I felt pressured to give him a blowjob and now I feel kind of gross?

[Anonymous]

I'll try to keep this short but I feel like it's going to be long, sorry. So... I'm 18 and this is the first guy I've actually dated (I'm really shy). I'm a virgin and I told him many times that I don't want to have sex anytime soon because I don't feel ready. He seemed nice at first and I thought he understood and respected my desicion but today I felt pressured to do things that I didn't really want to do. For instance, I wouldn't have minded giving him a blowjob if I knew the favor would be returned. But after he ordered me to 'suck his dick', I asked him how would he like it if I ordered him to 'eat my pussy' and he said that he doesn't want to eat me out! So I said that he doesn't deserve a BJ then, but he said he does because he 'always pleasures me', which is not true, because what he does doesn't feel good. When he touches me down there, he's too rough and it actually really hurts! I try to help him & show him how I like to be touched but he gets annoyed and says that he knows what he's doing and he knows how to finger a girl better than me (yeah, right!). When I tell him to stop he thinks I'm just playing and when I tell him it hurts, he says 'it's supposed to hurt at first' (it's never supposed to hurt, I'm pretty sure). He also said he'll eat me out only if I have sex with him (I think he was joking but still). Anyways, since he kept asking for a blowjob, I did it, and now I feel kinda gross because I feel a little used and disrespected, especially since he was pushing my head and I don't like that. I don't know, I just feel like crying for some reason... I don't know what to do now. Should I try talking to him and explaining how I feel? Or just never talk to him again? Help?

[broadsword]

No your beyond trying to keep explaining this to him. Every thing you are saying and thinking is correct. Yes he did push you into oral want return the favour until you've had sex with him that's not right and even then I don't think you'll get oral its just about coercing you into looking your virginity.
He does not sound like the right guy for you to have sex with for the first time. If he's fingering you and you tell him it hurts most guys would stop and take your advice on how to make it feel good.
This guy is all about his pleasure and not yours especially as your a virgin.
Move on to some who deserves you.

[VerNauPap]

broadsword is absolutely right this guy is a POS that only is thinking about himself

[broadsword]

@VerNauPap thanks for your support with my opinion.

[Anonymous]

Firstly this guy should never of forced you into doing that and he has no respect for you. It should be a mutual thing. And he's being selfish only after his own satisfaction. Don't ever be pressured into doing stuff and don't ever feel obligated to do it. Leave this douche! You deserve a lot better

[sweettckae]

Honey save yourself the aggravation and dump this idiot. First of all, its not supposed to hurt when a guy fingers you. And please please please!!! dont have sex with this idiot, he doesn't deserve it from an innocent girl. This guy sounds like my idiot ex, who thought he knew what he was doing with me. Its never good to feel pressured by a guy... but most guys will want all of what youve mentioned. And im sure you know that when you find that one guy who will respect you, he will be slow and actually listen to you instead of forcing you to do what you dont wanna do.

[Brittanymaexoxo]

Do not ever fall for a guy who says that they will eat you out when they've said already thwy won't, they're liars and will use it to get what they want. When it comes to the pain, you are right, it is not suppose to hurt at all and I would honestly not have him touch me until he is ready to listen to what YOU want. You knnow your body better than anyone else and you know what feels good vs what does not. I think that is a little arrogant on his end for saying that he knows what he's doing when you have told him otherwise, it is probably a control thing I would say.

[dreamergirl94]

Please oh PLEASE walk away!
Reading this hurt my heart. A guy who really cares about you would NEVER EVER treat you this way. He should be respecting what you want.

Walk. Away.
Now.
You'll save yourself, trust me.

[MaskedSanity]

Why are you with this clown? He's clearly a selfish assshole and hasn't made a single attempt to listen to you or your guidance.

Dump his sorry ass and find yourself a man that actually gives a shit about you and your satisfaction. It won't be hard since there are literally thousands of men that get a huge kick out of being expert providers of sexual pleasure to their partner.

