How to relax during oral?

[Anonymous]

I have been with a few guys and I can't acheive an orgasm with them (even my current guy). Even with oral and fingering. I can't seem to relax. The whole time I squirm and end up telling him to stop. I know he's feeling like shit bc he can't give me an orgasm and I don't know what to do. It's like my clit is too sensitive? The only way I get myself there is rubbing the hood (full clit coverage). I can masturbate with him there and get an orgasm, so I am comfortable with him seeing and hearing me have one. I want an orgasm with him so badly, just a little lost.

[Dargil]

Two ideas.
Place you and him in a comfortable setting, have the lights low (so you don't feel so self conscious) and give yourself the best session you know how. Let him watch as close as need be. He needs to study and memorize exactly what you do. The next time you are together, get into the exact same setting, start yourself off and have him take over. Having the same sensations hands free should be exciting. Dont hesitate to coach him.
If you are in an experimental mood, try this.
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a10507-four-fingering-turning-foreplay-into-the-main-event

[broadsword]

Very common issue. The more you worry about it the more elusive it will become. I understand your issue many women have an over sensitive clitoris. Your right to so it's best stimulated through the hood. You need to explain this to your lover.
I've found that some vaginal fingering in tandem with oral clitoral stimulation to sort slightly distract the full on sensitivity of just tongue on clit.

[Asker]

Penetration totally distracts me from clit stimulation (orgasms). He wants me to rub myself during sex, but I can't concentrate. When I do, I barely feel what i'm doing. It's like I can only focus on one thing.

[broadsword]

Well oral sex is very different time and practice plus good communication with your lover will get you there. A woman needs to be shown and taught a that an experienced lover can work on her and with her through her sensitivities. You feel like your clit is over sensitive because purchasing to expose it to a guy. Outgoing and hang done this much before. Yes it's sensitive very sensitive and you've spent years learning how to touch it. The pressure and speed, when to rub harder and faster. How wet you like it. A young man needs to work this out and be shown guided to your enjoyment. Most young men are just blown awAy by the fact your letting them enjoy your pussy. It's like a young boy in a sweetie shop. I want to try them all Now. They get pussy drunk. Forget and over looked. That to be invited back again you have to treat her well and spend time giving her pleasure in the way that she wants to receive it.

[broadsword]

I've all ways found and felt if a woman wants to enjoy good penertrative sex , she must take control. A guy will all ways find it hard not to just thrust to orgasms.. For me Icelanders thrust deep and leave it in deep and let the woman grip and feel it with all the muscles in her vagina. Like doing kegels on my penis. Wait a half minute then pull back drawing out more vaginal fluid drive home again and let her squeeze and enjoy the sensation of hard penis deep inside her vagina. Stretching her wide open. Rocking and grinding trying to engage her clit with pubic bone and try in to get my penis head to stimulate her cervix. Many women enjoy that deep stimulation. I've had women orgasm from this sort of none thrusting techniques. Then feeling their vagina spasm in orgasmic convulsions has made me cum too. another great technique is for you to go on top. Stop him thrust with your body weight. Tip your pelvis forward and engage your clit on his shaft base and rock on him

[Asker]

I'm so afraid of hurting him while on top. I don't want to bend a certain way and pop or break something. I know a lot of women say they achieve orgasms from cowgirl. I just find my concentration to be the hardest thing to manage.

[broadsword]

It's not possible to hurt a fully erect penis with a vagina. So don't worry about that. Sex is one of those tough but such rewarding things. For women it must not be goal driven the harder you try the more difficult it will get. The enjoyment needs to be the trip itself and not the destination. Women are so maternal, giving and want to please. They get so wrapped up I. Providing pleasure they loose sight of their own pleasure. The joint pleasuring together that is much more amazing sexually. Sitting on him will stop him from thrusting. It's the thrusting that makes men cum. The sliding wet warm sensual feminine flesh back and forward over the rim of the penis head rim. If you can stop this or control it then he will last longer. Tip your hips forward engage your clit with the base of the shaft of his penis and grind your clit against it. To encourage your orgasm. get him to suck and play with your breast and your ass too.

[chintita]

you have to breathe extremely evenly, focus on your breathing rather than the orgasm and it'll come to you. just imagine you're melting into the bed with every exhale.

[truthbeknown]

Maybe it his speed, or too much force with his tongue. He may have to focus on the sweet spot for a bit and then move around to other areas to let your body settle down, or stop completely for a bit to let you calm down.

[abc3643]

Get drunk... believe me, that will do it.

[Asker]

I've gotten tipsy with him and it did loosen me up some...

[LoveSpurts]

It happens with guys also. Often when we are with a girl (maybe a new girl) and she is sucking our cock, it is hard to relax to the point where you can orgasm and give her your sperm. She wants it and you want to cum, but something happens. It sucks!

[wdogg590]

It is up to you to instruct him on what to do. Even I prefer this. Some guys may have more experience than others, sure, but all women have their own preferences and it is not fair to expect the man to know how you specifically pleasure yourself.

Let him watch and feel now you do it, and respond appropriately when he gets it right and give him reassurance when possible.

[Asker]

He's only been with one other girl besides me, so, I know he isn't a "pro" I always let him know if something doesn't feel great. During oral it seems like nothing feels great though, or it feels too good? I feel like every tongue stroke is too much...

[Anonymous]

most woman and girls like you hard to reach to orgasm don't worry that is normal