Is trading oral for anal fair?

My boyfriend won't give me oral and I really want it but he really wants anal and I don't want to. I'm afraid that if I ask him for oral he'll ask me to do anal. Do you think that's fair?
Updates:
+1 y
I do give him oral but he says he doesn't think he should get it since he doesn't give me oral. But I love giving oral almost as much as I love getting it. What should I say to him if he says that?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Sex is not politics. You're not making some kind of international trade agreement, you're trying to make love. Sex should always come from the heart, not from cold calculations and "deals". It's fucked up to expect your partner to do something that they don't like, simply because you'll have fun. So no, the deal is certainly not fair, for neither side.

  • You should never have to "trade" sexual favors and never be forced to do something you don't like.

Most Helpful Girls

  • I think it's a sexual incompatibility and that you should probably get yourself a new boyfriend with which you are compatible. Many men will be jumping at the chance to give you all the oral sex you could ever want without putting any conditions on it.

  • I don't think it's fair for either one of you to push the other to do something they don't want to do.

    Question tho - do you give HIM oral? If so, it's only fair he gives it to you too..

  • You shouldn't do it if you don't want to. That's just not right.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Tell him its not a fair trade. That after he gives you oral at least 10 times then it will be equally and you can ease into anal starting with finger. Then after finger 5 times he can get actual anal. Sounds like a fair trade to me if my girlfriend came at it with me :o

  • Sounds like it to me. Who knows. If you put some heart into it, he may find he likes muff diving and you may find that the utter surrender of anal sex speaks to you.

  • NOOOOOOOOOO!

    anal hurts and can rupture your organs. totally not comparable.

    • thats only if your fuckin stupid and dont practice an make sure you can hand his dick, i do anal at least 2-3 times a month an i never get injured because i actually prepare for it

  • Whats fair is doing something you may not enjoy because your partner would. That should be the mentality not the I want what I want and screw what he/she wants. If neithe of you are mature enough to do something for the other then you probably have a lot more to worry about then sex.

  • I don't feel like doing something you don't wanna do would be fair on either part actually..

  • Do you give him oral?
    Thats a fair trade.
    Oral doesn't equal sodomy. Haha

  • "trading" , wut? =.= Now maybe it's just me but the last thing I want to do is mix business and pleasure together. I think if you have to resort to trading for sex favours , you pretty much are off on the wrong foot.

  • ya that's fair. he does you want for something he wants

  • No, If you give him oral... he should give oral to you. If he wants to do anal... you should be able to peg him;-P

  • yes its a fair trade.

  • I think you getting oral should be expected, you shouldn't have to trade for it. It is probably the main way I orgasm with a man.

  • I can see a trade but this isn't a even trade in my opinion. Anal is so risky and so much more unsafe. Not to mention most likely incredibly uncomfortable if not painful for you.

  • Sounds fair

  • I think it is

  • No it's not. It's up to you if you want to do it. If he's not giving it to you, you have the right to deny him oral

  • What? Maybe oral for oral. But oral for anal... wtf. Anal is something entirely different. Maybe don't give him blowjobs if he refuses to lick your puss. Now that's fair.

  • ya iv got to get my ass ready to take it soon because i finally got me a boyfriend and i dont know what role he plays in bed but im gonna have to prepare for it. also think of if he doesn't like the taste at all and he might not like it if you prepare your but befor hand or you will be in for rude awakening boo

  • Tell him you'll trade anal for anal.

    • haha best comment I've read all night

  • Well it kinda sounds fair. Maybe you should both try it while putting a safeword for anal so that he stops when it hurts you.

  • So you're worried that by simple asking for oral that you would be indebted to anal. Doesn't work that way. Just ask for oral, if he's comfortable performing it, good. Relationships aren't tit for tat. Nobody should be expected to do something they are uncomfortable with.

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