How can I stop thinking of other women during sex with my girlfriend?

[Anonymous]

I've always done this on occasion but since my ex girlfriend (2 years ago) after a few months sometimes I started fantasizing about her friends during sex and now with my current girlfriend its more common to think of someone else when im trying to cum rather than thinking of her. It bothers me, I don't want to be dependent of fantasies about other women while having sex with my girlfriend.. I want that she makes me cum. Any tips?

[Anonymous]

I find it really... weird.

Do you not like... look at her? Pay attention to how she reacts to what you're doing? Are you even aware of the sex you're having, or are you just enhanced masturbating while imagining things?

What turns you on? Are you making these things happen and focusing on them?

[Asker]

Its not the entire time during the sex, just when i want to cum. So apart from that part of the sex, the answer to your questions are yes i do. Power turns me on so i usually fantasize about raping girls that i know but i can't always practice this turnon in real life, except for when i tie her to the bed or fuck her very dominantly or something. But then i still fantasize that its someone else.

[Opinion Owner]

Is your girlfriend submissive? Have you ever shared that you find roleplaying forced sex hot?

[Asker]

Never tried that, i think its maybe too much to ask

[AustinMan]

You're perfectly normal. It sounds like that if she were to play to your fantasies more, it might help.

[Anonymous]

I think you've overthinking this... Even women fantasize during sex.

To help, try being more mindful. Focus on the sensations, details of the sights, sounds, scents, etc. Your mind will wander, but gently bring it back.

[cherrymarina]

Why do u think of other women? :(
Is she not attractive enough for you?

[Asker]

She is! She's beautiful and everything i want in a woman. I just find it very exciting and horny to fantasize about other women

[Asker]

It really gets me off, you know? But i want her to get me off instead so i need to stop this somehow and was hoping for some tips

[cherrymarina]

Maybe you are not really in love with her? You say you didn't have this problem before. My tip would be to try to focus on her. That's the whole point of intimacy. But maybe others have better tips for you.

[Asker]

I've never been so in love as i am now so that's not the problem. The problem is really just in my mind

[Asker]

I know that all guys do it on occasion but for me its just almust everytime

[cherrymarina]

I think because you have done it for so long, your mind automatically thinks of other women during sex. Your brain is trained this way. I am sure there is a solution for this. Look it up online, maybe ther are books or articles online that can help you. What I know is that it takes a person 21 days to break a habit. If u are in love it is worth looking this up. Good luck :)

[Asker]

Yes, i think the same. I've tried looking up a solution for this but couldn't find one apart from one saying i should watch more porn involving couples, which i think is a stupid advice since i don't watch porn that often.

[cherrymarina]

As people here suggested, try to involve her in your fantasy. Tell her or show her what you like. I have read that you like the rape fantasy thingy, is it possible that even though it turns you on you can't imagine yourself "raping" your girlfriend so it is more comfortable for u to think of other women in that moment?

[Grungenoreos]

@99percentangel I sense a fuckboy

[Asker]

Get off here you're too young to have an opinion about this stuff

[Grungenoreos]

I turn 18 in a couple months lmao and I am one of the people in my class both education and maturity wise

[Asker]

Good for you. I'm so happy for you.

[99percentangel]

Lmao yup he def a fuckboy smh