Girls, SEX. Before MARRIAGE VS AFTER?

[LastNightmare]

[AskAlthea]

It is a personal choice. However, culture and religion also play a role. For example, I have Muslim and Sikh female friends who live in very religious communities, such that if their community ever found out they had premarital sex, they (and their family) would be ostracized. Also, if they plan to marry within their religious community, the guy expects her to have remained a virgin, if she is not a virgin she is unlikely to find a good guy in that community willing to marry her. If he finds out after the marriage, he will likely divorce her and the community will ostracize her and her family. Thus, in that case, I caution them strongly against having pre-marital sex. If they want to have premarital sex I remind them that they need to be willing to potentially give up their family (most of them, their family will disown them for the disgrace), and give up their religious community.

I have friends who come from conservative cultures (Indian/Asian) but their parents won't care if they have pre-marital sex and they aren't very strongly tied into a cultural community that will judge them and their family for their loss of virginity. In that case, and in the of friends who come from a liberal culture and have liberal parents, I just advice them to do what they think is right, what they want because they should live life with the least regrets. In the case of if she lives in a liberal environment, then she is not subject to men who expect her to be virgins, sure some guys might want to marry a virgin, but the majority of guys will be okay with her not being a virgin. Thus losing her virginity is a personal choice as she does not lose her family, friends, community, or all potential future husbands as a result of her choice.

[kaylaS91]

When I have sex is something I decided for myself.
I;'d definitely never wish to sleep with a guy who wants to marry me because he believes us being 'official' in the name of the law will give him access to my ladyparts, though.

[LastNightmare]

you are so sweet and so straight... I think the same way

[yoshi_wanna_ask]

After.

[Bobbob17]

in general, before. but in terms of a specific relationship waiting wouldn't be a dealbreaker if he wanted to

[OctoberBaby26]

Everyone has their different POV. In my point of view I think it is okay so have sex before marriage. Sex is part if intimacy and it should be okay to be intimate with your partner. It makes your partner feel loved and its very passionate. Nowadays it is hard not to but there are people out there that can do it and thats great for them !

[pandakame]

🤦‍♀️ ideally after, because if I married the guy I want him to know I am totally his and he should treat me well. But reality 😞 sometimes I would just want to drive to a bar and any guy wanting to have sex with me would be ok🤦‍♀️ so far I haven't done that, but I really don't know how long it would last🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

[LastNightmare]

it will really last long honey.. I will help you out babe.. don't worry

[SamanthaJane]

I prefer sex before and after marriage.

[jayjay16]

I feel when ever your ready, for me it is when we are fully committed to eachother, really know them and feel comfortable with them.

[LastNightmare]

I do agree with you hon

[Eeyore11784]

In all technicality, people should wait that way they don't know any different from previous lovers. However, I feel that sex before marriage is important in order to make sure you're compatible in bed.

[LastNightmare]

totally agree with you babe

[Beccashygirl]

Personally I don't like the idea of the wedding night being my first time. I'm not saving myself for 'that special one' because I don't believe there is only one for me. As I get older I might have fun with different guys, my best friend has done this and she doesn't regret it.

[lostgirl_searching]

I just wait a year or 2. I don't believe in Marriage. The fact that I'm remaining a virgin because it never bothered me about having sex right away. And the guys that I dated wasn't willing to wait that long. Luckily I found someone that is willing to wait and he also doesn't believe in Marriage.

[AskMeAnythlng]

I don't think I want to get married ever so before then :)