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Why do promiscuous men and women regret their promiscuity?

I have been reading numerous questions that relate to promiscuity and there have been a number of users stating that they regret being promiscuous. My question to those people is why? You didn't have any hesitations about being promiscuous before so why are you having regrets about it now? Is it because you are afraid that people will find you disgusting and will reject you when you reveal that you have had a promiscuous past?
I regret being promiscuous
Vote A
I don't have any regrets
Vote B
I just want to view the poll
Vote C
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
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1 1

Most Helpful Girls

  • whether or not one says I do not have any regrets, most of women who are promiscuous will regret it when they go upper than 35. mostly because in those ages the chance to find partners will become less and less and the need for stability will become more. and by the lifestyle which they have chosen they will be unable to have a stable partner and form a stable sex/love life then.

    The promiscuous people operate in a delusion of independence and power that they have found in modern days easy life especially and again in a delusion that their youth gives to them. they act upon a simple need instead of a long standing need. and they think they can do it as successfully as they do in their younger ages forever. which they will be disappointed about it in older ages.

    the same applies to men. whether average or above average. but men who are above average, or even average have a better chance in shifting and changing their lifestyle if they want. especially when they get older and financially more stable. this is not bringing up the argument about girls valuing only money, that is another topic. But at the same time that we say 'wealth' is not important for women, financial 'stability' is important. because a financially stable man gives the impression of safety for her and her children in the future to her. so financial stability is important for a woman when she wants to marry. And so a man in his mid 30's who was somehow promiscuous in his younger ages with a change in attitude and the financial stability that he found through some years have a higher chance for a complete change in the lifestyle. though many of these men who were not committed in younger ages will continue to be promiscuous even when forming a family. so being promiscuous naturally makes one less desirable and also less successful in the committed relationships.

    but in the same situation as men women will usually not have the chances that a man will find for change near to his middle ages.

    • 1. because she is not the approaching one. she must usually wait to get approached. 2. because men seek freshness, in any age that they are. That is why many men in older ages too are more attracted to women who are in their 20’s. while most women are naturally attracted to men older than themselves. So there are many women who are younger than them further in the line of preference of men who are the same age as them. So the same promiscuous man who is the same age as them is more likely to change his lifestyle with a committed younger woman or a promiscuous younger woman, and the committed men in her age too will most likely prefer a committed woman. and here her chances will be less and less as her age goes higher. So naturally a promiscuous woman will have more problems than men. she may have financial stability or she may not. and she will have more hardship in finding a stable sex/love life.

    • apart from the fact that both will have many problem related to stability of their lives in the future.

    • You have quite articulate views on these matters--I remember reading your posts a day or so ago on a thread regarding "rape culture" and was surprised at some of the ways it mirrors my own, particularly regarding the relationship of morality inherited from the religions of Abraham. Of course, that's a bit off topic for this thread. But I find my own views partially mirrored here as well. That said, I have not formally studied these matters, but have mainly pieced these ideas together from my own experience and hearing anecdotes, reading, etc. I am curious, what is your background in these topics?

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  • I am far from being promiscuous but the few times I had sex early on in a relationship, I do regret. Why? It places the whole relationship into a Status Unknown. Is he there for sex only from now on? Did he lose respect? Does he think I do this all the time? Bottom line for ME is that I value my body and deserve better. I deserve to be loved, not f*&%ed. I have too much respect for myself to give myself away randomly. If he doesn't see it, he isn't what I thought he was and he'll never get it anyway.

    • I don't understand the logic in this maybe I'm just thick. You'd have thought you would learned your lesson after the first instance.

    • Come off the high horse, dude. I have NEVER had sex with someone I did not carry on to see for long term afterwards. The point was that when I had sex earlier in the relationship it cast doubts on the entire thing for a while in my own head. I am hoping to maybe encourage people to have a little respect for themselves.

