Is BDSM a deal breaker for you?

Question

If you were on a date with a person and they told you they had a fetish, would you still want to date them?
Are there some fetishes you won't want to partake in?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

No spank her. If you pander to her by treating her like a queen she will think you are weak. Submission is a woman's natural state and woman are happiest when submitting to the will of their husband or father. But often you must enforce your will upon her to submit. The rise in feminism has left a lot of women unhappy in life and 1 out of 4 women are on anti depressants.
Sometimes it's necessary when my wife isn't acting right, refusing to keep the house cleaning and have a meal prepared for when I come home from work. I tried to discuss her disrespectful behavior but she flew into a rage and attacked me so I grabbed her and put her across my knee hitched up her skirt pulled down her panties and with the palm of my hand spanked her bottom as hard as I could for 10 minutes. Her ass was red raw and she couldn’t sit down for a week. She ran home to her parents who were discusted by her behaviour and her father threatened to take his belt to her. After a week she realised how wrong she had been andrawn apologised, we had amazing make up sex. Ever since she's been as good as gold putting maximum effort into our marriage and is now pregnant. It was all just a classic shit test to test my limits and of course if I hadn't disciplined her she would not respect me. She is happier now sumitting to my will and being the good helper the lord intended

Brandonio · Accepted Answer

Most likely it wouldn't stop me from getting in the ring and giving it a try. I'll try just about anything twice. Try to think of ways you could make it work for you, it sounds like they are open minded. Unless of course we are talking about you, then the game changes a bit, are we?

1Anon · Accepted Answer

BDSM isn't a deal breaker for me because I'm into it anyway so it'd be good if he was into it too. I'd definitely still date them if we generally got on really well.

The definite no's are just anything that's illegal, no blood, scat, knives, needles or anything that would leave a permanent physical scar. I don't like electric shocks though as I jump a mile and try to run off if a cattle prod touches my skin. I think that's everything.

My fetish hard limits list is getting smaller as the weeks progress.

xHoneyxBeex · Accepted Answer

No, I am interested in certain aspects of BDSM myself and I consider myself very open-minded. That being said, like most people, I still have my limits so it would depend on what he liked. I think that's just something that should be talked about to figure out if we are compatible or not.

Ultimately, if he had a fetish I was not interested in doing AT ALL, then I would be honest with him about that and let him decide if my unwillingness to participate in it is a deal-breaker for him or not.

RJGraveyTrain · Accepted Answer

I could but there are some things I won't do. Like feet or EXTREME BDSM stuff. I find that SOME people with fetishes feel their fetish has to take priority over the sex life in the relationship, but in my opinion that isn't fair if your partner shares other interests or is put off by certain fetishes. It should be a compromise, give and take.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I don't think there would be any deal breaker just based off of talking and someone telling me what they're into. I'm open and willing to at least try pretty much anything a couple times.
I enjoy BDSM so this really wouldn't be a deal breaker for me anyway.

BlueCoyote · Answer

It depends a bit on the severity and the precise practices she would be turned on by. I'm generally not into physical pain and I wouldn't want to hit/slap/whip etc. my wife. I also don't want to be hurt myself.
Things like bondage would be fine though, as well as general sub-don role-plays.

Fancygoldfish · Answer

Yes I'd still date. He told me upfront. That's a good thing. It's not a deal breaker. You can set limits. Yes there are some fetishes I won't do.

Zer0Ghost · Answer

It would depend entirely on said fetish, there are some I would not be okay with

Warmapplecrumble · Answer

I like BDSM so I would continue to date, as long as I get some occasional vanilla. I guess my limits would be gore, illegal activities, scat. :-I

SarahsSummer · Answer

If he told me on the first date, I'd have a problem moving forward. Let's start off with what kinds of music and food we each like before getting into bedroom preferences.

Yupthatsme0514 · Answer

I would depending on the fetishes. I don't like it in the ass but I sure can take a beating!

razeoes · Answer

Everyone's got something they reserve strictly for people they don’t expect to see regularly, if the don't its because they haven't found it yet.

TheGoodGuy1337 · Answer

dominant females are a turn on tbh

TadCurious · Answer

I wouldn't be interested in a long term relationship with someone who was into the BDSM scene.

Sbelle · Answer

bdsm is about communication. when vetting a new partner, there's negotiating & that's when you find out if there's a deal breaker

AdamThomas · Answer

No, I like it as long as she isn't into anything too weird like watersports.

rach_adams · Answer

if it was a first date, and he told me he's into bdsm, yes, deal breaker.  but if we're stable into our relationship, and he shares this, ill be okay. as long as he doesn't force me.