[Sara413]

Wow he is a fucking ass hole who has zero respect for you! Please don't continue to date or see this person. He is bad news. It's absolutely unacceptable how he treats you. It's abusive.

[Bri11801]

Ok so I think you should tell him what he is doing wrong and tell him that what his actions and words did and made you feel... He is your boyfriend so be honest if this is a serious relationship

[kap_nss]

He's a bastard and I think you will soon regret what you did with him. You have to learn to avoid this stuff earlier.

[Asker]

Yeah, I already regret it. It's a good thing I didn't have sex with him.

[Spermdumster666]

"I felt pressured" your 18 grow up and get a backbone. Nobody can make you do anything you don't want to do and if he's a jerk then dump him and stop playing the victim in your own life.

[abc3643]

He needs to go. However, I need to warn you: many young guys will be like this.

[Asker]

At what age do you think they'll stop acting like this?

[sweettckae]

sorry to chime in, but most guys dont mature... ever.

[abc3643]

140. Actually, it gets better because, as boys become more experienced and their hormones subside a bit, we are more respectful. You should date a nice shy nerdy kind of guy who, if you just give him a kiss, he will explode in his pants. Once you meet such a guy, you then need to take control of the relationship because an inexperienced guy getting some TLC is like a little kid with their first ice cream - they just know that they want more. Honey, please try and relax and don't think you are terrible, but you also do need to be more assertive in your desires when a horny boy is constantly begging. Learn from this and move on. If you stay with this boy, what he learns is that he can always get you to do it again, so he will keep asking.

[ivaneca]

@sweettckae, well I don't know what kind of guys you know then. Yeah, there are guys who don't mature though, she partly right. But there are plenty out there who do and some even at a fairly young age. Though not too many, I guess. This guy sounds like an asshole, you should try looking for someone better in my opinion.

[VerNauPap]

there are some good sweet guys that care about you - and your comfort and pleasure if you keep looking for the self-centred typical asshole types thats what you are going to get

[mutedaisy]

Why are you with him?

[Asker]

He seemed very sweet and respectful at first.

[Supergirl0812]

You never talk to him again! He is selfish and doesn't give a crap about what you want or like! There are tons of guys in this world who will care about what you want, do not waste your time

[mar47]

fuck this guy he's a douche. move on

[Eternallylucky]

He is using you and guilting you into sex. Ignore or cut off contact completely. He is a potential rapist.

[Rick_Woodlands]

Yeah, sex with someone you love shouldn't be like this. You deserve better than this jerk.

Dump him and let him know exactly why.

[JustChilling]

Get rid of him if he won't listen to you or return the favor. It'll only go from bad to worse.

[tyber1]

That dudes a loser. He doesn't know how to please a woman. Find someone who does so that your first time doesn't consist of him just hurting you until you cry.

[Born2Suck]

I would like be treated like you

[Wild_child]

Stay away from this guy! He is way to rough with you and making you feel guilty so that you give him what he wants.

[Blue2]

breakup with the fuckup

[goretcki]

Ditch him and find someone better

[Sabretooth]

ditch this loser.

[chicago8116]

did you let him cum in your mouth?

[Asker]

No, I was mean and I stopped right before he came.

[chicago8116]

why did you do that? that was not nice what a cock tease u are

[Asker]

Because he's an asshole and didn't make me come so why should he?

[Anonymous]

I truly believe that, that guy does NOT know what he's doing and he's being incredibly selfish. A guy who is great in bed, listens to you, and lets you guide him because after all... you know what works best for you and every girl is different. This guy has a large ego, and is incredibly insecure and wants you to think he knows what he's doing-which clearly he does not! You need to talk to him, and it may be an awkward conversation but you have to tell him that he needs to be gentle with you, and that you are not ready for oral. If he gets mad at you and tells you he's better, then you need to leave him because he won't learn and he won't please you if he doesn't listen to your needs.