    • It's got nothing to do with a high horse. If that's how you felt after having sex early on then why do it the second time and so on? It just doesn't make sense to me.

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  • media.giphy.com/media/140lcuYKYpVWGA/giphy.gif

    Most of us don't have any regrets or hell at least I don't.

    I think most people that have regrets either get shamed into it by people calling them sluts and whores and stuff or they became religious later on in life.

Most Helpful Guys

  • Nope. I have no regrets. My experiences are my own, which influenced my evolution

    And the truth is, that is, for some, regardless of gender, if you are attractive, and just so happened to be promiscuous, but are no longer, you will have little trouble of finding quality people to date who are willing to overlook your past. This, however, often does not apply to mediocre or unattractive looking people who were promiscuous or easy.

    • I won't go near a girl that has a promiscuous past.

    • That's your choice. But, I know men and women who were promiscuous and have no trouble dating quality people.

    • But are those people quality people?

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    • Not even one letter? :D

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What Girls & Guys Said

3 10

  • Have you been promiscuous before?

    • No I don't agree with promiscuity, so I don't engage in it. I just wanted to get an insight from those in the know.

    • Karma is the reason why there is regret. I've suffered mine. no more.

    • Would you care to expand on this further? What role has karma played? What have you suffered if you don't mind me asking?

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  • I think they realise that they can't erase things if they feel they made mistakes. U can't take back sleeping with somebody, and many people wish they could

    • It's a shame these men and women didn't think about regret prior to being promiscuous eh!

    • I agree.

  • I only regret it for religious reasons. I don't care about what others think on it.

    • So, you stopped being promiscuous?

    • @MoonMice No.

    • So, you won't regret it anymore in the future? Because, why would you continue to do something that you know you'll regret afterwards. I mean, "regret" indicates you think it's "bad".

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  • I find it quite amazing how most of these people voted no regrets because in the first place, these are the same thick headed people who find sex as something of a casual activity therefor have no real value to it in life. They won't understand that sex is something to regret, its not in their brain to comprehend.

  • Their actions don't align with their beliefs. Usually alcohol plays a role in making these "bad" decisions. You don't think as clearly when you're gettinh sexual with someone too

    • If people cannot handle their alcohol then they shouldn't drink.

    • Uh huh. People realize this after finding out the hard way.

    • No they don't because I drink and I get drunk and I have never blacked out or last control of what I'm doing.

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  • Because they catch AIDS and die.

  • No regrets here. I know that for some people the number of previous partners is a dealbreaker, but that's their problem.

  • I don't regret NOT being promiscuous, if that's worth anything.

    • I feel the same way.

  • No regrets, in fact i am quite proud of thre pantie collection i have build up, from taking a souvenir of every one night stand i have had.

  • I don't regret any of my sexual encounters.

  • I think people more regret doing things they didn't want to do in the first place, but gave into for various reasons. I just read a similar regret story today from a young woman who saved herself for marriage to fit in her church culture. People regret not having the will to make their own decisions wisely.

    • That's silly to me in terms of promiscuity because nobody is forcing anyone to be promiscuous.

    • Not force, just making decisions out of lonliness or low self esteem or hopes of social status. Etc.

    • Is it bad of me to find those reasons weak and pathetic?

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  • No regrets here. I think it's more common for females to have regrets about their promiscuity.

    And no, I do not believe that is mostly due to society's judgment of promiscuous women. I believe women judge themselves for being promiscuous for the same reason society judges them for it.

  • This is a bigger problem for girls than guys since it causes them more difficulty later in getting a relationship.

    • Is this because of the double standard that exists in society where it's deemed acceptable for men to engage in promiscuity and not women?

    • Asker, ya hit the nail on the head there bud.

    • Pretty much--yeah. That and the fact that most women would rather have a guy who's signaled his value by being successful with women than a guy who hasn't been in a relationship, whereas the opposite is true to some extent for guys as they consider women.

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