I Am My Boyfriends Fetish.. Help. Confused?

[Anonymous]

I love my boyfriend and we have the greatest relationship. Three years and going stronger than ever. . Lately we have been talking more about our deepest secrets and our fantasies.. Today he said something that kinda shocked me. I am a black girl. He (white guy) told me how I AM HIS FETISH (how he loves black woman, how they are his fetish, everything about them he finds beautiful (body, hair, lips, attitude) but also he is sexually attracted to them in a "porn" kinda way.. and have since a small age). I got kinda confused by this and I am starting to question our relationship. . No way that is the only reason why he is dating me cause of my features and skin color? I don't know maybe he just used the wrong word to describe that he is more into black woman than other race. That he prefers them but it has nothing to do with fetishizes (even if he finds them sexy in a sexual way). Maybe me being a black woman is a bonus "he got a girl that looks like his fantasies" ... He won't treat me like a queen, love everything about me and plan a future with me if I was only a sexual object for him. I don't know I am confused...

[driel]

I get how some women don't like to be turned into a fetish but if he knows he likes black women because sexually it makes him excited then why is that wrong? He could pick from a whole range of black women out there but ended up with you because he likes you best. So ultimately it was the feature that he was attracted to that got him interested but then you as a person had to keep him interested. I wouldn't question your relationship over that. Some women like a taller guy, do I get mad at them if I am a tall guy? It's preference.

[Asker]

I get you point. I really do... as you said in your first sentence I don't like to be called "fetish" cause I am not a object.. I prefer the word preference more.. But yea. If he really has a fetish/preference for black woman that's is great... Just don't see me as a fetish. But I am sure he didn't mean it like that ;) thanks for the answer

[sexyphil]

I think he had his mouth in motion before he had engaged his brain and just blurted it out. My girl is my fetish and I love her to bits and she knows it but then I'm her fetish and I know it as well and that works really well. You can have a fetish and still be in love it just makes it that much better and doesn't mean it isn't for real so just accept it and get on with your relationship with him. He obviously loves you very much

[Asker]

Aw this is cute! :) thank you for your answer.

[SakuraChii]

I hate it when some guys do this. When there are questions about presences ln g@g I almost always see something sexual about black women. I think that it's okay to be attracted to certain races as long as your not crossing the line which is only seeing them as sexual or seeing them as a object to fit your fake preference. Those words always get confused.

[Asker]

Yes! This is why I asked this question even if it is my boyfriend.. I just got a bit "shocked" cause woman of color always get seen as an object and a fetish.. etc. It is just not right! And to have a boyfriend that says he also sees you as that is a bit off putting! But I have gotten so many good answers and I am sure his intentions wasn't bad nor was he using the right word to explain his liking for black woman!

[NatashaJ]

I think your over thinking it its good that he sexually attracted to you besides he struck by for three years and you know your relationship is not about sex right? its not like you two fuck every day and that's all you do and not even spend time together talking. I think it would be worst if you found out he never found you attracted sexually.

[Asker]

We do have a lot of sex but no it isn't about that and I know it :p I guess he used the wrong word to describe what he finds attractive :) Thanks for the answer

[NatashaJ]

Anytime :).

[Sex-Kitten]

I wouldn't worry about it. My guy is into girls with pale skin and dark hair (and a nice booty) and I just happened to fit that look. Appearances are what first get someone into you. But they alone are not enough to have them stick with you for 3 years! They contribute to sexual excitement, yes, but not their love for you.

[Asker]

Aw! This was cute. It made me smile :) but yea! That is completely truth. Thanks for answering!

[Sex-Kitten]

You welcome, beautiful.

[Coffinspire]

Men are notorious for not being able to explain themselves. Don't think too much into it. I think he just means that he's extremely attracted to black women, and you are black among everything else he could have wanted in a woman.

[Asker]

I hope what you are saying is truth :) thanks for you answer!

[AustinMan]

He started dating you for your color, in part, but he's well past that. He has a black girl fetish, not you. You aren't his fetish.

[Asker]

... I understand what you are saying. Don't read into the title :p it is just to get attention! He likes black girls and I happened to be his dream (+ more) :p haha

[Drooogie4]

I think people mix fetish and preference.
Of course it sounds like he loves you, and he's very sexually into you.
I think he means it.
Just, he made that sound awkward

[Asker]

Thank you for the answer. I actually agree. Haha, I know. I was so weirded out after he told me this, but I could tell he didn't choose his word right to describe that he is sexually attracted to me because of my looks!

[meatballs21]

You're his dream girl. Your personalities match, you get along together great - AAAAND you tick all his boxes for physical and sexual attraction.

[Asker]

This is so sweet! Haha :) I guess what you are saying is truth!

[medical2412]

I have a white girl fetish

[Anonymous]

Honestly, I'm sure he meant it more along the line of you're his type. For example, my ideal guy would be 6'5 and tan with grey eyes but I wouldn't necessarily call him my fetish. I'm sure it was just the wrong word choice.

[Asker]

yea that is what I am thinking. thank you :)

[Opinion Owner]

No problem! But yeah don't overthink it, sounds like y'all have a great relationship!