Is it bad that I get jealous of my boyfriend being turned on by other women?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend was looking at pictures of an attractive woman on a Facebook page & my head was on his chest so I could hear his heart beat & as the pictures got raunchier his heart rate began to rise & that made me feel unattractive & awkward that my boyfriend was being turned on by another woman right in front of me.. Am I overreacting? Is it normal for a guy to be in a relationship and still get turned on by other woman? I will be grateful for any type of advice

[Ozanne]

I can totally understand that you would feel jealous, but I can tell you that men do NOT equate looking at photos the way we do. Men become stimulated by attractiveness and don't associate that with the person they are looking at. Let's go to an extreme: if men watch p*rn, they are not thinking so much of the girl that they are watching but the ACT of sex which is a turn on. Attractiveness from a woman can do the same thing. Now, I know you're probably thinking, "But why doesn't he start sprouting hard ons around me all the time since I'm his girlfriend?" He probably did when he first met you, but seeing something new out of the blue can stimulate him without notice. Also, getting an erection does not mean he wants to have sex with the girl he's looking at. It just means he saw something - given any object that excited him at that moment. Could be a good looking girl, or a plant, or a motorbike, men just can't help when they see something they like only to get a reaction in their pants. I'm sure if they could, they would prefer to have the ability to turn this off at certain times to save embarrassment.

Be jealous if he began contacting her behind your back or making moves on women. But as for looking and occasionally getting hard when he sees something, this is no threat to your sex life, and if you want to really tease him, tell him you'll "look after his erection for him" when it happens. He probably won't know what hit him.

[Asker]

Wow, never thought of it like that.. My first thought was that he wasn't attracted to me anymore, or I was doing something wrong in the bedroom that made him bored.. I agree with the whole being jealous if he starts to look elsewhere.. I'm just become really paranoid when I'm in a serious relationship

[Ozanne]

Understandable. But I'm sure that this isn't the case. If you can learn to separate that the reasons he gets erections are almost nothing to do with having sex, then you will probably not feel so bad. And men like the look of women, and will instantly notice attractiveness but not think about how they can pull and fast one and cheat on you. They are simply reacting to something they see, and whatever it is they like, seemed to do it at the moment. When you say something or look a certain way to give him excitement, he'll get erect for you too. Only with you, he'll want to follow through and have sex with. With anything else that might give him an erection, not likely. Men get hard all the time, but often times, the erection dies off after a short time. When you stimulate him, he can remain hard and want sex. Seeing a photo of an attractive girl probably did it at the moment, just like anything would that seemed appealing for the moment.

[rotinaj10]

One of the finest answers in the history of gag. Well done. :)

[Asker]

Thank you :3

[WCM78]

What in the hell? You have every right to feel that way. Honestly, it's disrespectful of him to do that in front of you. The saying goes a good man does make his woman jealous of other women, he makes other women jealous of her.
Talk to your boy & set him straight. Understand, everyone has insecurities which are the responsibility of the owner, but the one you're with should never contribute to them.

[Asker]

Every time I try to talk to him it just turns into an argument..

[WCM78]

That should tell you more about him, as your boyfriend, then you as a girlfriend. Don't stay in a relationship with someone you can't talk to, or wants to make you feel bad about yourself. No one deserves that. I would advise you take a break away from him. Allow yourself to filter through what you feel about him, the relationship, & yourself. And trust me, if that relationship ends, there are PLENTY of real men out there who know how to make a woman feel like a goddess. If your man can't do that, upgrade & don't look back.

[WCM78]

One more thing, don't ever allow anyone to make you feel you don't deserve better. You're young. The sooner you learn & understand that, the better your life overall will be. Keep your head up.

[Asker]

I can't take a break even if I wanted to.. He's been kicked out of his home and he nowhere else to go😏

[WCM78]

Sweetie... that's not your problem. You need to let him worry about him & you worry about you for awhile. I know that sounds cold, but there are going to be times in your life where doing what's in your best interest has to be done, even if it means hurting a jerk's feelings.

[Anonymous]

i don't think many people would like that if they are doing it right in front of you

[Asker]

Do you think I should confront him? But I don't want it to turn into a massive argument:/

[Opinion Owner]

You could just casually mention that you'd rather him not look up pictures of girls when you are right next to him

[Asker]

That could work.. thank you

[katydollxx]

no its not bad