up my workout load today and I'm tired. Can you help me wash my back?" when you get back from the gym. Ask him what flavor sports drinks he likes so he can take it to work with him. Oh, and try new recipes with him that can help you lose weight. Salads with meat in it is a nice start especially seeing as you can put as much meat on it as you want so he can have more and you can keep that count low. Simple things like that will help but him not being supportive is still bugging me. He may simply not know how or had bad experiences with being supportive. Either way, figure that out before things get too serious and def try my tips.

    • First of all after time has pasted sex is not as important any more he has u and it dose not bother us not to have sex 24/7 like with u women. But any way. We can go on strike all we won't but when we see that pussy and smell it are sex drive get going. So little thing naked in front of him and do secret nasty things like bend over so that pussy is all out and juicy looking. I can be fat but being u put on 50 pounds and making that thing any less tasty. And that time once a week u have sex u have to build him up and get him supper horny and make him need it ASAP make him dream about what u just did. I no for me I could care less about sex but when I see pussy I wanna eat it and if it's all slimy I really wanna get in there. I'm sure u no what gets him going. U women always want us to do every thing take are dick and do what u want to it.

  • He still cares for you, he just doesn't find you attractive. The only reason he does anything with you right now is because he still cares. Lose the weight and he should start wanting you physically again.

    • But what can i do between now and then, i have a fair bit to lose and no matter how hard i push myself that will take at least a few months... anything i can do to fan the spark for now? for legal reasons he cannot watch p*rn or i would buy him some videos.

Most Helpful Girls

  • If you want him to want you the only thing you can do is lose weight. However, if he loses interest so easily, I'd dump him.

  • Honestly if he quit wanting you and caring about you for THAT I don't think much of him as a person

    • He still cares about me. He is sweet and kind and so good to me... just not affectionate anymore. and to be fair he told me from the beginning "don't get fat"

    • Well it's good he still cares about you

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 12

  • You sound very enthusiastic, and I think he just doesn't have enough sex drive. If he was really attracted to women, he'd still be into it every day. He could even help you lose weight by sexercise.

    You might look better if you lost the 60 lbs, but it shouldn't really take that to still be attractive to him.

  • You were 130 pounds when you met him and you are 178 pounds now. Thats over 35% increase. How could you not see that till a month ago?

    You are definitely less visually appealing. But what is more important to him is that you were going downhill and just kept going and that seems like you just don't care how you appear to him. His interest had to start leaving before you noticed your gain. So it appears that the problem is your weight gain AND you not caring till things headed downhill.

    Keep working at losing the weight and in general making yourself more healthy. It will take time, but the rewards will come as you get closer to your goals.

  • He, will come back around as you start losing. It shouldn't take long for the weight to start coming off.

  • Some nice lingerie can help. Often its the lose flabby skin that turn people off. A good corset, black stockings, etc., etc.. You could even go full dominatrix.

  • stop stuffing your face

  • Keep working out and lose the weight. Sex just isn't the same when you're overweight.

  • Oh dear, you're really in a pickle. :)

    The problem is that any guy can see that no matter what you decide to peg your weight at it is highly likely to change anyway. A couple of seasons of the same thing and you'll gain it back.

    So, the solution is you picked a fussy guy instead of one that loves YOU and not what you LOOK like - I would cut him loose and find one that all this doesn't matter to. Then you can be skinny or fat, it doesn't matter, and it's not really that important in the big scheme of things anyway.

  • Obviously, he still cares for You because he is still with You. He probably just not attracted by you anymore at this moment. You Can love dolphins and not love Whales.
    Seriously, how Can You go from 59 kilograms to 80 kilograms surtout noticing it?
    To answer the question, You need to be patient. He is still there and it is a good point for You. Keep this in mind.

  • "He says the reason he is not interested now is because I'm fat."

    Tell him to gtfo. That is pretty fucked up. What if you two got serious and you got pregnant? You will bloat up and be big again then he won't have sex again?

  • Grind on him

  • Keep eating fuck it who cares If he can’t fuck u then something wrong with him

    • Far is not a turn off I assume u got big boobs nd a fat ass

  • He's shallow and was obviously only into you for your pre weight gain looks nothing more, keep in mind if he's not getting it from you he's getting it from somewhere!!

  • Help him see the benefits of sleeping with a girl with little more jiggle

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