Sexual Relationships
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Would you do a threesome?

So my fiance has always had a fantasy of a threesome. I finally agreed to do it and we met with the girl (his f**k buddy from high school) I have done it before but I was the extra girl never the girlfriend and in this case the fiance. For some reason I am nervous and concerned. I feel like I got all my questions answered but I'm worried I missed some and if we set enough boundaries (not many to begin with) ... any advice
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Most Helpful Guys

  • My wife and I had many FFM threesomes (she was bi) and several MFM ones. I was always more interested in her being the center of attention, so I think that's why they always worked out well for us. Threesomes aren't for everyone, but if you and your fiance have discussed the matter extensively and want to proceed, you should set down a set of ground rules. They can be whatever you decide them to be, but they must mutually agreed to and adhered to. Your threesome partner should know what these rules are beforehand, too. Some things to consider is what types of interactions are permitted or forbidden between them, even down to if they are permitted to continue anything if you must leave the room for a moment. I also suggest having a safe word that you and your fiance know that if uttered by either of you, the threesome stops then and there. My guess if you may fear he'll pay more attention to her than you, which is both a natural fear and common issue. That should be addressed in your ground rules, too. I'm sure there there are a lot of areas I haven't covered, so if you have any specific concerns, just ask. Good luck with your adventure!

    • I guess I do have a concern that maybe he will make it all about her

    • And like I said, that's natural and fairly common, but with communication between the three of you, it can be managed. I presume you will not be interacting with her, right? And while I don't know what you are prepared to allow them to do with each other, always try to be in physical contact with him, even if it's kissing him or rubbing on him while they're doing whatever they will be doing. And it's also something she may be able to do with him while you and he are the primary show. Personally, this is why I've always preferred MFMs because it's a lot easier for two guys to pay attention to one woman at the same time than with a FMF where the females doesn't interact sexually and one guy is trying to pay attention to both of them. It usually doesn't work as well. But good planning and communication can make it work out.

    • I will be interacting with her all 3 of us will be interacting with eachother I just don't know how all its going to go down when the tone comes

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  • it should be three people having sex. no one should feel like the odd one out. one of you should be giving someone else attention at all times.
    That said, you and he are sharing her. Let him do whatever. I think that, so long as you and he communicate well, and trust each other, and you both trust her, you shouldn't worry too much about boundaries.

    The big boundaries are for afterwards. You don't want him focusing on her. You don't want YOU focusing on her. And you don't want her fixated on either him or you. If she had a blast, and wants to be with you BOTH again, go for it! But make sure that it is known that if it is only her and him, or her and you, in any situation, boundaries are to be respected. You're just after fun, after all, not something that will affect your relationship.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Personally, I'd never be comfortable with it. But some people enjoy it, and you've had one before so you have some idea of what you're getting yourself into. BUT. Being the extra person is probably completely different from being part of the couple. Do you really want to see your partner interacting sexually with someone else? Think about it carefully. It's likely to feel completely different from your previous experience, and you may or may not enjoy it. Also, I would be wary of choosing a third person who your partner has a past with. They may have only been friends with benefits, but there's still a history there which could make this harder on you. Just keep it in mind.

  • You can still set more boundaries.

    I've had a threesome, with my friends with benefits and another girl he had slept with a few times. It was a mistake, because I didn't like the girl very much (would never have sex with her alone) and it turned out she was very jealous. Under different circumstances it could have worked though.

    Try not to get jealous and see it as an experience instead of something scary and threatening.

  • I would only maybe consider it if I wasn't in a relationship with anyone involved. There is no way I would do it with someone I was dating, plus some other girl. I would get jealous, even though I was also participating.

    • @Ramieres No, I haven't. I don't have any intentions to, but I'm not completely against it either.

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What Girls & Guys Said

16 20

  • Not within a relationship. It will all ways put great strain on any relationship. Best avoided.

  • I would never be into a threesome.. one women is enough for me.. I give her all my attention only... when I am with her and she in turn gives me all of hers.. anyways three is a crowd

  • Just trust eachother and relax and enjoy

  • I would never want to share my boyfriend with anyone, fiancé is far from that

  • I wouldn't do it in a relationship, too afraid of feelings getting hurt.

  • I'm not gonna 100% say no, but I think it's very unlikely.

  • Given the fact that most girls can recover from 1st O more quickly than most guys, it really should be MMF. I'm not into that because I don't want to see another guys hairy ass naked body and lie girls naked party.

    You should tell him u r almost as interested in MFF w old fuck of his as you are it's an MMF with an old fuck of yours, if hemdoesnt have issue, Mary it

  • wouldn't want it to be someone that she had a thing with, fucked before. I would have reservations that having the threesome could stir up old feelings.

  • No, I'd never do a threesome. Sexual contact between my girlfriend and anyone besides me is probably the one thing that i consider entirely 100% off limits (or means for breaking up if it DOES happen). Also, i have no interest in doing the same.

    Its such a violation and betrayal that i would instantly break up with a girl just for suggesting it.

    • How is it a betrayal if she first talks to you about it? Would you really dump a girlfriend for simply mentionning it? Do you have other subjects like that in your minefield? Like she could be having a normal conversation and boom ! She just got dumped...

    • @JuicyBrain Suggesting it isn't exactly betrayal. Only doimg it behind my back, or doing it after i turned her down would be betrayal. But if she suggested it, that'd give me a good idea of what 'kind' of girl she is - and I'd no longer want anything to do with her. Now i probably should've been more clear. If she suggested am FFM threesome, I'd politely decline her offer and go on like nothing happened. That's because (unless she is bisexual) if she offered an FFM she is likely doing it for MY sake and not because she wants pleasure out of it. I'd appreciate it, but i wouldn't be interested - because i wouldn't want any girl but her. However, if she suggested an MMF threesome, it becomes less of "suggesting" and more like askin "can i please do this?". If its an MMF threesome its because she wants pleasure. She wants the experience. In other words: she wants another man. And to me, that's enough to break up

  • Its not that I'm close minded but I would NEVER.

  • Yeah, I would.

  • Nope one man is enough.

  • No I only do onesomes which is me all by myself alone forever

  • Nah I'd never do it. I do not want to see my man have sex with another girl.

  • Yes I would do one

  • Been there, did that. . . and more than once.

  • I'm way too jealous of a person to ever do that lol

  • You need to be comfortable about it before you actually do it, so if you're having doubts or are nervous then tell him. I agree with KSoma, it should be three people having sex nobody should feel like the third wheel. So maybe first you, your boyfriend, and the fuck buddy should hang out grab some drinks and fool around the first time and if you had fun then plan the threesome for the next outing.

  • Not really.

  • I don't do threesomes because I know it'll ruin our relationship to bring a third person into our sex life.

  • Show More (16)

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