Do you feel like you have to "Do The Work" during sex? If so, do you dislike that?

I see men complaining about having to "Do the Work" during sex... Like shut up, you know that sex is an enjoyable activity... And you're almost always guaranteed an orgasm... Meanwhile many women don't have any
Yes and I dislike it
Vote A
Yes and I like it
Vote B
Yes and I don't care
Vote C
No and I like not having to "Do The Work" during sex
Vote D
No, but I dislike not having to "Do The Work" during sex
Vote E
It's equal
Vote F
Never had sex
Vote G
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Most Helpful Guys

  • I do all the work, and it gets exhausting. Usually if I don't get to finish, it's because I'm worn out, and the girl won't get on top or do anything else to help out.

    My last girlfriend was no good at riding, but at least put in a lot of effort with oral sex before I got on top, so I could finish before getting too tired. So that's something to consider for all you girls out there who just don't know how to do it, or don't have the strength.

    The girl I'm seeing now doesn't seem to want to get on top either, but she does try to help in other ways.

    But the worst feeling for me is when I have to stop because my leg is cramped, or I need to catch my breath, and then it's just over because the girl doesn't want to take over. Not only is it extremely sexually frustrating, but it also makes you feel embarrassed that you couldn't do more, and like you've let her down. The fact that I have asthma and can barely breathe for several hours afterwords doesn't help this at all either.

    Ladies, we care much less than you think we do about how you look. That's mostly magazines and cosmetic companies trying to sell you a line of bull shit to make a profit. Most guy will gladly have sex with you even if you've never worn makeup a day in your life. The only real problem with some of you being overweight is that it can make it very difficult to get into certain positions. Others may be completely impossible. But as far as how you look? Dont worry about it. If you got as far as taking HIS clothes off, then trust me, he WANTS to see you naked too. And he already knows if you're fat or not. It's never a surprise, so stop thinking you're hiding anything. You're not.

    That being said, maybe divert some of that effort from your appearance and put it towards being an active participant in the bedroom.

    No one likes a dead fish.

  • Women definitely fail at doing their share of the work in bed and are usually sexually greedy.
    The excuse that men get off every time while women don't is subjective to who you are referring. I don't cum unless the girl has had at least 2 orgasms. I don't fall for the fake crap and know what to look for. I can make a girl orgasm before touching her genitals, have extensive knowledge of all 3 major types of female orgasm and can make any of them happen to any female regardless of if they have done it before or not.
    SO... as much as I enjoy working on a female and getting her off to the point where she is dizzy and loses her ability to speak from mental shutdown... It would be nice for a female to take some initiative and have some enthusiasm when it comes to reciprocating.
    Otherwise she is simply acting as a wet hole to get off in.

    • Women have to work harder to keep their bodies sexy bc men are "visual"

    • Mute point. Men have to work harder at all other aspects of attraction, because women judge us on everything including looks. Because women are just as shallow but for many more things.

    • Sir, message me I want to become your apprentice :-D

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Most Helpful Girls

  • The guy usually does all the work which I like. I did the work today though and I enjoyed it and actually orgasmed :O :O :O and he really enjoyed it and said I was good on top. Burnt some calories doing it so doing the work isn't always bad. I don't like getting all hot and sweaty sometimes, but the room was cool.
    Sex is equal though, you have to share it out at some point. Males do the work in the animal kingdom usually anyway.

  • sex/love making is about both parties enjoying ea. emotional connection. learn to explore ea. other and make ea. other feel good. at the end you are both satified not necessarily having an orgasm thats a plus and when the connection is right, you will reach that leavel.
    if sex is about who is doing the work, i would assume you are not satisfy with your partner.

  • Sex SHOULD be an enjoyable activity. It's give and take: if one person is doing "the job" and the other person is just lying there like a dead fish it's not as enjoyable as it can be (at least that's my opinion).
    In this situation a guy might still orgasm (let's face it, it's in general just easier for them), but that doesn't make it good sex.

    • yeah, the guys can have weak or bleh orgasms.

    • @SovereignessofVamps Exactly.

  • In my younger years, I was doing most of the work. These days I'd prefer to put in an equal amount of work but usually he gets so worked up that he puts in significantly more than me at times.

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What Girls & Guys Said

8 40
  • If a man isn't pleasing you it's your own fault for not teaching him how to give you a climax. "I dont want to hurt his feelings" is complete bullshit, all i do is focus on the womans pleasure and make sure she's comfortable and enjoying herself, if she isn't and doesn't tell me then how am I supposed to know? I prefer to be the one doing most of the work, but sometimes i just wanna sitback and watch her do it all, depends on my mood and varies.

