He makes sexual comments. But we are just friends. WHY?

[throughtheglass]

So I have bit of a past with this guy that I consider a friend now, and his sometimes sexual comments confuse me. This is the background: We met almost a year ago at my birthday and hooked up. He lives a couple of hours away, so we kept in touch through the internet and stuff, and he visited sometimes. We were obviously into each other, but he lost interest and when I finally confessed to him that I liked him a lot, he rejected me saying that he talked himself out of his feelings. I got mad and told him that I couldn't talk to him for a while so that I could stop liking him. He agreed, but then about a month later contacted me (which I specifically told him not to do) and I got mad again. Then, after I felt that I was over him, I contacted him and we started talking again. It was awkward at first,but now I feel like I know him TONS better and am more comfortable with him than before; like I said, I truly consider him a friend now. However, on two occasions, he has said some really flirty and sexual things that I sort of find inappropriate for our level of friendship (we're friends, but not like BEST friends or anything). EXAMPLE: I was talking to him late at night while I was djing at my school's radio station, and he said, after we had been having a good conversation for a while, "do you want to know something? I really want to beat it right now, but I'm too lazy" (meaning he wanted to jerk off) He also does things like calling me "baby" in the context of things like, "maybe baby," which he doesn't do usually. i don't understand why he would say that? we had had a conversation before about how he thought that his conversations with girls had to be flirty to be fun, but I disagreed and said I thought flirty conversations were stupid and not worth my time, so we never really flirted with each other after our initial interest in each other. what is he doing? does he really feel saying that is appropriate, because I certainly don't. I have other guy friends that that would be fine with, but that's only because I am better friends with them than I am with him. OH, IMPORTANT FACT. before, when I confessed, I said I was open to being friends with benefits but he said he wouldn't do that because he respected me too much. HALP!

[davyjones]

er. sh*t. ha. the old friend/lovers one. do you like me? well stop f***ing with me then. and go find someone else. do you like me? well kiss me then you wimp! seriously. if you can be cool about it you can't lose. the bigger question is what happens to your friendship the moment you touch. and that's how you want to look at this. still its a two way thing and it might be a good idea to front him. don't plan it just remember the words and when you're in a good mood and he tries that sh*t next time smile a big smile and drop him like a motherf***a. say it like banter. if he don't want to kiss you laugh and say you're sh*t! then go find someone else and next time he calls your on a date mate.

[Karmann]

ok, either

A-He still wants you sexually (but he declined friends with benefits which is UNHEARD of, so NO)

or

B-You two are truly just friends, when men are friends 1 in every 5 sentences is a sexual comment! Sometimes 1 in 2, actually, if beer is involved, 1 in 1 !

[throughtheglass]

Ok, cool, I really hope B is the case! but I only have one other guy friend that does things like this, and I KNOW he is kidding because we are really good friends and it really is just him having a perverted sense of humor. but with this guy... I don't know really. we aren't good enough friends, I don't think, for him to be saying stuff like that. and really, I think most guys would refrain from saying things like that to their friends that are girls, right?

[Olivia9]

I think he wants to get a rise out of you, you told him that you don't like it and he might just be teasing you by sayin hey baby and stuff like that. Maybe he is getting to comfortable with you like the jerking off comment was pretty funny and I doubt he meant that he wanted you to do it for him or anything like that. I think that because you guys are friends that he feels aafe enough with you to kinda be himself and be flirty and fun without hurting your feelings. He also might have been being a show off for the station. I don't think that he is hitting on you or anything like that and it's nice to know that he respects you too much to have friends with benefits.

[Xahal]

Maybe he changed his mind and now wants friendship with benefits!.

If he declined the first time saying he respects you , it isn't the case anymore since he's making sexual comments !

[cjwright79]

What do YOU want? Is he attractive to you?