Sexual Relationships
+1 y

Why do guys have to go so hard and fast?

I've had sex with my fair share of partners, but something I've noticed, especially recently, is the number of guys that go like a jackhammer from start to finish... If I try to change the pace, or ask them to slow down/go softer, they'll usually slow down for 30 seconds or so, then immediately pick up the pace again. The same thing goes for going as deep as possible. This is usually only an issue with really BIG guys, but they will repeatedly insist on slinging my legs over their shoulder. This often can be really painful, especially if they follow precedence and don't bother getting me relaxed enough beforehand. So why is this? Why do guys ignore any request to slow down, or to do anything to make things mroe comfortable/fun for their partners? NOTE: I am aware that not every male acts like this; but it does seem to be a majority.
0 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • Too many guys take porn seriously. Believe it or not, you're supposed to get a woman warmed up with a lot of foreplay. No, not 5 minutes of kissing and telling her how sexy she is. You should be spending like half an hour or an hour of kissing, exploring her body, complimenting her, etc. to build up the tension and make her more wet/relaxed. Then when you start having sex you should go SLOW at first, so she can stretch out with minimal pain. Then you can either keep going slow and be passionate with her, or speed up the thrusts and be more rough. Either way, your goal isn't to try and break her pelvis in half with your crotch, so stop hitting her so damn hard. Just use your hips to roll with your thrusts so you can be fast and rough but not "jackhammer" her into pain. Also, listen to what she says. That's all.

    • It's biological, man. Men have conditioned over millions of years to go hard and fast.

    • @TheSpartan Have they also been conditioned to ignore women pleading with them to stop?

    • No, that's just being kind of rude.

  • Do you realize how boring it is to sit there and 'passion' fuck? I feel like a turtle walking across the street except I'm hoping I get hit by a car because it's so boring. I'd rather pull my fingernails off than not fuck rough; We're having sex, not 'making love' (so come give me a hug if you into getting rubbed).

    Me personally I like to go deep just because A) it feels better and B) it's funny hearing the 'AIII'.

    • So when the girl you're fucking starts saying things like 'ow, that hurts, slow down', you're going to ignore her, because god forbid her comfort gets in the way of you coming in 2 minutes flat.

    • Wow, take it easy. I'm not the one taking you to pound town, no need to get all worked up.

    • Wow. What a rapist.

Most Helpful Girls

  • My boyfriend does this but only cuz i ask him to. He is pretty good about stopping or slowing down if i need or asking if I need lube. I think these guys were just more worried about getting themselves off and what feels good for them. not sure if these were relationships or not, but if not then they probably could care less about your needs. But if you tell a guy to stop and he doesn't he needs an ass whoopin, that shit is just plain wrong.

    • That's the other thing... No lube, and most guys think 30 seconds of fingering is enough to get a girl wet enough for that.

    • You just need to find yourself a good guy. Granted a hookup is a hookup but for a relationship i believe that sexual chemistry is just as important as any other aspect. Me and my boyfriend always always do lots and lots of foreplay and if we don't we always use lots of lube ( i bought like an 8 pack of lube on amazon and we used it up pretty quick lol). and the only time my boyfriend fingers me is if he finished before me and I need some extra help to finish myself off, neither of us consider that foreplay. we always get super hot and heavy before having sex and we make sure to do things that will turn both of us on (even if it is just a weird small thing, like him being completely naked makes me wet). What you need is a guy who enjoys the act of sex more than finishing. even if i dont' finish or he doesn't (which doesn't happpen too often) we still consider it good sex.

  • The answer is simple: You haven't been with the right guys, some guys are like dat like rabbit style but the real make concentrate in pleasing you and will do exactly what you want to make you comfortable and good. So look for a real man to please you. Kiss*

  • you've been with the wrong guys. find yourself a more experienced or older guy that knows what he's doing and is there to please YOU, not himself

    Or a girl like me ;)

    • you lesbian?

    • @silentjocker maybe. maybe not...

    • i like you...

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

4 17

  • I think you just got a bad luck of the draw. I hate going fast. I like slow. It just depends on the person.

