My boyfriend is always pissed off at me for no reason. Can someone tell me what I'm doing wrong?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend is always pissed off at me. I'm walking on eggshells with everything I do and it's pretty stressful on top of other things. We have to work this out. I currently live with him and I have to be around him everyday but his attitude is really making me regret this decision. Today, he has this Family Fued app on his phone and he kept asking me to give me the answer to his questions and I couldn't think of anything so I said I don't know and came up with something at the top of my head. He lost the game, slammed down his phone and called me a b*tch for NO APPARANT reason. Yesterday, I tried to hug him while we were television on the couch. He pushes me away and say that he's too hot. So I moved away and than later that night, he got horny and started touching me. No warning or anything and I told him to stop. He started calling me names and cursed at me. So I just turned around, cried and went to sleep. Two days ago, he was running late for work. His alarm went off but he had it on snooze. I was already awake, but was in the shower and he did tell me to wake up in 5, but 5 mins turned into 10 mins so he was running a little late and I didn't even want to hear him rant so I left. I can't seem to do anything right. We weren't always like this and he wasn't always this way. When we first moved in together, we weren't so cold and distanced. But now, he's turned into a real monster to live with and has threatened to kick me out of my own home on so many occasions (when I was staying over my moms or at a friends place). I really need some advice. What should I do?

[Anonymous]

If you think this guy is ok to be with, you have issues.

"and than later that night, he got horny and started touching me. No warning or anything and I told him to stop. He started calling me names and cursed at me. So I just turned around, cried and went to sleep."

Wtf?

Then he's always verbally abusing you and you think it's because you piss him off, not that you just met a fucked up guy. You're just lucky he hasn't beat you up yet. Leave before he does.

[Asker]

But why has he changed so drastically? I've lived with him for over a year. I never had this issue until now.

[Opinion Owner]

Honestly, I think a lot of relationships do change over time, but probably not this much. He could of just been hiding his true colours all this time, because no abusers really start early, they all start when the relationship has become more comfortable, otherwise hardly anybody would have an issue because they'd find it so easy to walk away. He could be under major stresses right now. Proper major stress, not just minor things. If he smokes weed, it could be that. There's probably a million reasons why he could of changed so much. You, you seem like a good girlfriend, like you're trying to make an effort for your guy, trying to adapt to him... You could do better and do that stuff for a guy who treats you how you treat him.

[Asker]

Thanks. I'm stuck with a lease with this guy so I'm under tremendous pressure. I just hate having to be the punching bag. Yeah, I'm not perfect. I've had times where I lashed out on him but for someone to change so drastically it must be an underlying issue that hasn't surfaced yet.

[Opinion Owner]

Have you ever spoken to him? Tell him exactly this that you wrote here, about walking on egg shells and all that. He should at least feel guilty enough to try and make an effort to stop. If anything, he can even go to self referred anger management.

[Belzedla]

You need to leave. He's not happy, you aren't doing anything wrong, but he sounds miserable with himself! You should really reconsider your relationship.

[pr3ttybr0wn]

What you're doing wrong? Nothing. He's a jerk times twenty.

[Marstalk]

I would suggest couples counseling but also individual counseling for each. It sounds like he has a lot to work through to be that angry and abusive. I can tell you I am hot and cold a lot but there are certain reasons for that. But that does not excuse my behavior to be taken out on the ones I love.

[summiter]

He seems to have some issues. How is your sex life with him? Do you have sex often and is it rewarding for you? Does he have anger issues with others? ow old are you two and how long have you lived together?

[Asker]

Our sex life could be better but it's not terrible. It was better when I first moved in with him. We have it 7-10 times a week. On weekends we're usually excited often because we have time so we're at it often. He has anger issues with his mother and friends, he's afraid of his military dad still. He's 26, I'm 23. No kids, I'm still in college. He's graduated.

[Asker]

Oh and he's kind of a selfish lover... if you know what I mean.

[summiter]

If he does not change... time to move on. Life is too short

[zinithin]

Get the fuck out. It's emotional abuse, he will wear you down to nothing. You'll be an empty shell of a person to do his bidding. Do whatever you can to get him out of your life.

You do not "have" to work this out.

[Kiwifun]

Umm... he needs therapy

[ThisIsMyUsernam]

He's not treating you right anymore, simple as that and you might need to consider breaking up or at the very least moving out. Trust me, you haven't done anything wrong.

[Ihav2fart]

Time for a new boyfriend

[LukasTheLovely]

You're living with a psycho. Get out of there!!

[Anonymous]

"Can someone tell me what I'm doing wrong?"
you are with the wrong guy