  • i always make sure my partner is satisfied and well taken care of but 95% of the time I am left hanging or doing self service I think it should be equal but I also think the gal should always come before the male

    • I always make sure my wife cums first

    • @Gloverboy6 always best to do married or not make sure they cum first and you'll always have them coming back for more

    • Life story for me. Grew to complete hate sex... would rather just masturbate since it's actually more enjoyable, I can get it done faster.. and I don't have to pay attention to someone who I don't believe deserves any attention. Maybe I've just had sex with too many women who just plain sucked at it, but it's just boring now. Also, almost never came during sex. 99% of the time I had NO ORGASM. After a while I just ended up faking an orgasm to get it over and done with... Feel like I have a lot in common with what women tend to complain about.

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  • He better just lie there and take it

  • prefer a good half and half. yea, guys generally like to be in control... but here are two reasons...
    -at some point, a brother gotta rest... so she has to take over and "do the work".. all that thrusting ain't easy on the back
    -doing "the work" shows the other person you want them, and girls get that a lot.. do you think guys don't want to feel wanted too?

    Tch, and women wonder why guys are selfish and just get theirs only... well.. they "did the work"... i believe the reward belongs to them only.

    • i agree

  • I don't care. She can lie there like a the proverbial bump on a log... just moan once in a while.

  • If you equate sex to work, then you're doing it all wrong.

  • You are right about one thing, and that is women not always getting an orgasm
    The reason for that is in most cases the guy doing all the work, if you were on top and you're the one doing the work you would know what feels good to you and you would have an orgasm, just like with sex toys..

    Guy ejaculating doesn't mean he had an orgasm by the way

    • what? how do you ejaculate w. o orgasming?

    • @SovereignessofVamps sadly most men don't know how an orgasm feels I never knew until i tried prostate massage Simply ejaculating feels nothing like an orgasm

    • are you serious? guys get exhausted after they orgasm.

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  • Each partner should take turns being the dominant one (the one doing the work). Always being the "worker" can make the sex boring faster.

  • its always the guys that do the work e. g. if he wants me to deepthr**t him then all I have to do is open wide and try not to choke while he thrusts.

  • Back when I was still in "OMG HOT FEMALE BOD!" mode, I wanted to try to make them as happy as they made me. However, as the years wore on, I did begin to feel I was making all the effort. Now I suggest she do some things to balance it out. Sex shouldn't just be a beauty present to give guys or a way for guys to show a lady how much he cares for her, it should be mutual.

    I have slept with 11 girls through natural means (as opposed to visiting ladies of the night) and only 5 of those played any active part (the last one only because I asked her to and she wasn't very good at it). For 3 of those 5, they thought blow/handjob was worthy enough contribution (even though I told them to only do it if they enjoyed it because they do nothing for me).

    I very rarely orgasm but make sure they do.

    /rant

  • I've never had sex but I would hate to do all the work and or if she is submissive.

  • I don't mind doing the work... its sex after all! One of the best ways to get the blood flowing and the heart pumping!

    However, I do like when my woman take some initiative and gets in on the action LOL

  • It's the woman's responsibility to perform fellatio. If she doesn't do so, then she's bad in bed. Bottom line. Also, if she's not thin and attractive, then she's bad in bed. All she has to do is suck dick and then put out, and not expect cunnilingus in return, since that is unnatural and disgusting.

  • I'm very orally fixated so I'm already doing a considerable amount of work. And I don't mind it one bit. I'd rather do that than cum myself most times.

  • I totally hate it! lol
    Just imagine you make pushups, but not like 1 pushup every 5 seconds, but 1 pushup each second! And that for 5 minutes. That is hardcore sport workout. Usually I'm totally exhausted after some minutes and faar far away from cumming. Not enjoyable at all to me, I totally hate intercourse. But it is great if you are a real sportfreak ;)
    Just try to ride a guy fast for more then 5 or 10 minutes nonstop, and your knees are in pain haha

    • I tried being on top in reverse missionary for like 5 minutes and it was awful. How guys do it is beyond me.

    • What the fuck kinda sex are you doing? How can you possibly compare that to a "hardcore sport workout"? Please, help me understand, I'm so confused.

  • Generally whoever's on top is doing most of the work. If she's just laying there like a corpse then it's going to be lousy and doubtful either of us will orgasm = a lot of sweaty work for nothing, since I'll end up jacking off later anyway.

  • i like doing "work". i love making her cum but i hate, when she expects me to do everything and doesn´t really do anything but slightly moving her hips. it makes me think she doesn´t want it... and that ruins it for me.

  • being on top is hard and i appreciate the work he does

    • How is it hard

    • it hurts my legs and it's hard to keep rhythm. can't focus on the pleasure.

  • If someone (but let's face it, it's usually the man) feels like their doing all the work and your only response is "shut up" and not even try to reciprocate, you're not worth the orgasm

    Sex isn't enjoyable if your partner is a drone, and trying to justify BEING a drone (ie, women have to work "harder" to look good, which is both false and irrelevant) isn't helping your case

    I hate chores and if sex seems like a chore, I'll just abstain or find a girl who won't make it a chore

  • we take turns switching it up w/ who's in control ---

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