Got any jokes to tell?

Here, i got some to start off.

- So i was sitting on this train in Bangkok and, out of nowhere, this really hot chick came and sat down next to me. As i was sitting there, i couldnt help notice how truly hot she was; not to mention, she was actively checking me out. I sson became aware of this fact and couldnt help but repeat to myself, "Please dont get a boner, please dont get a boner"... and then she did.

- What educational field lost the most teachers during the Second World War? English Majors

- Why was the supply of oil increasing in Germany near the close of the Second World War? The Western Front was coming to them.

- Did you ever hear about the man who feel into the tub of varnish? Eh, it was a terrible end but a beautiful finnish.

- Why are so many youths joining sailing clubs? Pier-pressure

- My friend once looked up at the sky and remarked, "Well, dad will be on the plane by now". Upon asking him where his dad was going he simply replied, "Nowhere, he is taking two inches off the bottom of a door".

- After cutting the lumber short three times, the carpretner got the wood stretcher. Yes, she was a fine piece of ash, nice tones, completely flat, and easy to nail.

- Why was the Prussian Orchestra thought of as the worst in the world? They couldnt Reed.

- Why was did the man need a massive wrench? 'Cus he had big nuts.

Got any jokes to tell?
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