  • Possible reasons...

    1. He saw guys doing it in porn and they feel they can replicate the pleasure that the girl was having when those guys did it.

    2. He gets way too excited, and the adrenaline gets to him

    3. He feels dominant when doing this so he keep reverting back to his old actions

  • They probably just really enjoy doing you fast and going in as far as they can. That's what feels best for them most likely. Maybe they're trying to impress you but like you said, you've asked them to go slower.

  • Eager beavers

    • Do u not like to make guys cum fast?

    • No one likes a guy who cums too fast

    • Ok.. If u wanted to, how fast can u make a dude cum?

    • Show All

  • Most women say that they "like it rough" but then complain when we do just that.

    Another reason he might be doing it, is because he can last longet by going faster, as it slips back and forth without putting as much friction on his penis.

    • Maybe try listening to the complaints? I have no objection to a bit of rough play, but I would want my partner to tone it down if I ask.

    • I've never had any complaints, i prefer slow love making, because its more intimate, and quite frankly, it feels better. But it seems like women would rather be bent over, dominated, and jack hanmered. So why bother?

    • That's what some women like, sure. But that's not the point of the question. I wanted to know if there's a reason guys ignore what their partner is asking for, in the pursuit of their own pleasure. And if there's any other ways I can get him to listen to me.

    • Show All

  • I think they learn that from porn and think you find it pleasurable even when it is uncomfortable. Tell them directly that it is uncomfortable.

  • That's rape if they didn't listen to your pleas. Slap bang their dicks against the walls!

    • yeah you r absolutely right...

  • It's pretty much because we can cum easier when going hard, fast and deep that's what feels good for us

    • Alright, that's not an issue... But to the point of not caring if you're hurting your partner, or making her very uncomfortable?

    • A lot of inexperienced men don't actually know they're hurting and don't vocalise enough to get the hints. They think hard and fast is pleasurable to every woman all the time. Because sex doesn't hurt for men unless the woman is too dry, most men dont know that women can experience pain during intercourse.

    • Yeah that's fair... But when they're pointedly ignoring requests or complaints?

    • Show All

  • Oh I know! Like having sex where I didn't get my legs thrown of their shoulders. My ex used to do that and he would go hard for a minute then cum

    • Oh yeah guys love my pussy

    • guyssss like your pussy to fuck,,,...

    • Fuck me and you'll see why they love it

  • Wear a shirt that says "No bunny humpers."

    • lol wow

    • @bananajams77 hey it lets them know they are the wrong type of lover for her right away.

  • Quite simple: good and hard feels good for us, and often we don't really care about the girl. She's just a prop.

  • That's what porn taught em or they think by doing so it'll leave a mark.

  • depends on the age of the guys, when you get a little older it slows down almost automatically and even you as male tend to enjoy the relaxed sex more.

  • We have to finish fast so bears don't attack us while we're vulnerable.

  • usually the female asks to get it hard and deep that I'm with

  • Because slow isn't very stimulating for guys so they go faster to make the feeling better

    • So guys prefer to cum fast than not injure their partner?

    • not what I meant. unless u tell them that u dont like it they aren't going to stop doing it. they can't read your mind

  • it feels better when you have a fast up and down motion on your penis

  • Coz we cum fast and we wanna enjoy and if we will cum we move our dick fast and hard
    Do you like being soft and slow?

    • I like guys listening to me in bed, and not trying to injure me.

    • It's sounds good

  • They key is communication! It's best to tell him what you want rather than just lay there.

    • I get that... My question is really why guys refuse to listen.

    • Threaten them with sex or in this case, no sex!

  • Because you should be a lesbian like me :) We take our time and are so gentle... unlike stupid men who just think of themselves and don't care if they hurt other people...

    • haha i like this girl, wonder who you are? hmmm...

    • :) .

    • you lesbians need to respect straight women's heterosexual orientation and stop trying to mislead them into thinking that being lesbian is som type of choice when lesbians are actually born lesbians

  • Show More (1)

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